Tag: test

Watch YOUR Words!

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Manner of Advising

The Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) said: “O Umar! You are a strong person. Do not jostle through the crowds to reach the black stone lest you injure the weak. If you find an opening, then touch it, otherwise, simply face it and utter Tahleel and Takbeer (laa ilaaha illallaah and Allaahu akbar).” [Musnad Ahmad]

On one occasion the Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi was a sallam) noticed that Umar (radi Allahu anhu) was making Tawaf around the Kaabah and as he wished to touch the black stone, he jostled through the crowds and kissed it. Umar (radi Allahu anhu) was very muscular and strong and on his way to the black stone he could have harmed someone. The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) wanted to advise him in this regard, so in order to mentally prepare him for advice he started by saying, “O Umar, you are a strong person.” Umar (radi Allahu anhu) became pleased upon hearing this. The Prophet (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) then said, “Do not jostle through the crowds to reach the black stone.”

There was once a king who saw in a dream that all his teeth had fallen out. He called a dream-interpreter, told him what he had seen, and asked him to interpret it.

When the interpreter heard the dream his complexion changed and he began to repeat, “Allah’s refuge is sought! Allah’s refuge is sought!” The king became worried and asked, “What is the interpretation of my dream?” The interpreter said, “After many years pass, your wife and children will die and you will be all alone in your kingdom!”

The king screamed, became furious, and began to hurl abuses and insults. He then ordered that the interpreter is imprisoned and called for another interpreter. He again related to him what he had seen in his dream and asked him for the interpretation.

The dream interpreter smiled and said, “Glad tidings dear king!” The king said, “What is the interpretation of the dream?” The interpreter said, “It means that you will live for very long – so long that you will be the last of your family to die, and you will remain a king your entire life.”

The king became very pleased, showered him with gifts, and remained content with him whilst angry with the first dream-interpreter. In reality, both interpretations were the same, the difference was in the way in which the interpretation was conveyed.

A man’s flesh is not fit for eating nor is his skin fit for clothing – there is nothing in him except the sweetness of his tongue.

Anonymous

Rabiul Awwal 1440

Tags Allah, dreams, eat, interpret, king, one, test, umar, Umar RA, watch, words

Marriage

Love Notes – Part 1

Love Notes – Shaykh Yahya Ibrahim, Australia

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

A study looked at Muslim couples who get divorced:
Shaykh mentioned 68% of couples in the UK will divorce in the first 3 years of marriage.
○ Most of those who got divorced are educated
○ Many of them had the kind of jobs, where they intervene to defuse conflict
● The intent of the course is to speak about love to Muslims from a philosophical perspective
● We will talk about what makes you, you?
○ What does Islam offer, to make you the best of you
● Look at the words that are used to describe marriage and love in Islam
○ Imam Ibn Hazm coined the word soul mate – the first time westerners saw that a soul can love another soul

○ Imam Ibn Qayim RH has a book called Rawdat Al Muhibeen
○ Ibn Ul Jawzi RH – Said if a man does not know how to love, he should eat hay, because he’s a donkey
○ Muslims saw that we should cling onto one another and love one another so we can become khulafah on the earth → so that children can receive the earth in a way that is better than the way that we received it, that is the concept of khulafah
● There is no book of hadith that does not mention the love between the Prophet SAW and his wives
○ The year that Khadijah RA died, became the year of sadness
○ The Prophet SAW is a role model
● What the poster doesn’t show
○ Doesn’t show what’s behind them
● When the Prophet SAW talks about marriage, he says it’s half of your deen
○ You actualize a lot of the characteristics of Islam during your relationship with your spouse
○ The money that a man spends on his family is “sadaqah” [Muslim]

When you say the shahadah, it has conditions,
○ You begin to learn the importance of Allah when you gather knowledge [ilm]
○ The second step is [yaqeen] certainty
○ That leads you to [inqiyad] submission, which leads you to practice, in the way that Allah swt requested
○ Number 5 is [sidq] to be more truthful with Allah swt
○ and that leads you to [Ikhlas], having enough, other than Allah, put all my trust to
○ Last level, is love [hob] → you begin loving Allah too much to miss prayer.
● Love is the last level of worship, and some people worship things that they should, Allah doesn’t say worship he says love “yohiboonahu ka hob illah”
‘Uboodiya (worship) → anything Allah loves for you to do, whether it is a word you say, an action you do, or a feeling in your heart
● We are not here just to talk about romance, we are here to talk about love, loving your dad, your mom, your country.

Definitions

● The origin for the word “husband” or “spouse” is very different in English and Qur’anic Arabic
● Husbandry: “convincing a bull to sire a cow”
● Other words for “spouse” in the Quran
زَ وج ■
● [2:35]
● two distinct, unique individuals that upon joining, become one so you don’t see the seam between them.
ِلبَاس ■
● [2:187]
● your inner intimate garment is called libas; nobody is as close to you as that garment
● “libas ul harb” the armour of war, she is the shield from the dunya
َصا ِحبَة ■
● 42 words for love in the Arabic language
● Sahib: the one that walks with you for life
■
ن
قُ رةَ أَ ْعُي
● [25:74]
● “fills the eyes of your husband”
● “there is no provision greater than that of a righteous woman. She is a women that when a husband sees her, he feels happiness in the heart” [Muslim]
ِحصن ■
● She’s your fortress, palace, castle
● You are the moat that surrounds her
بَعِلي ■
● [11:72]
● “My spring/fountain of all good”
● He is the one that showers me with good, with his words, his wealth, etc
● That is how Sarah describes Ibrahim (AS)
● He created the heavens and earth in truth. He wraps the night over the day and wraps the day over the night and has subjected the sun and the moon, each running [its course] for a specified term. Unquestionably, He is the Exalted in Might, the Perpetual Forgiver. He created you from one soul. Then He made from it its mate… [39:5-6]
○ When Allah talks about all these dualities (heavens/earth, night/day, sun/moon), He inserts one singularity: one soul.
○ when you get married, you’re two separate entities that come together from one pairing

So exalted is Allah when you reach the evening and when you reach the morning. And
to Him is [due all] praise throughout the heavens and the earth. And [exalted is He] at
night and when you are at noon. He brings the living out of the dead and brings the
dead out of the living and brings to life the earth after its lifelessness. And thus will you
be brought out. And of His signs is that He created you from dust; then, suddenly you
were human beings dispersing [throughout the earth]. And of His signs is that He
created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He
placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought. And of His signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth and the
diversity of your languages and your colours. Indeed, in that are signs for those of
knowledge. Surah Rum [30:17-22]

– He speaks about light and day – He speaks about the lifeless earth coming back to life and thriving with vegetation – Then he talks about the soul vs dust – And in the middle of all these he talks about the relationship in partners, and it is no longer about the dualities, it is about the singularity

→ Someone from yourselves, mates He likes it to- “signs” His about talking by verse ends AND begins -إِ ن فِي َٰذَِل َك َلَيَا ت – saying, “pay attention” – Prophet (SAW) – when Adam was created, our souls were created “like ants” – there’s a moment where the soul is brought to life. you’re born into this life and your soul itself is not extinguishable – Prophet (SAW) (Hadith of Imam Bukhari) – The souls when they were created in the time of Adam, they were brought into groupings, and the souls became familiar with one another – A long essay is written about this hadith, and it says if there is a bright soul, and it enters into a room of 1000 dark souls, and one bright soul, that soul would attach itself to the other bright soul – souls gravitate to each other … or make you hate each other’s guts – The concept of soul mates for us isn’t just husband and wife – your bffs, your parents, your teachers – scent is powerful – sometimes you might smell something in the air, maybe Coco Chanel like grandma wore…sometimes it really takes you back to a certain time in your life – Your soul remembers people, just like your scent does, and it brings warmness into your heart he said he ,(soul) روح the about asked was SAW Prophet the When – couldn’t say much that is in the knowledge of Allah and we don’t know much about it – Sometimes our soul pushes back people we should be attracted to, and that is because we need to purify our soul effort requires purification – قد أفلح من زكاها – – we attempt to connect with people for marriage and on paper they seem like reasonable candidates…but at that moment when you push back someone who is good, his soul might be too clean, and your soul might be a bit tarnished – your soul might not be accessible to that righteous man/women Good the with up matched usually is Good The – الطيبون لطيبات –

When you are looking for marriage – you need to make sure your soul is accessible to pious souls – don’t always put it on the other person

Quranic Stories about Spouses

The Qur’an is a holistic document that outlines a lifestyle for us. There are many lessons and examples for us to draw from.
● Adam (AS)
○ He asks for a “sahibah”, someone with him
○ Jannah is not enough. You need someone who loves you
■ Even the shaheed, looks behind and Allah gives him the news of them joining you
○ Allah creates for him and blesses him with his wife Hawa’
○ Allah tells Adam (AS) to not eat from the tree as Iblees is an enemy to you and Hawa [20:117]
■ (according to hadith, the greatest thing that the little shayateen can do to make Iblis happy is to convince a man and his wife to split up)
○ Iblis wanted to uncover the blessing that Allah SWT gave Adam, and expose their bad
○ Responsibility for the sin is greater on Adam (AS) (very different from other scriptures)
■ [20:121]
○ Adam AS and Hawa RA were separated when they descended to Earth
■ Jeddah got its name from Jaddah, the Arabic word for grandmother. It is where Hawa’ is believed to have descended
■ Adam AS ‘arafa-ha, or, “recognized her” a little before Maghrib and it is the same day we commemorate on ‘Arafa during Hajj
■ That is when Adam made that dua’a “Rabbana dhalamna anfusana…”
“Our Lord, we have wronged ourselves, and if You do not forgive us
and have mercy upon us, we will surely be among the losers.”
■ That dua’a and that moment of worship commemorates a moment of love that millions of people recreate on Yawm al ‘Arafa
■ Then they came together, and worshiped Allah SWT The first place that a person made sujood to Allah SWT was Adam, inside the fortified walls of the ka’abah.
● Ayyoub (AS)

○ Lots of time people say, we should have patience/endurance like Ayoub (AS)
○ For the first 50 years of his life, Allah gave him prosperity
■ (he had 7 daughters and 7 sons, wealth, the people who he was sent to preach to accept him)
○ After 50 years of prosperity, Allah began to test him.
■ The earthquake made his house collapse and children all died at once;
■ All his servants were killed and wealth looted;
■ people thought he was a false prophet, because “why would God do this to a righteous prophet? he must be cursed.” everyone left his side;
■ His body became decayed and sickly
○ His wife stayed. This man who had everything, lost everything, except his wife
■ The woman who was a mistress of the house became a servant
■ People did not want to be near her as to not “catch her curse”
■ She would ask Ayoub to make dua’a to Allah, and Ayoub said “I am shy to ask Allah after 50 years of prosperity, to ask Allah for relief after only 4 years of hardship”
■ His wife came back with food and when he asked where it came from she pulled back her scarf (she had cut her hair and sold it for food)
○ After seeing his wife suffer, this man (AS) of patience made dua’a “My lord harm has touched me and my family, and you are the most merciful of those who show mercy”
■ It was as if Allah was just waiting for him to ask…
■ A spring gushed forth and Ayyub (AS) drank from the spring, and became young and has been given their life again and everything returned to him
■ The thing that moved Ayoub was love, it is that he loved his wife more than his own patience
○ The right of the servant is to be put before the right you owe Allah CIRCUMSTANTIALLY
■ If your wife (or mom or dad etc) falls sick, and you were going to hajj and your ihraam is on and your foot almost out the door, you stay.

→ The right your family member has on you is greater than that obligation to Allah
■ Abdullah Ibn Mubarak RH – Went for hajj and saw a dream of those who made hajj and their hajj was accepted. He saw the face of a man and where he lived
● Abdullah immediately went to see him. Upon meeting the man, he found that he had not made hajj! The man said that he was on his when he saw an impoverished man. He realized that he that the wealth he had planned to use to go
Love Notes By Sh Yahya Ibrahim 5 to hajj would be enough to get the man in need on his own two feet. So he gave it to him and made dua’a that he would get to go for Hajj later. THAT is the man that Abdullah saw with a shining face.
● Prophet Dawood (AS)
○ King of his time, had many wives
○ Looked over his marketplace and saw a beautiful woman. He asked if this woman is spoken for? They said no, but she is promised to the general.
■ for a moment Dawud (AS)’s heart thought “if that man becomes Shaheed… Allah give him Jannah” lol
○ (In Surah Saad)
■ Allah sent two men (really angels) that jump in front of him and he reels back. One of them says “don’t be scared, we are two men that are quarrelling. He has 99 sheep and I have 1 (representing blessings), and he keeps desiring my 1 sheep to complete his 1 00.
■ Dawud says, he has wronged you to even suggest that he should give you your sheep.
■ Then it clicked in his mind that it was a test from Allah! It was a message indicating that he (AS) have been blessed with so much, and that generally is the one who has that one sheep…so Dawud (AS) fell in prostration
○ The stories of the Quran are full of love and passion
● Nuh (AS)
○ Imagine you are some sheikh, and you are on the pulpit for Juma’a and you are telling it as it is…Then your wife walks out and says “It’s all nonsense! He is making it all up!” Your son is sitting there and saying, “PSHHH, don’t listen to this guy. He knows nothing.” (People would be like, when your family believes, then come talk to me lol”)
○ Your wife and your son become adversaries and they become leaders of those who disbelieve
○ Imagine that is you, just a sheikh – Imagine being the Prophet of Allah
○ Nuh AS never gives up
○ Nuh is on a ship on land that has been experiencing a drought for years and people are looking at him like he is crazy – until Allah swt orders the sky to let down its rain, and the sky gushes until the waves become the size of mountains
■ And Nuh asks his son, belief in God so I can let you on the ship, his son says, I don’t believe in you or your god or your ship, I’ll go up to that mountain and it will protect me from the waters
■ So he says, my son, none will be protected except those that are on this ship, and then he refuses and he becomes one of those who drowned
■ Nuh says to Allah “When you promise, it is true, you said you would save me and my family, he is part of me and he drowned” so Allah said, “he is not your family, forget him”
● The illegitimate is not to be loved, Allah will always get you out of those drowning waters and until the last moments Allah will provide you what is good – but he will never make the illegitimate, legitimate
● What makes you and I who we are? Why are the stories of the messengers something that still resonates with us?
○ Part 1: Jasad – 70% of us is water, 30% is organic
■ The difference between us and pigs is less than 1% (genetically speaking)
■ In the Quran: Those who know God, but do not accept God are like Cattle
○ Part 2: Mind
■ Rational being, we think and can anticipate what is happening
■ Allah has blessed the son of Adam with the mind, drugs and intoxicants are haram because they take away the mind
■ Don’t think that animals do not have emotions and feelings too
■ Sheikh plays this video
● Sometimes we think we are the only beings that actually matter
● Ibn Qayim writes 60 pages on Allah quoting the ant
○ Ant knows delegation & authority
○ Knows what is home & what isn’t
○ It knows name “Solomon”, and his troops (knows our functions)
○ And the ant makes an excuse (if they trample you then they don’t know)
○ Ibn Qayyim lists 11 types of language that the ant uses
■ Allah inspires the bees regarding how it can live its life
■ Don’t ever think that the world around you is meaningless, simple experiments show that there is so much more in the world that Allah created
■ They are a nation, just like you are a nation
○ Part 3: Soul
■ There are 3 components, and this 3rd part is what makes us insaan
■ The majesty of the soul lives in the heart – The heart is the throne of the soul
● The chest is what protects the heart
● Haritha (one of the sahabah) is walking and the Prophet SAW says how are you and he says I woke up a mu’min, Prophet SAW said why? He said when I pray it is if I see Allah but I do not see him; when I sin, I see the fire, but it is not
Love Notes By Sh Yahya Ibrahim 7 there; When I do good, I see Jannah, but I do not see it – So Prophet SAW touches his chest and he says you are a believer
● Hope, mercy, love of God is in your chest, it is important to keep that spirit true
● When Allah talks about Imaan he says Allah opened his chest to Imaan (that is the imagery given to us by Allah SWT)
● That is why the heart is so important to talk about love because the heart is what governs the rest of us
● When your heart is closer to Allah, it is easier to come closer to people à that is the beauty of the dua’ of Musa “’ishrahly sadry”, open my heart to people
● The premise of this class is to bring our hearts closer to Allah so that we can come close to his servants
■ The 3 levels are ascending levels
■ Islam also has 3 levels, Islam, Ihsan and Iman; Each of those 3 levels matches our 3 parts
● Islam (Jasad) – You must physically say the words of the shahadah, pray, fast, do Hajj, and give zakat, Islam matches the physicalness of you jasad
● Imaan (Akl) – Matches your mind, the 6 articles of faith cannot be qualified/rationalized, but they are believed. Iman came to subdue the rationale that pulls you away from Allah
● Ihsan (Ruh) – Even though you cannot see Allah in life, your heart is always aware of Allah. Everything you witness in life connects you to Allah
○ Imam Sufyan al Thawri is walking out of the masjid, and a man begins to abuse him, his students try to stop him, he says no leave him and he says “I know the sin that I did that brought this upon me”
○ Imam Sufyan RH would give his students 3 rules when teaching them:
■ Correct what is between you and Allah, and he will help you correct what is between you and mankind
■ Fix what is between you and Allah privately, he will make your public good with others
■ Remember Allah when you don’t need him, and he will know you when you need him
○ There are angels whose job is to catch our hadith (dua’a) and throw it back at us because it is not worthy of ascending – hadith of the Prophet SAW armour.

Tags al maghrib, almaghrib, business, child, children, content, difficult marriage, divorce, easy divorce, husband, intimacy, intmate, islam, kids, life, love, love letters, love notes, marriage, nikah, Nooh, patience, prophet, Prophets, religion, sabr, sex, test, tough marriage, truth, wife, work, yahya ibrahim

Current Affairs articles

In Pursuit of Happiness…

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Allah says: “Know that the life of this world is but amusement and diversion and adornment and boasting to one another and competition in increase of wealth and children – like the example of a rain whose [resulting] plant growth pleases the tillers; then it dries and you see it turned yellow; then it becomes [scattered] debris. And in the Hereafter is severe punishment and forgiveness from Allāh and approval. And what is the worldly life except for the enjoyment of delusion.” ( Qur’an 57:20)

Happiness or Money?

“Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people that they don’t like.”

I believe that money can’t buy you happiness. Sure, having a lot of money is a great thing and gets rid of the stress of financial insecurity. But real happiness can’t be bought by money. Thinking about life has led me to think about this popular belief and realise it’s completely true. Although being financially secure is one of the best things in the world, it won’t necessarily bring you happiness. Many people dream of being rich. They think of all the things they can buy with money such as big houses, fancy cars, and long vacations. People make it their goal to get into a good college to get a good job and make a lot of money. With financial security, people think they have more time to spend relaxing and being happy. There are so many success stories of people going from “rags to riches” and people try to follow their footsteps and do the same thing. Basically, we all get this idea that being rich is a great thing and it will guarantee happiness, but is it true? On the flip side, there are also people who have gone from millionaires (karor pati) to living off benefits (road pati).

As Muslims we are taught to rely on Allah SWT for our sustenance, Allah provides. Obviously, tie your camel then trust in Allah. I would like to narrate a passage from a lecture of an Imam from Madinah – Shaykh Muhammad al-Mukhtar ash-Sinqitee (Allah preserve him): “The happiest of people is the one who addresses his complaints to Allah and not to his creation. The happiest of people is the one who puts his certainty in Allah and does not put his certainty in Zayd or Amr (i.e. people). If a person was in debt and your friend said I will talk to such and such a person he is wealthy. And your debt will be relieved very easily by that person. How certain will you be about your debt being settled and your hardship being removed?

But how about the King of Kings the One who has depositories of the Heavens and the Earth in His hand? How about the Most Generous, which the fullness of His Hand is not affected by the continuous spending, night and day. O Allah! Make our poorness to You, and our richness in You. Be rich in Allah, have trust in Allah. People turning away from you is indeed a blessing from Allah, He wants you to turn to Him.”

Abu Huraira (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) as saying:

“Many a people with dishevelled hair are driven away from the door (but they are so pious) that if they are to swear in the name of Allah, He would definitely fulfil that.” (Saheeh Muslim)

The happiest of people are the one who says, “Ya Rabb!” – and Allah answers his supplications. By Allah! Happiness is not in wealth; if it was in wealth, the happiest of the people would have been Qaroon, but he was amongst the most unfortunate and miserable of people, “And we caused the earth to swallow him and his home.” (28:81)

Wealth is not happiness and happiness is not when you ask people and they give you. True happiness is when Allah will open the doors of heaven for you, Allah make us from them. Ameen!

It was narrated from Abū Hurayrah (raḍiy Allāhu ʿanhu) that the Messenger of Allāh (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) used to tie a stone to his stomach because of hunger. (Ibnul Arabi in Mu’jam)

Money only makes a person want more money – it creates greed and thrives off the desire for more and more. I heard someone recently say regarding another person who has a fulfilling business that ‘he’s lazy and not enthusiastic’ simply because he has shown a level of contentment within his business and refuses to advance it further.

Why? Because, unlike many many others, by Allah, he has resisted that monetary lust and has sukoon/peace in the amount he has. And why was he called lazy? Because unfortunately, today, many people think that the successful and admirable one is he who is able to keep the revenue rolling constantly until there is more money than one will EVER need.

Abū Saʿīd Khudri (Allah be pleased with him) reported that Allāh’s Messenger (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) said,

“The world is sweet and green (alluring) and verily Allāh is going to install you as vicegerent in it in order to see how you act. So avoid the allurement of women: verily, the first trial for the people of Isrā’īl was caused by women. (And in the ḥadīth transmitted on the authority of Ibn Bashshar the words are:) so that He should see how you act.” (Saheeh Muslim)

The feeling of constantly wanting to generate money has terrible, subconscious effects on oneself. The person is in a constant trance-like mode whereby he is forever thinking about the next project that will bring him a profit and in this there is no barakah/blessings in his day for any extra Qur’an, adhkar and Islamic progression. Many so-called religious folks try justifying their love for wealth and materialism by stating companions such as Uthman Ghani (Allah be pleased with him) and AbdulRehman ibn Awf (Allah be pleased with him) who were wealthy… Dear brothers and sisters, with the wealth of Uthman (Allah be pleased with him) must come the Taqwa of Uthman as well! Scholars have also got sucked into materialism and consumerism, please see this article on scholars charging for Da’wah.

The Prophet (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) was seen by ʿUmar (raḍiy Allāhu ʿanhu) with dust on his clothes from having slept on the floor. ʿUmar (raḍiy Allāhu ʿanhu) wished to provide the Prophet (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) with a more comfortable bed and the reply was,

“What have I to gain in this world? The like of this world is as that of a traveller who is travelling in the sun and he sits under a tree momentarily and then gets up and continues on.” (Tirmidhi)

For example, In “The High Price Of Materialism” Tim Kasser says, No matter how many fancy designer clothes, cars, or jewels they might obtain, no matter how big their house or how up-to-date their electronic equipment, the lost opportunity to engage in pleasurable activities and enjoy each others’ companionship will work against need satisfaction, and thus against their happiness.

Happiness is the most valuable aim of a human being. While the earth is getting complicated and changing day by day, almost all people are trying to have a happy and fulfilling life. During this pursuit of happiness, our relationships play a crucial role. In the pace of life, when we have encountered some stressful or disappointing situation or cases, in order to take a breath we always consult our families and fly into our family’s arms. If we have our own families and their real support, it is the most reliable way to reach happiness and relief. But sometimes people can be in a dilemma between possessions and relationships. This is the point of collapsing real happiness because when the passion of money comes to a person, he starts to abandon his family. He thinks as if money will bring them happiness and a good life. But it won’t. As Tim Kasser says in the article of Mixed Messages “a focus on materialistic values detracts from well-being and happiness. For example, when spouses spend most of their time working to make money, they neglect opportunities to be with each other and do what most interests them.” And again in Downshifting in Britain

As you can see in these sentences as long as people don’t allocate enough time for their families, there is no way to make them happy. love life

“Difficulties in managing work-life balance can have a detrimental impact on the quality of the relationships between parents and children and the parent’s responsiveness to the child, with implications for child outcomes. This is particularly important for every young child, with evidence suggesting that it is best for children if they can receive intensive parental contact for the first months (HM Treasury & DTI 2003, p 13-14).”

The word ‘happy’ is defined by the Oxford dictionary as: “Feeling or showing pleasure or contentment,” however happiness means different things to each individual person. Most people’s definition of happiness would include words along the lines of ‘love’ and ‘health’, and others may include ‘family’ ‘friends’ ‘belief’ ‘achievement’ these are all things that money does not give you. The truly happy people I’ve known have been those who were engaged in meaningful work, paid or unpaid. These people were so busy living their lives in pursuit of something larger than themselves that they had no time to wonder, “Am I happy?” They just were.

The other most important step to reach happiness is our satisfaction. Because actually, the money doesn’t make us happy, it can help us just by providing some satisfaction. When we lost our satisfaction, it means we lost our happiness and this is exactly what our possessions do. Lots of people in consumer countries and societies think that they always need more money than they have now, even if they are wealthy and rich people. In the book of Clive Hamilton, this situation is stated with this sentence: “The trouble with the rat race is, even if you win, you are still a rat.” Because of the society that they belong to, they are convinced that more money means always more happiness. So without exception, all people are trying to have more possessions to be satisfied by being able to buy what they need.

In conclusion, I believe that money provides temporary satisfaction but that is up to you to figure out how to truly be happy. You need to start with basics like enough money for food and shelter, but if you try to build on your fortune then you must keep your priorities right; friends and family first. If you lose your money, then who will be there for you to catch you when you fall from that high horse that you have been riding for so long? Your friends and family. My definition of happiness would be living a healthy life surrounded by my family and friends, yes I would need money for food and shelter but after that, how much do I really need?

Anas bin Mālik (Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Messenger of Allāh (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) said:

“Whoever makes the Hereafter his goal, Allāh makes his heart rich, and organises his affairs, and the world comes to him whether it wants to or not. And whoever makes the world his goal, Allāh puts his poverty right before his eyes and disorganises his affairs, and the world does not come to him, except what has been decreed for him.” (Tirmidhi)

Ismail Ibn Nazir Satia (One who is in dire need of Allah’s forgiveness, mercy and pleasure)

24 Rabiul Thani 1440

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Unapologetically Telling The Truth Is A Terrible Thing to Admire

Post author By Ismail ibn Nazir Satia
Post date 13 December 2018
1 Comment on Unapologetically Telling The Truth Is A Terrible Thing to Admire

Why do we value “unapologetically telling the truth like it is” so highly? When did this become an actual thing that we lionize and aspire to? Why do we celebrate those who do this?

What’s the point of telling it like it is, even if people hate it? And what does it say about us as a community if this is how sincerity and authenticity is expressed? When did it become some type of significant accomplishment that is lauded by others?

There’s obviously an immediate benefit. You gain notoriety, fans, social media engagement, and maybe even just enough of a following to leverage a career (or presidency) out of it.

I have noticed a trend lately, particularly in discourse about Islamic issues online, where people are being heralded and promoted for telling it like it is.

This culture appears to be an overreaction to another problem (as most extremes often are) – speaking about issues without any principles, or watering down and politicizing them. When something in regards to the religion is watered down, the perception is that this is done from a position of weakness.

By speaking the unapologetic truth harshly, a person may feel they are taking on a task for the community that others are not. They are giving voice to a perspective that may otherwise be silent. They are providing objective and accurate intellectual analysis without any emotion or sugar-coating.

Validation follows. Others encourage them for speaking up and saying the things they are unafraid to say. This makes the person feel they are taking on an important task on behalf of the ummah, and continue to do so. Then they get more fans and comments, and the cycle continues.

This validation loop, particularly online when it is in the form of likes and comments, makes it challenging to engage criticisms of this approach objectively. After all, everyone is telling you this is incredible – why should you listen to the few uptight people who are so focused on tone instead of the unapologetic truth bomb you are dropping on people?

This justification comes from prioritizing the utility of giving a correct point of view over how it is delivered – especially when this point of view is drowned out by all the people with the wrong understanding.

When given real feedback on tone or etiquette, people who pride themselves on being unapologetic or authentic will respond by deflecting this advice. Focus on the intellectual merits of the argument they’ll argue. Or they will deflect it by pointing to some type of bad character on the part of people who hold the opposing viewpoint as them. Don’t worry about my bad attitude, worry about that other person’s character instead. Or they’ll appeal to authority and declare that they already have teachers or mentors that give them advice, so they are free to dismiss comments no matter how legitimate. For people who pride themselves on being objective or intellectual, these are all profoundly childish responses.

What is billed as being authentic or unapologetic is really a mask for laziness and ego.

The Qur’an lays out a model that we’ll refer to as the ‘high-competency’ approach:

By an act of mercy from God, you [Prophet] were gentle in your dealings with them—had you been harsh, or hard-hearted, they would have dispersed and left you—so pardon them and ask forgiveness for them. Consult with them about matters, then, when you have decided on a course of action, put your trust in God: God loves those who put their trust in Him (3:159).

Where in this ayah does it appear that the approach of telling the cold hard truth would fall?

Telling the unapologetic truth without regard for how people take it is the easy way out. Anyone can do that. The problem is that it does not work. It causes people to get turned off. Those who lionize this approach will counter by saying, “so what?” They put the blame on the people who can’t handle the message instead of taking responsibility for how they deliver it.

That’s why it’s lazy. It’s a low competency form of delivering a message. The only people who celebrate it are ones that already agree with it. It does not accomplish the ultimate task of winning hearts and minds or changing someone’s viewpoint.

Instead, it puts the focus on the person giving the message – how courageous, authentic, and direct they are. This makes the communication inherently ego driven because the intended audience is now ignored. The actual content of a person’s message also gets lost as they start to craft their identity around speaking forcefully instead of effectively. They show no concern for the recipient of the message, only in themselves.

The task of winning hearts and minds, or changing someone’s ideological worldview, is not done through a hot take on Facebook. It is done as the ayah above indicates – with kindness in dealings with them.

Giving hot takes on social media builds fans and followings, not relationships. The ultimate irony is that unapologetically speaking the truth actually prevents people from developing the relationships to affect positive change in the community because no one wants to be around them.

“How well you take criticism depends less on the message and more on your relationship with the messenger. It’s surprisingly easy to hear a hard truth when it comes from someone who believes in your potential and cares about your success.” –Adam Grant

It requires the hard work of building relationships with people and building community. True leaders understand that this requires years of investment into people – not all of which will be documented on social media. Success means playing the long game.

It means going to a tyrant like Fir’awn, and still speaking kindly because the ultimate intent is different than to just tell it like it is.

It means that when the young man walks into the masjid of the Prophet (s) and asks permission to commit zina (adultery), that the Prophet (s) takes him and teaches him kindly. He could have easily reminded him about the jurisprudential rulings about adultery, and the prescribed punishment – no doubt that would be unapologetically speaking the truth. But it would not have achieved the intended outcome, so the Prophet (s) had to take the approach that would actually produce results.

But wait, what about all the times in the life of the Prophet (s) when harshness was used? Didn’t he speak the truth clearly? Yes. There are always going to be situations where this is called for strategically as a tool intended for a specific result. The problem we are highlighting is not of speaking the truth clearly, but one of expressing it in a harsh way such that people are turned off. And worse, people who respond to the harshness with cheerleading and zealousness instead of genuine care and concern for the one who is wrong to gain some sense of rectification.

There is something deeper at play here than ego or taking the easy way out. Authenticity.

Authenticity is the buzzword we use to express sincerity. When I tell it like it is, I am being authentic and sincere. Not fake. Not a sell-out.

Authenticity presents a paradox: Do you do what’s effective, or do you do what is true to yourself? We might reach a certain level of success and influence by being a certain way. The challenge is getting to the next level. If that means suddenly changing how I communicate or speaking with what I term to be watered down political jargon, then no thanks. This is the mindset that allows us to morally justify our unapologetic approach, and actually double down on it when told to act otherwise.

Authenticity is a barrier to personal growth. We use this idea of it representing sincerity as an excuse to keep from changing. We have to shift from delivering the information people need to know (low-level) to creating the conditions of increasing learning (high-level).

This requires putting in the work to change our approach and character.

The Prophet (s) said that ‘the two characteristics that led the most people into Paradise were consciousness of Allah and good character’ (Tirmidhi).

Don’t let anyone subvert this in the name of unapologetically speaking the truth.

Low competency individuals are drawn to telling it like it is. High competency individuals are attracted to painting the vision of how things could be – and building the bridge to help and serve people in getting there.

https://www.ibnabeeomar.com/blog/unapologetically-telling-the-truth-is-a-terrible-thing-to-admire

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40 Sacred Hadith on Archery

Post author By Ismail ibn Nazir Satia
Post date 3 November 2018
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1 From the collection of Sahih Muslim
On the authority of `Uqbah bin `Amr, may Allah, exalted be He, be well-pleased with him, who said, “I heard The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty upon him, say while he was delivering a sermon from the pulpit – minbar,

“Prepare to meet them with as much strength as you can afford,
verily, strength lies in archery,
verily, strength lies in archery,
verily, strength lies in archery.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken in Truth

2 From the collection of Sahih Muslim

On the authority of `Uqbah bin `Amr, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said,
“I heard the Holy Prophet, Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him, say

“Lands will be thrown open to you and Allah will suffice you against their evil, but none of you should give up sporting with his arrows, and you shall know.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken in Truth

3 Selected by at-Tabarani

On the authority of Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqas, may Allah’s favour be upon him, who related,
“The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of the Almighty be upon him, said,

“You must use archery, for it is good for him who engages in warfare.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

4 Related by Abu ash-Shaykh and Ibn Abi Dunya

On the authority of Abu Hurayrah, Allah Almighty’s favour be upon him, from The Holy Prophet, may Allah the Exalted bless him and give him peace, who said,

“Learn the throwing of arrows, and do not be averse to it, for the area between the two targets holds a garden of the gardens of paradise.”

and the Messenger has spoken truly

5 Chosen by ad-Daylami in his Musnad

On the authority of Abu Sa’id al-Khudri, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who related that The Holy Prophet, may peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said,
“Learn the casting of arrows and the Qur’an.”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

6 Narrated by al-Bayhaqi the Sunan

On the authority of Abu Rafi’, may Allah be pleased with him, who related, “I asked The Holy Prophet, may peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, `Do children have rights over us as we have rights?’ The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, replied,

“Yes, the father has the same legal obligations towards his son as the son towards him.” And he said, “The rights of the son over his parent is that he should teach him writing, swimming, and the casting of arrows and that he should leave him in a good legal inheritance.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

7 Selected by ad-Daylami

On the authority of Jabir, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who narrated, “The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,

“Teach your sons the shooting of arrows!’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

8 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh

On the authority of Abu Qilaba, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who narrated, “The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said,

“Teach your young boys both archery and swimming.’”

9 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh and others
On the authority of al-Qa’qa bin Abi Hidr, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,

“Dress like the Ma’d, adopt rough clothing, wear simple garments, surpass one another in jousting, and walk barefoot.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

10 Abu Da’ud and others

On the authority of `Uqba bin `Amr, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who related, “I heard The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, say,
“Verily, with one arrow Allah almighty will admit three individuals into paradise :
the maker of the arrow who fashions it with good intent,
the archer who shoots this arrow and
the person who gathers it up (after it has been shot).’”

and the Holy Prophet has spoken truly

11 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh

On the authority of Najiya, may Allah’s favour be on him, who related, “With a quiver in my hand, I was passing by an old man sitting by the gate of Bani Sulaym. He spoke to me and said, `Will you sell me the arrows you hold in your hand or not?’ I said, `I will sell it.’ And the old man said, `Verily I shall buy it, though I can no longer shoot it. Then he said to his servant girl,

`Oh slave girl, go check my quiver and tell me whether it is full up or not!
For I heard The Holy Prophet, may Allah send peace and blessings upon him, say,

“Attend to your quivers!’”

12 Related by an-Nasa’i and al-Bayhaqi

On the authority of `Ata ibn Abi Rabah, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who narrated, “I saw Khalid bin Abdullah and Jabir bin `Amru-l-Ansari, may Allah Almighty’s favours be upon them both, casting arrows. As one of them wearied, the other said to his companion, `You have grown weary of casting arrows, but I have heard these words from The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,

“Everything that is done without the remembrance of Allah (Dhikrullah) is vain distraction and idle play, but for these four accomplishments :

a man walking between the two points of the archery ground, training his horse, learning how to swim and jesting with his family.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

13 Reported by al-Qarrab

On the authority of Abu ad-Darda’, may Allah Almighty shower His favours on him, who narrates from The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,

“All games are idle play but three things :
the riding of horses,
the casting of arrows,
and a man playing with his wife ;
And of these the most beloved to me is the casting of arrows.”

14 ad-Daylami

On the authority of Ibn `Umar, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with them both, from The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,
“What an excellent diversion for a man is the casting of arrows; and whoever
leaves archery after having learnt it, he has rejected a gift of grace.”

and the Holy Prophet spoke truly

15 Selected by ad-Daylami

On the authority of `Abd-ur Rahman ibn Shumasa that Qusaym al-Layth said to `Uqba bin `Amr, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, as he was walking back and forth between the two targets (on the archery ground) “How is it that you keep going between these two points, whereas you are already an old man?” To this `Uqba replied, “Were I not for this world that I heard from The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, I would not take this upon myself.” And he said, “I heard him say,

“Whoever learns archery, only to later abandon it, he is not one of us.’”

16 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh

On the authority of Ibn `Umar, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with them both, who narrates that The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, once missed a certain man. The Holy Prophet, upon whom be blessings and peace, said,

“Where is that missing person?

And one of them said, “He has gone gaming.”

And The Holy Prophet, Allah’s peace and Blessings upon him, said,

“What have we to do with games!”

And one man said, “O Prophet of Allah! That man has gone to cast his arrows.”

Thereupon The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,

“The casting of arrows is not one of the unlawful games; indeed, casting arrows is the very best of your pastimes.’”

17 Narrated by Abu ash-Shaykh

On the authority of Abu Hurayra, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who recalled, “The Holy Messenger, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,

“The casting of arrows is a share and a characteristic of the shares of Islam.’”

and the Holy Prophet has spoken truly

18 Reported by Abu ash-Shaykh

On the authority of Abu Umama, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said,

“Men have not drawn anything but that the bow had an advantage over it, and more.”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

19 at-Tabarani

On the authority of Saiyidina Ali, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who relates, “On the morning of Ghadir Khumm The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, wound my turban and its end fell down upon my shoulder. Then he said,

“Verily, the Lord, exalted be His Majesty, assisted me on the day of the battle of Badr and on the day of the battle of Hunayn with angels, and they were with this turban wound in this manner.”

Then the Holy Prophet, may Allah Almighty send peace and blessings upon him, went on to say,

“Truly the turban is a barrier between the Muslims and the idolaters.”

Then he donned his armour and, while holding an Arabian bow in his blessed hand, his eye fell upon a man who had in his hand a Persian bow. The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said to him,

“Put that away from your hand and take this Arabian bow and these spears of metal; Allah in His exalted Majesty will then support your faith and make you firm in faith and establish you in the land.’”

20 Narrated by al-Bayhaqi

On the authority of Jabir bin Abdullah, may Allah be well-pleased with them both, on the authority of The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,

“My love necessarily goes to whoever moves back and forth between the two points (the shooting place and the target of the archery field) with an Arabian bow, not with the bow of Chosroes (Persian kings).”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

21 Related by at-Tabarani
On the authority of Abi Darda’, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, on the authority of The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, who said,
“Everyone who walks between the two points of the archery field will have
merited the reward for a good deed for every step he takes.”

and the Holy Prophet has spoken truly

22 Selected by Abu ash-Shaykh and ad-Daylami

On the authority of Abi Darda’, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, on the authority of The Holy Prophet, may Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him, who said,

“Whoever removes his wrap from his shoulders and walks between the two targets of the archery field, will receive the reward for the freeing of a believing slave for every single step.”

and the Holy Prophet has spoken truly

23 Selected by Ibn Abi ad-Dunya

On the authority of Abdullah bin Jarad, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said,

“The Holy Prophet, may Allah bless him and give him peace, liked shooting arrows between the two targets, and he used to run along with his Companions.”

24 Selected by ash-Shaykh

On the authority of Anas bin Malik, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “I saw The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, chewing a bowstring of sinew, and he firmly spliced the end of his bow with it while he was fasting on a day of Ramadan.”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

25 Selected by an-Nasa’i
On the authority of Ka’b bin Murra, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “I heard The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, say,

“Shoot! He whose arrows reaches the enemy, provided his arrow is shot in the way of Allah, Allah will raise him one level in paradise.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

26 Selected by at-Tabarani
On the authority of Anas, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said,

“Whoever shoots an arrow in the way of Allah, will receive the reward of freeing a slave; and this is his ransom from the fire.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

27 Selected by at-Tabarani in his book `Al-Awsat’

On the authority of Anas, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,

“He who shoots an arrow in the way of Allah, whether it falls short or reaches its target, his reward for his arrow shall be as the reward for the freeing of four people of the sons of Isma’il, had he freed them.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

28 Selected by at-Tabarani in his book `al-Kabir’
On the authority of Muhammad Ibn-ul-Hanafiya, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said,
“I saw Abu `Amru-al-Ansari, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, on the day of Siffin, and he had taken the pledge of allegiance at `Aqaba and fought in the Battles of Badr and Uhud ; now he was bent over from fasting and he said to his servant boy, “Give me cover with the shield!” and the servant boy gave him cover so that he was thereby protected from his enemy whilst he drew the bowstring, weakly until he was hit by three arrows, shooting which he did not return. Thereupon he said, “I heard the Messenger of Allah, may Allah’s blessings and peace be upon him, say,

“If a person shoots an arrow for the sake of Allah and His good pleasure, regardless of whether his arrow reaches or falls short of his enemy, that shot will be a light going ahead of him on the Day of Resurrection.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

29 Related by al-Bukhari
On the authority of Abu Usayd as-Sa’idi, may Allah be well-pleased with him, on the authority of his father, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah Almighty be upon him, said,

“On the days of Badr and Hunayn, we joined ranks against the Quraysh and they have joined ranks against us; should they subdue you, go for your arrows.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

30 Selected by at-Tabarani

On the authority of Hussein Ibn as-Sa’ib Ibn Abi Lubaba, on the authority of his father, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “It was the eve of `Aqaba or the eve of the Battle of Badr when The Holy Prophet, on whom be blessings and peace of Allah Almighty, spoke to those of the Ansar and the Muhajirin who were with him,

“How will you fight the unbelievers on the morrow?”

And `Asim Ibn Abi-al-Aflah said in answer to this, “O Messenger of Allah, first of all, we shall take up the bow and arrows; and if they have drawn close to us, up to two hundred cubits or around that distance, the shooting of a variety of bows begins ; and when they have drawn even closer, the shattering with stones, and when they have drawn yet closer within the reach of our lances, the play of lances begins until the lances are broken ; after that comes the contest of the swords, and this is the manner of battle, O Messenger of Allah.” Upon this The Holy Prophet, upon whom peace, said,

“Thus war is revealed to the people of faith.”

then he gave the command for it and said,

“He who engages in battle with the enemy, let him fight in the manner of Asim.”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

31 Upon which all (Traditions) are agreed

On the authority of Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqas, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said,
“The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, supplied me with arrows on the day of Uhud and The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said to me,

“Shoot, oh Sa’ad, may my father and mother be your ransom!”

also on this authority, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, he said, “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, did not join both his parents (in this turn of phrase) for anyone else before me, and I was the first to cast arrows at the unbelievers.”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

32 Related by Abu ash-Shaykh and al-Hakim

On the authority of Sa`d ibn Abi Waqqas, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said to me also on the day of Uhud,

“Oh Allah, guide his shot and grant his supplication”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

33 Chosen by al-Bukhari

On the authority of Salama bin al-Akwa’, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, that The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, stepped out to the people of Bani Aslam, while they were staging an archery competition in the marketplace, and he said to them,

“Shoot, ye sons of Isma’il! For verily, your forefather was an archer; and I am with the tribe of so-and-so.”

Thereupon they hesitated, and The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, asked,

“What is it with you?”

and they said, “How shall we shoot while you are with the tribe of so-and-so?” and The Holy Prophet, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, said,

“Go ahead, and shoot, for I am with all of you.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

34 Narrated by at-Tirmidhi
On the authority of Abu Hurayra, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah be upon him, spoke,

“No wager is permitted except with animals having soles (khuf or hooves – hafir) or with the casting of arrows (nasl).’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

35 Chosen by Abu ash-Shaykh

On the authority of Anas, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, said,

“Whoever acquires a bow in the way of Allah, from him Allah the exalted fends off poverty and need through its blessings.”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

36 Selected by at-Tabarani in his book `As-Saghir’

On the authority of A’isha, may Allah be well-pleased with her, who said, “The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,

“There is no harm for any of you to take up your bow when you are overtaken by care, and thereby do away with your worries.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

37 Chosen by Abu ash-Shaykh

On the authority of Abu Khirash, may Allah be well-pleased with him, who said, “I heard al-Qasim relate about The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, that he passed by some people shooting arrows with bows, and one of the Companions said, “I see that they have not yet prayed their obligatory prayers, which would be better than what they are doing,

O Messenger of Allah.” And the holy prophet, Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, then said,

“Their bows are better unless they miss the prayer time.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

38 Chosen by Abu ash-Shaykh

On the authority of Ibn `Umar, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with them both, who relates,

“The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, spoke,
“The angels witness three things:
the wager of the horse-race,
the shooting with the bow,
and the pleasantry of a man with his wife.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

39 Chosen by at-Tabarani
On the authority of Rafi` bin Khadij, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who related, that he went out on the day of Uhud, and The Messenger of Allah, may Allah Almighty bless him and grant him peace, wished him to return to Medina, for he thought him to be too young. But his uncle told The Holy Prophet, that Rafi’ was an archer and a teacher of archery, whereupon The Holy Prophet, on whom be blessings and peace from Allah Almighty, permitted him to come along.

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

40 On the authority of Salama bin al-Akwa’, may Allah Almighty be well-pleased with him, who related, “I asked The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings from Allah Almighty be upon him, about the permissibility of praying with the bow and the leather quiver: was this permissible or not?” The Holy Prophet, may Allah Almighty bless him and send him peace, replied,

“Pray with the bow but leave aside the leather quiver.’”

and the Messenger of Allah has spoken truly

15 Safar 1440

Tags archery, arrow, arrows, bow, bows, bukhari, effort, hadith, ismaeel, ismail, Ismail ibn nazir satia, Ismail satia, life, Muslim, quran and sunnah, religion, sports, steel, sunna, sunnah, sunnat, test, truth

Muslim women

I don’t wear a Hijab, but my heart is clean!”

Post author By Ismail ibn Nazir Satia
Post date 27 September 2018
No Comments on I don’t wear a Hijab, but my heart is clean!”

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

“All of my Ummah will be forgiven except those who sin openly…” [1]

Sinning privately is between Allah and His servant and a struggle that only He knows about and which In sha Allah He will give His servant the Tawfiq to repent for. Openly sinning with no remorse is tantamount to a public challenge to Allah and it doesn’t just remain between a servant and his Lord, but with the people too. One is to unashamedly disobey Allah and then to further justify the sin, but “Allah will not help a people until they help themselves.” [2]

Lately, I seem to have come across many sisters who give reasons for their Hijab – or lack thereof!

“I’m not ready for the Hijab yet!”
“So what if my hair is uncovered? My heart is clean!”
“Don’t tell me to wear Hijab, only Allah can judge me.”

Naturally, it led to many debates where not everyone agreed. Hence, this is merely an opinion.

At random, I started looking at other commandments of Allah. His order to fulfil the obligation of Salah comes with the condition that one has reached the age of puberty, is sane, and is a Muslim. Similarly, the donning of Hijab becomes compulsory once a woman reaches the age of puberty. But why are sisters so quick to make excuses like, “I’m not ready yet” and, “But my heart is clean,” when we don’t make the same excuses for our Zakah and fasting the month of Ramadhan?

My mind is at awe with the women around my Nabi ﷺ who dropped all they had in order to comply to another commandment of Allah with the hope of coming closer to Him. Fatimah Al-Zahrah (R), the queen of the women of Jannah, was the epitome of modesty at the time of Nabi ﷺ and continues to serve as an example until the end of time. Similarly, Umm Khallad (R) who upon hearing of the martyrdom of her beloved son on the battlefield, rushed to it whilst veiled. When asked how she managed to cover in such a state, she responded, “I have lost my son, but I have not lost my modesty.” [3]

Such women had the purest of hearts and yet they did not make the excuses we make because it is not befitting for a Muslim woman to ask for a concession in a matter that Allah and His Nabi (S) have ordained for us!

It may be true that a sister without the Hijab may have a heart purer and Taqwa stronger than that of a sister fully covered. However, when a Muslim woman CHOOSES not to wear the Hijab out of her own free-will (without a valid Shar’i reason), she becomes another fallen brick in the wall that divides us as an Ummah because she has chosen to hide her identity. Those who wear the Hijab (despite their struggles) are then labelled fanatics and extremists because another side has presented a “liberal” image which shows the world that it clearly isn’t mandatory to wear the Hijab and it can’t really be part of the faith! And so in this manner, she makes it harder for her “Hijabi” sister to practice her faith.

Those who refuse the Hijab claiming only Allah can judge them, remember that indeed Allah WILL judge them. Let’s help one another to become stronger in our faith and show the world that we are proud of our identity. May Allah help each of us in our struggles and only He knows what they are.

Do you agree? Disagree? All comments welcome, but please be courteous. plain-chiffon-hijab-plain-chiffon-charcoal-hijab-1_large

[1] Bukhari and Muslim
[2] Surah Ra’ad (13:11)
[3] Abu Dawud

Zainab Bint Husain (Allah protect her)

10 Muharram 1440

Tags Allah, bint husain, bukhari, clean, clean heart, God, heart, hijaab, hijab, jummah, Muslim, nikab, niqab, one ummah, only GOd judge can me, only God will judge me, pardah, people, prayer, scarf, sin, sin openly, test, truth, ummah, zainab

Spirituality

Patience

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

We should all prepare a place in our hearts and minds where we can accommodate all the current tragedies and then further disasters which will sooner or later come to our lives, but this is an economy that few people care to practice.

I’m not trying to be pessimistic. Our Prophet ﷺ was not seeking forgiveness all the time because he was a sinner, and neither did His Lord command him regularly to be patient because his entire life was a completely unrelenting tragedy.

It wasn’t.

But it would be a real tragedy for *us* if we were only to think that to be in a blessed state of humbling ourselves before Allah, or to be told to be patient, is only applicable when we are in a bad moment, or a rut in life, or a mid-life crisis.

Patience is realism. It is understanding that whatever we are experiencing at the moment – whether we perceive it to be good or bad – is all ultimately a test on whether you stay *real* or not, whether you correctly attribute the blessings you can and cannot see, to the One who gave them to you. And thank Him for them regardless.

That’s why being patient and worshipping your Lord in a consistent, deep, quality manner during your good times is far more difficult than in the bad times. You can’t see the problem. You can’t feel the grief you need to be patient with. The heart doesn’t feel enough pain to kick in the patience reflex. You don’t feel the need to thank Allah because things are so good “without Him”.

That’s why Shaykhul Islam Ibn Taymiyyah (Allah have peace on him) termed this type of patience the more challenging and the more rewarding. Think about it: the majority of the world’s population have failed in this type of patience. And worse, Allah tells us that He continues to bless them with the dunya and good times and that they’ll continue in their heedlessness and leave this life whilst actually being content with their disbelief.

That is why when we see those who have been blessed with so much in this life and yet they still preserve their values, their Deen, their thanks to their Creator, and their thanks and connection to the normal folks around them, then we still call this “patience” even though it may not seem so. And what do we say about this person? “He still keeps it *real*.” That’s why patience is a permanent state we must incorporate in our lives, and we must create that space where we are always alert and aware. As I said, patience is realism.

This is thus the development of patience. This is why anyone who truly understands patience, has truly understood Islam, reality, and life itself.

#ProtectThisHouse Shaykh Abu Eesa Niamatullah

سئل الإمام أحمد بن حنبل : ألم تصدك المحن عن الطريق ؟!

قال : والله لولا المحن ؛ لشككت في الطريق ..!

ان الله لا يبتليك بشيءٍ إلا كان خيراً لك .. وإن ظننت العكس ..!

أرح قلبك .. فلولا البلاء لكان يوسف مدللاً في حضن أبيه ..

ولكنه مع البلاء صار عزيز مصر ..!

ومن المنفى رجع موسى نبيا…!!!!

ورجع سيدنا محمد من المهجر سيد الخلق فاتحا..!!

أفيضيق صدرك بعد هذا ؟!

كونوا على يقين أن هناك شيءٌ جميلٍ ينتظركم بعد #الصبر

ليبهركم وينسيكم مرارة الألم

Imam Ahmed was once asked: ‘ did your trials not stop you from keeping steadfast on His ( Allah’) path? ‘

Imam Ahmed replied: ‘ if it were not for my trials I would have doubted this path, Allah only tests us with what’s good for us, even if we think otherwise’.

Put your heart at ease… if it were not for trials Prophet Yusuf AS would have been spoilt in the arms of his father but his trials made him the Chief of Egypt!

And out of exile musa AS returned a Prophet!

And Prophet Muhammed return from Hijrah a messenger to the whole of creation, opening Mecca and many other cities.

Never have doubt that what befalls us maybe better for us and what never doubt that something beautiful awaits with patience….

( Mini Mission Reminders )

Tags allaah, Allah, God, hearts, mind, patience, prophet, test, tests, trials

Poems

Straight Talk!

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

So, you reckon Allah will understand?

And not give you a reprimand?

How on earth can you even think that at all?!

Surely, you can see Shaytan’s setting you up for a fall.

Don’t you remember Hadhrat Abu Bakr RA talking of Judgement Day?

He had hope and fear and knew it could go either way.

And here is foolish you,

Simply relying on Allah’s mercy to get you through.

How you can be so stupid I really don’t know!

But one thing of which I am quite sure,

Is that if you’d paid thousands for a prosthetic arm,

I bet my bottom dollar you’d let it come to no harm.

Despite the fact that it would never be,

As good as the real thing given to you and me.

So WHY ain’t you looking after this gift given to you free of charge,

It’s been made-to-measure just for you – not too little or too large.

By the one who loves you more than you love Him,

And thats how you show gratitude by acting on a whim!

You need to wake up before its too late,

Break the cycle now before it turns into self hate.

Do you remember when to you someone once said,

(And it was also summat that you read)

That Shaytan only frequents those from whom he can steal a precious jewel.

Just stop and think, don’t you reckon that’s so cool?

That means that somewhere within you,

And I know you find this hard to believe but its true.

You’ve got summat that Shaytan reckons is worth nicking,

Are you really gonna let him take it without giving him a good kicking???

To hear your answer as a firm no – is good,

Because that is the attitude that you should

Have in order to get far in life,

Remember its all about struggle and strife.

There will be highs and there will be lows,

That’s Shaytans way of keeping you on your toes.

Just stay alert and on the ball,

Keep strengthening your mental wall.

Take each day as it comes and you’re sure to be fine,

Ask for Allah’s help and then go out there and shine.

All the best!

Where there’s a will there’s a way…

Anonymous

Tags give up, islam, Muslim, nafs, poem, shackles, Shaytan, test, trap, try harder, web, will power

Marriage

WORLD WAR III: Mother-In-Law VS Daughter-In-Law

Post author By Ismail ibn Nazir Satia
Post date 15 January 2018
No Comments on WORLD WAR III: Mother-In-Law VS Daughter-In-Law

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

“I am not perfect. Let’s both assume that the other is doing the best she can.”

Mother-In-Law-Heart Weddings are usually such happy occasions, full of love and hope for the future of the bride and groom. As wonderful as it can be, it can also mean mother-in-law problems. Something happens the moment a bride says, “I accept him.” Not only does she get a husband, but in most cases, a mother-in-law as well.

But far too many women describe this relationship as fragile, tense, and even competitive.

It’s no secret that in-laws are the subject of many marital arguments. The rivalry between wives and their mothers-in-law is a major source of tension in many marriages. You may find it interesting that many new brides get along very well with their husband’s parents at first; it isn’t until later—sometimes years later—that friction develops.

Time-after-time, daughters-in-law say things like, “My husband’s parents welcomed me into their family immediately and treated me as their own daughter.” Likewise, “My own in-laws showered me with gifts and included me in everything”. It’s not uncommon for young women to be very fond of their husband’s family, and vice versa… in the beginning.

Later on down the marriage, dealing with in-laws can be an overwhelming challenge—whether you are dealing with an overbearing mother-in-law who believes her opinions are superior to yours—or someone who tries to make you feel guilty whenever your needs conflict with hers. It may be tempting to gossip, hold silent grudges, or cut off all communication with troublesome in-laws – but that often just adds to the problem.

Mother-in-law problems can be one of the biggest issues in an engaged or married couple’s life. In some cases, they’re really more like out-laws. Some mother-in-laws have a way of letting everyone know their displeasure with the new family member over issues big and small – and yet seem to forget their own son or daughter can think or speak for themselves, and in most cases, should.

Why is it that the mother-in-law relationship can be so difficult? When you think about it, it really shouldn’t be. You have so many meaningful things in common: love for the same person, wanting what’s best for that person, and for them to be happy. For some though, it’s these same things that make for fast adversaries.

Some mother-in-law problems arise out of a competition for the attention of the adult child. Because they are now spending all of their time with their new spouse, there may not seem to be room enough for mum, which can be seen as not loving them as much anymore. When they visit mum, of course your spouse is going to take you with them – you’re now a package deal. Mother-in-law’s can be very resentful of having to share time and space with someone else.

Who would know what’s best for their kids better than a mother? As adults, however, we know what’s best for ourselves, not our mum. Some mothers, however, feel that they should reign supreme over our lives – even when we’re 45-years-old. It can be a hard habit for parents to break and some never feel compelled to stop parenting, even adult children. What makes that more difficult is that some of us don’t know how to let our mothers know that we are now adults who think for ourselves.

No one wants or needs their mother-in-law (or future one) telling them what’s best for their partner or worse, guilt-tripping them because of some imaginary slight or that they don’t measure up to her expectations. Big or small, whatever the issue may be, if she can’t refrain from commenting or speaking out inappropriately, it’s up to our spouse to talk to her. This can be difficult for our partners since for some it can seem unthinkable to speak out “against” their mother and be independent.

mother-in-law-problems

Advice for mother-in-laws:

Pray for your daughter in law, rather than prey on her. Hope and pray that the marriage of your son will be successful. Don’t sit in the background and hope for your daughter-in-law to fail. Ask Allah to show you how to love your daughter-in-law as your own daughter.
Try to be understanding more than criticising. Ask questions to understand. Don’t tell your daughter-in-law how things should be. Don’t expect your son to do what you want him to do anymore. Expect and encourage him to consult with his wife. Rather than question or criticize your daughter-in-law, speak to her and reason with her.
Compliment your daughter-in-law; never complain about her. Honour your daughter-in-law in the presence of your son. Compliment your daughter-in-law; never complain. Make an effort to applaud, praise, and thank your daughter-in-law. Tell her how much you appreciate her positive influence on your son and why you think she’s a good mother. Your daughter-in-law may be different from you. Accept her for who she is. Realise that your daughter-in-law wasn’t raised the same way you raised your son and maybe doesn’t have the same standards you have. Perhaps she is from a different family or caste or race…Try to understand her mind set and the way her family operated. Do not try to change her into who you would like her to be.
Act like a family, fight like a family, not an enemy. Encourage your son to build, develop, and define his marriage role. Don’t fight for position by grasping and grabbing for your son’s time and emotions. Good mums want their kids to have good marriages. If you are a family, act like one. Families fight, they discuss their issues and that’s how they get resolved. This can be done lovingly and constructively, not destructively! It doesn’t have to be a he said/she said/you said situation. Tiptoeing around the problems and acting like they don’t exist doesn’t help anyone, it only hurts everyone in the long run. Ask your daughter-in-law to let you know if/when you offend her. Remember that Shaytan wants to destroy your relationship.
Your son isn’t perfect, not before marriage and certainly not after. Remember that your son has always had faults. Your child was not perfect before she married him. You love your son, so does your daughter-in-law. Every change that you see in your son is not her doing. Every change that you see in your son is not her doing.

A good mother-in-law doesn’t make the wife feel like she doesn’t measure up, or give the impression that she wishes her son would have made a ‘better’ choice. A good mother-in-law encourages, accepts, and loves unconditionally. Allow your daughter-in-law to disagree and know that it isn’t something personal. Don’t be offended if a daughter-in-law does not share your tastes, dreams, and values. Tell her about decisions you faced as a mother of infants, toddlers, teenagers, young adults, etc. Talk about more than superficial things. Get to know her for the person Allah created her to be. Then, come alongside her to mentor, encourage, and build a relationship so that if/when you need to give loving input or direction, it is not taken as meddling. Express your gratitude towards her: “You truly are the wind beneath my son’s sails and I really appreciate and love you. You understand my son far better than I do, and I thank Allah for you.” “I’ve got the best daughter-in-law God could give. I am so blessed.” Finally, offer to take care of the grandkids so your daughter-in-law can have a day to herself.

Okay, mothers-in-law, there’s the list. What are we going to do about it?

daughter-in-law-quote-3-picture-quote-1

The second year of my son’s marriage, he and his wife had Thanksgiving with us. My daughter-in-law made a delicious sweet potato casserole. My mother and I complemented her on it and asked for the recipe. “It’s a family recipe,” my daughter-in-law said. “So I don’t give it out.” —Anonymous mother-in-law

Whoa! I had thought that daughters-in-law were the ones with the in-law stories. Well, apparently mothers-in-law have their share of stories, too.

One mother-in-law wrote something that brought back memories. “That little boy that brought me dandelions and messy hugs,” she said, “is now a grown man with a family of his own. I need to fully release him so he is allowed to change and adapt to his wife and adult life. I don’t want to be a parent who says or does things that grate in the mind of my daughter-in-law. She is the one who knows my son best now.”

Yes, a mom relinquishes her title of “first lady” in her son’s life on his wedding day. Perhaps that’s why some have described the relationship between a mother- and daughter-in-law as fragile or tense. Allah certainly didn’t intend it to be that way.

Advice for daughter-in-laws:

She is still his mother, she gave birth to him. Even though you are the woman in her son’s life now, be considerate of the fact that she used to be the woman in his life. The most important thing that you can do for your mother-in-law is to love her son unconditionally…You’ve now taken the spot as her son’s biggest
Respect her for who she is, think of her as your own mother. Don’t try to change your mother -in-law. Accept her eccentricities. Realise that she may do things differently in her home, try to understand her ways. Especially, if you live with them. Bear in mind her age, think of your elderly parents.

Do not assume things, rather ask and clarify. If I have offended you, I may not know this. You have the freedom to say to me, nicely, ‘Remember when you said ______. Did you mean _____?’ I am not perfect. Let’s both assume that the other is doing the best she can. Don’t judge, there are two sides to any story.
Remember, you are family and not foes! Ring your mother-in-law off your phone not your son’s phone. Take her out, just the two of you. Go shopping! Discover what you have in common. Keep your in-laws informed of their grandchildren, don’t deprive them.
Express gratitude, not a bad attitude! Post on your Facebook page: ‘I am thankful for my mother-in-law! I am so grateful for our great relationship. It is so important! And ever since I got married our relationship has become so natural and I love spending time with her!’ Please take time to express your appreciation for a gift by writing a note or calling just to say, ‘Thanks!’ If she or any of your in-laws visit you welcome them in with a smile, prepare something special for them. Show your happiness, don’t block yourself from them.

Some mothers- and daughters-in-law form close friendships very quickly. For others, this may take years. But most mothers- and daughters-in-law do want to connect with each other. They want to find common ground. They want to know each other as individual women with feelings, beliefs, and ideas. Do not fight your mother-in-law over your husband and same to the mother-in-law over your son. If the daughter-in-law cooks something or buys something for her husband, please do not compete with her for praises.

mil

Tags bad, complain, content, daughter in law, dil, evil, fil, good, hadith, happy, happy couples, happy life, hate, in law, in laws, marriage, mil, miserable, monster in law, mother in law, Muslim, nikah, Qur'an, sad, sil, test, war, wedding, world war 3, world war III

Muslim men Muslim women

Changing Perspective

Bismillah,

We often believe that being tested and going through problems in our life is due to our sins. Makkah Rihaal

Sayyidah Aminah (Allah have mercy on her) lost ‘Abdulllah (Allah have mercy on him) when she was just 18. Our master Muhammad, ﷺ the sinless and pure lost his father, mother and grandfather by 8. Hasan (Allah have mercy on him) and Husayn (Allah have mercy on him) lost Lady Fatima (Allah have mercy on her) when they were 7 and 8; Sayyiduna ‘Uthman (Allah have mercy on him) buried 2 of his wives. Sayyida Khadijah (Allah have mercy on him) lost 3 infant sons her in lifetime. Lady ‘A’isha (Allah have mercy on her) lived off dates and water because there was nothing in the house. Mus’ab ibn ‘Umayr (Allah have mercy on him) was disowned by his parents as a youth. Abu Hurayra (Allah have mercy on him) didn’t owe a single thing, would tie stones to his stomach, and couldn’t sleep at night due to severe hunger. Bilal (Allah have mercy on him) was beaten and abused because of his faith. Prophet Yusuf عليه السلام was wrongly accused by a woman and he was locked up. Prophet Musa عليه السلام was separated from his mother as a baby. Prophet Nuh’s عليه السلام son rejected him. Prophet Lut’s عليه السلام wife denied him. Prophet Ibrahim عليه السلام didn’t have kids until old age. Prophet Ayyub was tested with illness.

Trust me, your test is just a living proof of how much Allah loves you.

You’re not married and people think something is wrong with you. You’re raising a child alone and people totally overlook you. You’ve been divorced and people look down upon you. You’re over 25 and people think you’re too old. You’re a widow and no one ever thinks your good enough.

Rabi’a al-Adawiyya (Allah have mercy on her) never married and she is considered one of the greatest saints of this Ummah. Lady Maryam (Allah have mercy on her) never got married and she is from the 4 greatest women Allah ever created. Sayyiduna ‘Isa عليه السلام ascended to heaven and he was unmarried, yet he is a Prophet.

Lady Hajar (Allah have mercy upon her) nurtured Prophet Isma’il عليه السلام in Makkah alone whilst it was a barren desert, due to the command of Allāh. Sayyidah Aminah (Allah be pleased with her) lost her husband before our master Muhammad ﷺ was born. The Prophet’s ﷺ wife, Lady Safiyyah (Allah be pleased with her) had been divorced and then widowed before he married her. Lady Khadijah (Allah be pleased with her) had 2 children from previous marriages and was 40 years old when he married her. Lady A’ishah (Allah be pleased with her) had no children. Lady Asiya (Allah be pleased with her) was married to the greatest tyrant, Fir’awn. Our communities looks down upon people and judge, yet it is strange that some of the greatest men and women Allāh ever created and made role models for us had come from such circumstances and situations. Never feel inferior or unimportant. Don’t listen to their opinions and meaningless words. Be content with the Decree of Allāh Azza wa Jallah. Raise your head and be proud.

Shaykh Muhammad Aslam,

Graduate of Fath al-Islami (Damascus)
Founder of City of Knowledge & Prophet of Change, Isyllabus Tutor & International Speaker.

Enquiries For Lectures: Info@CityofKnowledge.co.uk
Questions For FB Live:Questions@ProphetOfChange.com

Tags Allah, islam, life, pain, problem, problems, suffering, test, trials