MARITAL ADVICE LISTS are common to find in Muslim literature and lectures, yet the information is almost always targeted towards women. However, we all know that it takes two to tango – and so here is a list aimed at Muslim husbands in the hopes that they, too, will benefit and be able to improve their relationships.
1. Have taqwa and iḥsân
Know that you are responsible for your end of the marriage, regardless of how the other party treats you. Fulfill your wife’s rights without demanding yours first, and know that you seek Allah’s Pleasure over anyone else’s. Do your job with excellence, and don’t make it conditional. Iḥsân is not merely to worship in the ritual sense, but to conduct oneself in general with an awareness that Allah is Al-Raqîb (the Ever-Watchful), and to fulfill one’s duties in the best of manners.
Then he (Jibrîl) said, “Inform me about iḥsân.” He (the Messenger of Allah) answered, “It is that you should serve Allah as though you could see Him, for though you cannot see Him yet (know that) He sees you.” (Muslim)
2. Respect her
Remember that Allah describes marriage as a bond of love and mercy – love ebbs and flows, but mercy and respect must always be there, even – especially – in times of conflict. Unfortunately, we tend to present respect as a quality that men need (“men need respect, women need affection”). The truth is, however, that one can love someone without respecting them… and this is very, very dangerous. To have mercy and respect one’s wife is to never assume that she exists merely as an extension of you or to serve your needs. To respect her is to honor her, to defend her from harm and others’ accusations, and to have husn al-ẓann of her.
In cases of disagreement, this respect translates as not forcing your own opinion upon her when there is Islamically acceptable room for differences of opinion.
It should go without saying, but unfortunately it bears repeating nonetheless – respecting your wife means never, ever, abusing her, physically or otherwise.
“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.” [Sûrat Al-Rûm, 30:21]
Even in times of conflict, Allah tells us to behave in the most respectful and gracious of manners:
And do not forget graciousness between you. [Sûrat Al-Baqarah, 2:237]
Abû Mûsa Al-Ashʿari (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:
I asked the Messenger of Allah: “Who is the most excellent among the Muslims?” He said, “One from whose tongue and hands the other Muslims are secure.”[1]
3. Be emotionally intelligent
Empathy, being attuned to the other person’s preferences, learning to understand their personality and responding appropriately without expecting to change them into something they’re not… supporting and respecting each other as both individuals and as a team. The Prophet ﷺ was an emotionally intelligent husband, who knew the differences in his wives’ personalities and interacted with them in a manner best suited to each woman. He comforted Ṣufiyyah when she wept; he had spirited discussions with ʿÂishah (May Allah be pleased with her) and he encouraged Ḥafṣah’s (May Allah be pleased with her) for knowledge.
In a famous narration known as the Hadith of Abu Zarʿ(May Allah be pleased with him) [2] ʿAishah told the Prophet ﷺ the story of eleven women who sat together and described their husbands’ qualities and behaviours. The eleventh woman, Umm Zarʿ, described Abû Zarʿas a man who was extremely generous to his wife, showering her with gifts; who went out of his way to please her; who never rebuked her or verbally abused her; who made sure that she was comfortable and satisfied. To Umm Zarʿ, there was no greater husband than Abû Zarʿ- and the Prophet ﷺ himself told ʿÂishah, I am to you as Abû Zarʿwas to Umm Zarʿ, except that I will never divorce you.
4. Be a True Qawwâm
Know that being a qawwâm is a matter of being a good leader – not authoritarian or a dictator, but someone who inspires love and respect, who treats others with dignity and respect… The popular book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is a great resource for understanding what good leadership is. There are several excellent Islamic resources discussing leadership lessons from the life of the Prophet ﷺ. [3][4] Strive to embody the Sunnah in your character, not just in how many rakʿahs a day you pray.
ʿÂishah RA described the Prophet thus: “His character was the Quran.”[5] Be the type of husband that a wife describes in such a manner.
Remember that as a qawwâm, you are responsible and accountable for the well-being of your household and those under your care.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The amîr (ruler) who is over the people is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock; a man is a shepherd in charge of the inhabitants of his household and he is responsible for his flock…”[6]
5. Be friends before you become spouses
That might sound odd (or not) – but we often put so much pressure on ourselves to fulfill a role (husband/wife), that we forget to get to know each other as friends first. Every marriage will go through ups and downs, intimately and otherwise… and you’ll be surprised to realize how much having a solid, sincere friendship can pull you through the hard times.
One example of RasûlAllah’s “friendship” with his wives is his relationship with Sawdah bint Zamʿah RA. She was the first woman whom he married after the death of Khadijah, and although she was considered to be elderly and not as beautiful as the other women whom he would later marry, their relationship was one of camaraderie, confidence, and laughter. [7]
6. Don’t be embarrassed or ignorant of female biology
Learn about it – from menstruation to female sexuality to pregnancy and everything else. You need to know this stuff – it will impact your life significantly, intimately and otherwise. Don’t laugh it off or act as though it’s not worth your time and attention. Women’s health is sorely misunderstood, and having a disinterested (or worse, disgusted) husband can make things even more difficult for women.
The Prophet ﷺ did not shy away from these matters, either as a husband or as a Messenger of Allah. Instead, he constantly enjoined men to be aware of and sensitive to their wives’ needs – just as he was with his wives.
Narrated Umm Salamah RA:
While I was laying with the Prophet ﷺ under a single woolen sheet, I got the menses. I slipped away and put on the clothes for menses. He said, “Have you got “nifâs” (menses)?” I replied, “Yes.” He then called me and made me lie with him under the same sheet.[8]
7. Be responsible
Being “a good Muslim husband” doesn’t just mean fulfilling the basic rights as a husband and leaving it at that. Being a good Muslim husband means that you are on the ball as a responsible adult – whether it’s paying the bills, taking out the trash, cleaning a mess in the house, or being an engaged father (not ‘babysitting’). Doing these things is not a “kindness to the wife,” or “helping out at home.” It’s not “extra credit” and deserving of lavish praise. It is part and parcel of being a grown man responsible for his surroundings, his family, and himself. Do these things out of mindfulness that Allah will never waste your efforts for His Sake.
Narrated Al-Aswad RA:
I asked ʿÂishah what did the Prophet use to do at home. She replied. “He used to keep himself busy serving his family and when it was time for the prayer, he would get up for prayer.” (Bukhâri)
ʿÂishah RA reported:
I was asked, “What did the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, do in his house?” I said, “The Prophet was a man among men. He would remove fleas from his clothes, milk his sheep, and serve himself.” (Musnad Ahmad 25662)
8. Don’t pursue your nawâfil at the expense of your wife’s farâ’iḍ
One issue that many men fall into is that in their zeal to engage more in ʿibâda, they end up burdening their wives even more – to the extent that she is barely able to pray her five ṣalawât with khushûʿ. Both spouses should encourage and facilitate opportunities for each other to strengthen as Muslims, but mothers of young children especially need their husbands to step up so that they can have the necessary time they need to reconnect with Allah and flourish spiritually. (And no, that doesn’t just mean five minutes here and there.)
Ramadan is a time when this becomes more obvious than ever – for example, many men will go to Ṣalat Al-Ṭarâwîḥ while leaving their wives to deal with the children, in addition to having cooked ifṭâr beforehand. On a daily basis, though, go out of your way to facilitate your wife’s ʿibâda and spiritual connection.
Narrated Abû Juḥaifah RA:
The Prophet ﷺ made a bond of brotherhood between Salmân Al-Fârisi RA and Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA. Salmân RA paid a visit to Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA and found Umm Al-Dardâ’ RA dressed in shabby clothes and asked her why she was in that state. She replied, “Your brother Abû Al-Dardâ’ R is not interested in (the luxuries of) this world.”
In the meantime Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA came and prepared a meal for Salmân RA. Salmân RA requested Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA to eat (with him), but Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA said, “I am fasting.” Salmân RA said, “I am not going to eat unless you eat.”
So, Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA ate (with Salmân). When it was night and (a part of the night had passed), Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA got up (to offer the night prayer), but Salmân RA told him to sleep and Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA slept.
After sometime Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA again got up but Salmân RA told him to sleep. When it was the last hours of the night, Salmân RA told him to get up then, and both of them offered the prayer.
Salmân RA told Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA, “Your Lord has a right on you, your soul has a right on you, and your family has a right on you; so you should give the rights of all those who has a right on you.”
Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA came to the Prophet ﷺ and narrated the whole story. The Prophet ﷺ said, “Salmân RA has spoken the truth.”[9]
9. Learn conflict resolution skills
One big reason that couples end up going to Shuyûkh for counseling is because they simply haven’t learned how to communicate and resolve conflicts in a healthy manner. It’s not even about one specific issue or another; it’s about learning how to deal with whatever issues arise, in the most respectful and appropriate manner possible. [10]
The Quran and Sunnah urge positive reconciliation between believers, and especially between husbands and wives.
“And live with them honourably. For if you dislike them – perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.”[Sûrat Al-Nisâ’, 4:19]
“And if a woman fears from her husband contempt or evasion, there is no sin upon them if they make terms of settlement between them – and settlement is best. And present in [human] souls is stinginess. But if you do good and fear Allah – then indeed Allah is ever with what you do, Acquainted.” [Sûrat Al-Nisâ’, 4:128]
10. Love your wife for who she is
Not because she’s the person who cooks for you or does your laundry. Not because she’s the mother of your child(ren). Not because you’ve settled into routine and you feel comfortable having her around and she knows how to work the coffee maker and where the family’s paperwork is filed. Love her for her. Her personality traits, her talents, her hobbies, the things about her that make her unique.
Notice them, appreciate them, compliment them. Let her know that you don’t just see her as wife or mother, but as an individual on her own. Know that long before she married you, indeed long before she was born to her own parents, she was created as a separate soul – a human being whose primary identity is as a slave of Allah.
And most importantly – let her know that you love her, with all the pride and openness that RasûlAllah ﷺ demonstrated when he was asked, “Who do you love most?” and he responded, simply and beautifully, “ʿÂishah.” [11]
There are of course numerous other pieces of advice that can be dispensed on the topic – everything from giving gifts to resolving in-law issues to arranging date-nights and so on. However, more important than specific behaviours are the principles behind them – and it these principles which have been highlighted.
In short, Muslim men should strive to match the standards set by RasûlAllah ﷺ when he said:
“The best of you are those who are the best to their wives, and I am the best of you to my wives.”[12]
Zainab bint Younus is a Canadian Muslimah who has been active in grassroots da’wah and writing about Islam and the Ummah for the last nine years. She was first published in al-Ameen Newspaper (Vancouver, Canada) at the age of 14, became a co-founder, editor, and writer for MuslimMatters.org at 16; and began writing regularly for SISTERS Magazine at the age of 19 until today. She also blogs regularly at The Salafi Feminist
Allah intends for you ease and does not intend for you hardship (2:185)
The Rihal on the motorway, which indicates you have entered Makkah
Alhumdu Lillah, I have just returned from my trip to Umrah for the month of Ramadhan. As always an amazing, joyous, marvellous and memorable experience! I thought I would pen down some of my thoughts and recollect my memories and experiences as guidance and advice for the benefit of the Ummah, in sha Allah. Many of the pieces of advice can be used for Hajj as well, as you will read in sha Allah. A wise man once said, “The best gift you can present to someone is good advice.” Feel free to add comments below and make any corrections, I am no expert of Hajj/Umrah or of the Haramayn. This is not a guide to Hajj/Umrah, it is just advice which I feel will help you and lighten your burden hopefully. And there is some fiqh/masail, because I feel knowledge is extremely important, especially in Hajj and Umrah.
Travelling and Hardship
عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ “ السَّفَرُ قِطْعَةٌ مِنَ الْعَذَابِ يَمْنَعُ أَحَدَكُمْ نَوْمَهُ وَطَعَامَهُ وَشَرَابَهُ فَإِذَا قَضَى أَحَدُكُمْ نَهْمَتَهُ مِنْ
وَجْهِهِ فَلْيُعَجِّلْ إِلَى أَهْلِهِ
From Abu Hurayrah (Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “Travelling is a portion of the torment. It denies you your sleep, food, and drink. When you have accomplished your purpose, you should hurry back to your family.” (Muwatta Malik).
Normally, we are in our daily routine, we do the same thing every day. We do not realise things about ourselves, our habits and temperaments etc. When we travel on a journey, especially with others these habits come out. As we can see from the above Hadith, travelling deprives us of our food, sleep and drink etc. We all know what happens when we take a man’s sleep or food away. The quote of Umar (Allah be pleased with him) is famous, how you truly know a person once you have travelled with him.
Umar (Allah be pleased with him) asked about a man who had given testimony, wanting to find out whether anyone could vouch for him. A man said to him: “I will vouch for him, O’ Ameer al-Mumineen, ‘Umar asked, “Are you his neighbour?” He said, “No.” He then” asked, “Did you mix with him for a day and come to know his character?” He said, “No.” He asked next: “Did you travel with him, for travelling and being away from home reveal a man’s true essence?” He said, “No.” ‘Umar said, “Perhaps you saw him in the-mosque, standing, sitting and praying?” He said, “Yes.” ‘Umar said, Go away, for you do not know him.”
Source: ‘Umar ibn al-Khattab His life and times (‘Umar ibn al-Khattab shakhsiyatuhu wa ‘asruhu), Volume 1, page 272-273 Written by Dr. ‘Ali Muhammad as-Sallabi, Translated by Nasiruddin al-Khattab
A very profound saying, when travelling with others, especially in a group, our true colours are revealed through our conduct as:
Much patience is required because people desire & think differently.
Whilst we should neither keep others waiting nor impose our views on the rest, we should be prepared to be delayed by others as that is part of group travel.
We should be ready to serve the rest.
We should abstain from petty complaints.
We must be considerate of others esp. the weak, the elderly & children.
Pray the Travel/Safar Duas and memorise them for the plane and coaches etc.
My advice first and foremost is to select your companions carefully and wisely. He/she should be smart, decisive and sharp. The journey is a blessed one but not an easy one, I like to give a true picture and not make it sound like a walk in the park. At times you have to make difficult decisions on the spot, a good companion will help at such times. People reading this blog will be from different spheres of life, some may never have travelled abroad before. Or they have travelled, but not to Haramayn Shareefayn. It is not like a visit to the local mosque, where you have 200-300 people praying. Brace yourself! You can get pushed in Salah, and knocked about in Tawaf, it can be extremely hot, things go missing and your possessions can get stolen, which I will elaborate on later. Going to such a beautiful and holy place with the wrong companions can sometimes make the whole journey a tedious and terrible one. This is why I have inserted the quote of Umar (Allah be pleased with him) above. Even if they are family members or relatives or old friends, travelling brings out a lot of “true” qualities in a person, Hajj and Umrah expose people to another level, be warned!
Allah tests us in different ways, the greater the trial the greater the reward. It was narrated from Mus’ab bin Sa’d RA that his father, Sa’d bin Abu Waqqas RA, said: “I said: ‘O Messenger of Allah ﷺ, which people are most severely tested?’ He said: ‘The Prophets ﷺ, then the next best and the next best. A person is tested according to his religious commitment. If he is steadfast in his religious commitment, he will be tested more severely, and if he is frail in his religious commitment, his test will be according to his commitment. Trials will continue to afflict a person until they leave him walking on the earth with no sin on him.’” (Ibn Majah)
Hadhrat Sahl Bin Sa’d (Radi Allahu Anhu) narrates that Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alayhi Wa Sallam) said: “Calmness in affairs is from Allah and haste in affairs is from shaytan.” (Tirmidhi)
No matter what happens, do NOT panic. There is always one “panic button” in the group, who makes a mountain of a molehill for every bit of drama. My advice when things go wrong is, “What is the worse that can happen?” Always analyse the situation, and don’t overreact. Remember, you are the guests of Allah, He SWT is the host, and He SWT will not let you down. You are in a different country, there are thousands of people, and the heat can get extreme at times as well. If problems arise or you fall ill, bear in mind your reward is with Allah. The more pain, the more reward.
Preparations
Be ready, mentally, physically, spiritually…
Makkah is the best place on earth and the most beloved to Allah and His Messenger ﷺ. At-Tirmidhi authentically reports in his Sunan (3925) from `Abdullah Ibn `Adiyy (Radi Allahu Anhu) that Allah’s Messenger ﷺ said whilst addressing Makkah: “By Allah! You are the best of the lands of Allah, and the best land of Allah to Allah! And were it not for the fact that I was expelled from you, I would never have left you.”
Rectify your intentions, you are going to Hajj/Umrah to please Allah and fulfil an obligation. Not to show off, therefore try staying off social media and taking pictures at every juncture. This leads to Riyaa (showing off) which is Haraam in Islam and spoils the whole journey. I will talk about photography later on.
The Prophet ﷺ said: “What I fear for you the most is the minor shirk, that is al-Riya (showing off). Allah will say on the Day of Judgement when He is rewarding the people for their actions: Go to those for whom you did Riya for in the world then see if you find the reward with them.” [Related by Ahmad (5/428, 429) and al-Baghawi in Sharh as-Sunnah (4135) from the hadith of Mahmud bin Lubayd, Radi Allahu Anhu, with an authentic chain upon the conditions of Muslim]
Repent from all sins, major and minor. Make a firm intention, when I return I will NEVER sin again. Pray your Qadha Salah or fulfil Qadha fasts beforehand. Remember, Huqooqul Ibaad (rights of servants) and Huqooqullah (rights of Allah). So the rights of servants are fulfilling debts, asking for forgiveness from people who you have hurt and offended etc. Do not merely say sorry, rather make it genuine and have a firm resolution never to hurt anyone again
Look for a reliable tour operator, don’t just ask one or two people. Do thorough research, check online and look at reviews etc. Find out exactly how far the hotels are from the Haram, rather than believe the standard “5 minutes.” See if you can get pictures of inside the hotel online, Mr Google is more useful than some of us can imagine. Ask what sort of food is served. On such a strenuous journey you need to eat well.
As Hajj/Umrah consist of a LOT of walking, whether it is Tawaf or walking to the Haram it is good to be prepared beforehand. Try walking a mile or two daily before you go for Hajj in sha Allah. You will see the benefits, especially for those who don’t exercise regularly.
I was given a list of things to take when I went to Hajj in 2012, Alhumdu Lillah – I have passed the same list to many friends and family over the years who have added and edited the list:
In addition to those above:
Small Qur’an (13 lines are not available in Haram)
Take spare dua books if you can (a few times in tawaf I was asked for books from other Hajis)
Recite Talbiyah as much as possible in the state of Ihram
On the way to Makkah keep reciting first kalimah (tayyibah), at least 1,000 times.
Virtues of Makkah
From the places of virtue that Allah has extolled and mentioned their excellence to the exclusion of others is the city of Makkah: the place of safety, and security, the place where revelation to the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ began, and from where he was appointed as the Messenger to mankind. It is the city which Allah swears by in the Qur’an:
لَا أُقْسِمُ بِهَٰذَا الْبَلَدِ “I swear by this city, Makkah”
وَأَنتَ حِلٌّ بِهَٰذَا الْبَلَدِ “And you, [O Muhammad], are free of restriction in this city.” (Al-Balad: 1-2)
Imam Ibn Katheer (rahimahullah) said: This is an oath of Allah (the Most High) by Makkah “Umm al-Quraa” (the mother of all towns), due to the fact that living in it puts one in a state that indicates the greatness of the city itself wherein the people are in a state of Ihraam, living in a sanctity. Allah stated:
وَهَٰذَا الْبَلَدِ الْأَمِين “And by this city of security (Makkah).” (At-Teen: 3)
Within Makkah is the Ancient House (Al-Bayt Al-`Ateeq) for the worship of Allah alone. It was the first place of monotheistic worship built for mankind. Allah stated:
إِنَّ أَوَّلَ بَيْتٍ وُضِعَ لِلنَّاسِ لَلَّذِي بِبَكَّةَ مُبَارَكًا وَهُدًى لِّلْعَالَمِينَ “Verily, the first House of worship appointed for mankind was that at Bakkah (Makkah), full of blessing, and a guidance for all of creation.” (Aale `Imran: 96)
It the place from where Allah took His Prophet into the Heavens on the night of the Journey. Allah (Most High) said:
“Glorified and Exalted be He above all that they associate with Him who took His slave for a journey by night from Al-Masjid-al-Haraam (at Makkah) to the farthest mosque (in Jerusalem), the neighbourhood whereof We have blessed, in order that We might show him of Our signs. Verily, He is the All-Hearer, the All-Seer.” (Al-Israa: 1)
“There is no city on earth to which all the prophets, the angels, the holy messengers and all the pious servants of Allah, who reside in the heavens and on earth, including the jinn, flocked to, except Makkah.” (Sunan Ibn Majah)
“Around the Ka’bah lies the graves of three hundred prophets.” (Sahih Muslim/Bayhaqi)
“Anyone who falls ill in Makkah for one day, Allah renders his body and his flesh haram (forbidden) from the fire of Jahannam.” (Sahih Bukhari)
Tawaf/Ka’bah
Sayyiduna Abu Umamah (Radiyallahu’anhu) reports that Rasulullah ﷺ said: ‘The doors of the sky open and du’as are accepted on four occasions;
a) When the armies clash in war
b) When rain falls
c) At the time of iqamah [for salah]
d) When looking at the Ka’bah.’
(Al-Mu’jamul Kabir, Hadith: 7713 & 7719 & Sunanul Kubra of Bayhaqi, vol.3 pg.360 with a weak chain. Also see Majma’uz Zawaid, vol.10 pg.155, Nataijul Afkar, vol.1 pg.383-384, Al-Futuhatur Rabbaniyyah, vol.4 pg.369 & footnotes on Musannaf Ibn Abi Shaybah, Hadith: 19861) https://hadithanswers.com/duas-accepted-upon-seeng-the-kabah/
From this Hadith, Ulama deduce when your first sight falls on the Ka’bah your Duas are accepted. Try and find a good spot to sit/stand for a long time so you can make a lengthy Dua (please pray for me too). When walking in Masjid Haram for the first time keep your gaze low so it doesn’t fall on the Ka’bah, once you find a spot sit and make Dua.
Make dua seriously, not half-heartedly. There is a story of Hajjaj ibn Yusuf RH who saw a blind man making Dua in front of the Ka’bah, but he wasn’t paying attention in dua. Hajjaj said to him, “I am going for Tawaf, after seven rounds if your eye sight is not returned I will kill you!” The man panicked and started making Dua passionately and fervently like a man who is drowning! Before Hajjaj finished, the man’s eyesight was returned. Subhan’Allah!
Try to make sure your Ihram is tightly fastened, and use safety pins if necessary. Try not to let the bottom piece drag too low as people tend to step on it (which may lead to embarrassment!). Same for sisters, which is a bit more difficult as women tend to wear more loose clothing and it drags along the floor. But if someone steps on your abayah it can cause a lot of inconvenience especially if you wear the long abayahs from head to toe! All I can say is be careful because in Tawaf you are very close together especially in the Mataf (the area around the Ka’bah). Men should also, use a belt if necessary. Very handy to keep your money in as well.
I love a man with Gheerah/Ghayrat! But we also need common sense with Gheerah (protective jealousy), many men do Tawaf with their wife (ves)! And they form a ring around their womenfolk, which is all good and well, but you can’t do Tawaf right next to the Ka’bah and not expect anybody to push or touch your womenfolk (accidentally), it is sure to happen in those areas. Then some men go one step ahead and push and shove anyone who comes close to their wife/daughter. It is ridiculous! As I said, I admire their Ghayrat, but these couples need to do Tawaf on the outskirts of mataf or on the upper floors, where it is less busy! The Mother of Believers, ‘Ā’ishah (Allah be pleased with her) used to do ṭawāf in an area away from the men, and she did not touch the Black Stone or the Yemeni Corner if there was crowding. It was narrated that ‘Ata’ said:
‘Ā’ishah used to do ṭawāf far away from the men, not mixing with them.” A woman said: “O Mother of the Believers, let us go and touch the Black Stone!” She said: “Go yourself,” and she refused to go.
In my opinion, the best place for women to do ṭawāf is on the roof of the Masjid. Now it may seem like a big distance from far, but I promise you, all it takes is an hour and 10 minutes, to be precise, to complete a ṭawāf, walking at an average pace. Now the Shayṭān may play with your mind and make it seem like a lot. But then ask yourself this…don’t you easily, easily, walk an hour ten minutes in the shopping mall?
Tawaf starts from the area in line with Hajr Aswad (black stone), opposite the black stone there is a green light which can also be used to indicate where the Tawaf starts. In previous times there was a thin piece of marble which went all the way down the Mataf, this also indicated the start of Tawaf as it is good to be precise.
As far as I know, wheelchairs are not allowed in the Mataf for Tawaf. Apparently, now there are scooters available for Tawaf on certain floors.
You can read any form of Dhikr/Dua looking in a book or off by heart in Tawaf or even Qur’an and Surahs you know by heart. If you are reading from a book, it is safer to do Tawaf on the outside, as reading books slow people down. Which doesn’t help people behind you.
When people are on the last Tawaf (seventh one) they struggle to get out of the Tawaf congregation because it is choc a block, especially if you like to do Tawaf close to the Ka’bah. A good tip for you is, as you do the seventh Tawaf start walking out slowly i.e. do the seventh Tawaf on the outskirts of the Mataf. So as soon as you finish, kiss the Hajre Aswad then you can leave the Mataf and pray your two Rak’ahs for Tawaf. Also, stick out your hand as a gesture that you are leaving, not barge your way through as some people do.
Also, the correct method of kissing the Hajre Aswad is to kiss your palms not your fingers as people tend to do. (Women’s guide to Hajj and Umrah – Mufti Faruq Saheb)
The multazam (place of clinging) is the part of the Ka’bah that is between the Black Stone and the door of the Ka’bah. What is meant by iltizam (clinging) is when the supplicant (person making du’aa’) places his chest, face, forearms and palms against it and calls upon Allah saying whatever du’aa’ he wishes. Try not to push and hurt others, and leave room for women too at the Multazam.
There is no specific du’aa’ that the Muslim should say in that place. He can cling to the Multazam when he enters the Ka’bah (if it is easy for him to enter) or he may do that before performing the Farewell tawaaf (tawaaf al-wadaa’), or he may do it at any time he wants. He should not cause difficulty for other people by offering a lengthy du’aa’. Similarly, it is not permissible to crowd other people or annoy them in order to cling there. If he sees a space then he should say du’aa’. Otherwise, it is sufficient for him to say du’aa’ whilst circumambulating and when prostrating in prayer.
It was narrated that ‘Abd al-Rahman ibn Safwaan (Allah be pleased with him) said: “When the Messenger of Allah ﷺ conquered Makkah, I said: I will put on my garments, as my house was on the road, and I will wait and see what the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) does. So I went and I saw that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) had come out of the Ka’bah, he and his companions, and they were touching the House from the Door to the Black Stone. They had placed their cheeks against the House and the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was in the midst of them.” Narrated by Abu Dawood, 1898; Ahmad, 15124.
Ibn Abbas (Radiyallahu Anhu) narrates that he heard Rasulullah ﷺ say: “The Multazam is a place where duas are accepted. Whenever a person prays to Allah, at this spot, Allah grants his prayer”.[Al-Hisnul-Haseen, Musalsalaat, Virtues of Haj – page 111]
Multazam is that part which is situated between the black stone and the door of Ka’bah. Multazam comes from the Arabic word ‘Iltizaam’ which means ‘to cling on to something’ or ‘to be attached to something’. It is so called because a person should touch his body to this section and make dua.
Imam Abu Dawood reports that Ibn Abbas (Radiyallahu Anhu) would stand up straight here with chest and face against the Ka’bah, arms stretched out above the head, leaning against the Ka’bah. He then said: “I saw Rasulullah ﷺ doing this”.
Shaykh Zakariyya (Rahmatullahi Alayhi) writes: “It was a common experience of every Ustadh of the above Hadith, from my teacher (Hadhrat Maulana Khalil Ahmed Saharanpuri Rahmatullahi Alayhi) to Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam that they said: “I prayed at the Multazam in the above manner and my prayer was granted”. Shaykh RH writes: “This has also been my personal experience”.
Note: This dua at Multazam should not be made during the Tawaf, otherwise Tawaf will be affected. It is to be made after completion of Tawaf and preferably after praying two rakats Tahiyyatut-Tawaf.
Hasan Basri (Rahmatullahi Alayhi) wrote a letter to the people of Makkah Mukarramah informing them that there are fifteen places in the vicinity of Haram Shareef where duas are accepted (Mustajaab Places)
During Tawaf 2. At the Multazam 3. Under the Meezabur-Rahmah (the water sprout in Hateem, from where the rain water drops off from the roof of Ka’bah). 4. Inside Ka’bah Shareef 5. At the well of ZamZam (after drinking ZamZam) 6. On Safa 7. On Marwa 8. While walking between Safa & Marwa 9. At Maqaame Ibraheem 10. On the plain of Arafaat 11. At Muzdalifa 12. At Mina 13. 14. 15. At the time of pelting the three Shayaateens in Mina. [Narrated in Al-Hisnul-Haseen]
Shaykh Zakariyya (Rahmatullahi Alayhi) writes: “Some Ulama have added a few more e.g.”
– Inside the Mataaf (where Tawaf is made) – When one’s sight falls on the Ka’bah (especially the first time) – Inside the Hateem (the semi-circle around Ka’bah) – Between Rukne Yamami & Hujare Aswad
[Virtues of Hajj – Page 112]
Great precaution needs to be taken when going to kiss the Hajre Aswad, it is a great Sunnah but saving yourself from harming others is Fardh. The same applies to making Dua at the Multazam and going into the Hateeem. Brothers need to be fair to the women in these areas. We can’t just block them out. I wouldn’t advise women to try and kiss the Hajre Aswad during busy periods I saw one woman trying to kiss it in Ramadhan and her Hijab came off or got pulled off… Astaghfirullah! “Prevention is better than cure.” The Multazam area is between the door of the Ka’bah and Hajre Aswad. There is enough room for men AND women if we can be considerate, the same applies in the Hateem to pray Salah and make dua.
“For verily, anyone who touches the Hajre Aswad is cleansed of his sins just as he was on the day his mother gave birth to him.” (Musnad lmam Ahmad)
It helps to wear thin socks when doing Nafl Tawaf (not in Umrah) as it can help your heels, or the leather ankle ones available to buy in Makkah.
Thursday night, the Tawaf usually gets busier than normal. As local people come for Tawaf because of Jumuah
Women should not be praying loud in Tawaf. This year I saw a lady lead her group praying loud, whilst her group repeats after her. Women cannot be Imams! “Be not soft in speech, lest he in whose heart is a disease (of hypocrisy, or evil desire for adultery, etc.) should be moved with desire.”(Surah Al-Ahzab Ayah 32) Second is the Hadith found in “Sahih Bukhari” Narrated Abu Hurayrah (Allah be pleased with him)
‘The Prophet ﷺ said, “The saying ‘Subhan Allah’ is for men and clapping is for women.” (If something happens in the prayer, the men can invite the attention of the Imam by saying “Subhan Allah”. And women, by clapping their hands). Sahih Al-Bukhari Vol #2, Book #22, Hadith #295.
Support for this can be found in the book of Al-Hafidh Ibn Hajar Al-Asqalani “Bulugh Al-Maram” in the tafseer of this Hadith it mentions the clapping is for women because the men should not hear the woman’s voice. (Bulugh Al-Maram: Arabic/English Page # 81 Hadith # 174)
Etiquette of the Masjid/Haram
Avoid sin
The companions Umar (Allah be pleased with him) and Abdullah Ibn Abbas (Allah be pleased with him) would say, “I would prefer to commit seventy sins in Rukyah (a place outside Makkah) than commit a single sin in Makkah.”(Kanzul Ummal)
The evidence of Shari`ah (Islamic Law) indicates that good deeds are multiplied in honourable times, such as Ramadhan, and the first ten days of Dhul-Hijjah, and places like the Two Sacred Masjids (Mosques). They are highly rewarded in Makkah and Al-Madinah, as it is reported in the authentic Hadith that the Prophet ﷺ said: “One Salah (Prayer) in my Masjid (mosque) [i.e. Al-Masjid Al-Nabawy (the Prophet’s Mosque in Madinah)] is better than thousand Salahs in any other Masjid, except Al-Masjid Al-Haram (the Sacred Mosque in Makkah). And one Salah in Al-Masjid Al-Haram is better than hundred thousand Salahs in my Masjid.” (Related by Ahmad and Ibn Hibban through an authentic Isnad [chain of transmission])
Many people tend to leave things in the saff/rows for Salah to reserve their place. This is incorrect. Please see the fatwa below:
Question: What is the ruling regarding reserving one’s position in the front saff between 2 Salahs with one’s scarf, hat or any other item?
Answer:
Assalamu Alaikum,
The Masjid is the house of Allah and is open to all Muslims who come for Salaah. Whoever comes first and sits in a certain place, then he is deserving of that spot. The Fuqaha (jurist) have written that is Makrooh (reprehensible) for one to reserve a place for himself in the Masjid to perform Salaah on that spot. (Kitabul Fatawa vol. 3 pg. 115 – Al Fatawa Al Hindiya vol. 1 pg. 108).
Based on these explanations, it will not be proper (in fact, it will be reprehensible) for one to fix a spot in the first Saff by putting a scarf, hat etc. to reserve it for his own self. It should also be noted that it is Makrooh (reprehensible) for a person to ask another one to get up from his place (in the Masjid) and sit in that place. Abdullah Bin Umar (R.A) narrated that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) prohibited that one should make another get up from his place and then sit on it.
With respect to if a person was sitting on a spot and then left to attend to a need (to return) when he returns he will be more deserving of that spot. In this regard, Abu Hurairah (R.A) narrated that the Prophet (s.a.w) said, ‘If anyone gets up from his place of sitting and then returns to that spot, then he is more deserving of that spot.”(Abu Dawood – Kitabul Fatawa vol. 3 pg. 113)
Many women like to pray Salah next to men or directly behind them:
The Messenger ﷺ in which he said: “The best rows for men are the front ones and the worst are the back ones, and the best rows for women are the back ones and the worst are the front ones.”
The hadeeth quoted is saheeh, but according to the scholars it is to be interpreted in this manner, which is when there is no barrier between the men and women. But if they are screened from the men, then the best rows are the front ones and the worst ones are the back ones, just as is the case with men, and they have to complete the front rows first, then the next and so on, and close the gaps, just like men, because of the general meaning of the proven hadeeth from the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) concerning that. May Allah help us all to do that which He loves and which pleases Him.
Walking in front of someone praying Salah
If you are in Tawaf it is okay to walk in front of someone praying Salah, other than that the ruling is the same i.e. you are not allowed to walk in front of someone praying Salah. I understand at time it can be difficult to get out, but we must still walk with precaution. As both the Masjids in the Haram are large Masjids, you can leave two rows in front of the one praying and cross over. But never walk directly in front of someone praying Salah if they are praying alone; Sunnah/Nafl.
This hadeeth – i.e., the hadeeth narrated by al-Bukhari (487) and Muslim (505) from Abu Sa’eed al-Khudri (Radiyallahu Anhu) says “If any one of you is praying, he should not let anyone pass in front of him. Let him push him away as much as he can, and if he insists then let him fight him, for he is nothing but a shaytan (devil)” – indicates that it is makrooh to pass in front of a person who is praying if he is praying on his own and without a sutrah. The same ruling applies to the imam if he is praying without a sutrah. But with regard to the person who is praying behind the imam, it does not matter what passes in front of him, just as it does not matter what passes in front of the imam or person praying alone if it passes behind the sutrah. The sutrah of the imam is also the sutrah of those who are praying behind him.
We say this concerning the imam and the person who prays alone, because the Prophet ﷺ said, “If any one of you is praying…” According to the scholars, this means praying on his own, because of the hadeeth of Ibn ‘Abbas (Radiyallahu Anhu). Hence we say that the person who is praying behind the imaam does not have to push away the person who passes in front of him, because Ibn ‘Abbas (Radiyallahu Anhu) said: “I came along riding on a female donkey one day when I had just reached the age of puberty. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was leading the people in prayer in Mina, without any kind of wall in front of him. I passed in front of part of the row, then I got down and sent the donkey to graze, and joined the row, and no one rebuked me for that.” (al-Tamheed, 4/187)
Drink Zamzam and drink to your full, remember duas are accepted when drinking Zamzam so make dua EVERY time for yourself and for others (and please remember me). For further info on Zamzam click this.
Prophet ﷺ said: “The water of Zamzam is for whatever purpose it is drunk for.”(Reported by Ibn Maajah, 2/1018; see Al-Maqasid al-Hasanah by al-Sakhaawi, p. 359).
Photography is totally forbidden in the Masjid. Scholars have given a fatwa permitting video and photography for da’wah purposes and others have said digital images are okay. But the stronger and preferable view will always be to abstain from such things, as it can be a reason for a lack of sincerity and showing off on social media. Most of these actions lead to showing off, the Prophet warned us about this:
The Prophet ﷺ said: “Shall I not inform you of what I fear for you more than the Masih ad-Dajjal? It is the hidden shirk. It is when a man stands up for prayer, then beautifies his prayer for another to look at.” [Related by Ibn Majah (2604) from the hadith of Abu Sa’id al-Khudri, radiallahu ‘anhu. The hadith is hasan]
Are you going to Hajj for Allah or for Facebook friends?!
I was really strict this Ramadhan and I actually stood in the way of people taking photos (my Jihad against selfies!) because I received a talk from a scholar of Pakistan, Mufti MahmoodulHassan Shah Mas’oodi Saheb who said:
“Shaykh Abdul Rehman al-Huzayfi (hafdihahullah) – Imam of Masjid Nabwi SAW- gave a Khutbah after Dhuhr Salah (normally there are no Khutbahs after Salah, apart from Jumuah), he told the people to stop taking photographs in the Haram as this causes takleef/inconvenience to Allah SWT and his Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), you hurt the angels! Do you want to be cursed? I stand for Salah as the imam, you take your mobile phones out! The muaddhin gives adhan, you take your phone out! People were crying, it was a long Khutbah. After Asr Salah someone explained to us the reason for the Khutbah. He had a dream of the Imam of the Prophets, The beloved of Allah, The leader of creation ﷺ blessed me with his presence in a dream and informed me, “Tell people to stop taking photographs as it hurts me, it breaks my heart.”
Mufti Mahmood saheb explains the enemies of Islam hurt the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), but how can we as the Ummah of the Prophet ﷺ hurt him or cause him pain?
I was once with Dr Abdul Salam Saheb, who is my Shaykh from Pakistan. We were together in Madinah, we came out of the Masjid. Once we had walked a fair distance, an alim who was residing in Madinah said to my beloved Shaykh, “This place is blessed, beloved, very virtuous and lofty in status. But, many people come here then leave and their Iman leaves with them. Because of the sins they do and takleef they cause people.” Allah shows his pious servants and His friends such things through the eyes of the heart!
Now, ask yourself is social media and photography that important? It is like the iPhone is the new Qibla and Snapchat is the new Qur’an. People tend to look at them more, sadly. Please avoid taking a smartphone if there is no need.
Ismail ibn Nazir Satia (One who is in dire need of Allah’s forgiveness, mercy and pleasure)
By Shaykh-ul-Hadīth, Hadrat Mawlānā Muhammad Saleem Dhorat hafizahullāh
The month of Ramadān is full of blessings. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said:
And it is a month the first part [first ten days] of which is mercy, the middle part [middle ten days] is forgiveness and the last part [last ten days] is emancipation from the Fire (of Jahannam). (Ibn Khuzaymah)
Having passed through the first ten days of ‘mercy’, we find ourselves in the second ten days of ‘forgiveness’ and approaching the last ten days, wherein Allāh ta‘ālā emancipates His servants from the Fire of Jahannam. Now, we will find people with different mind-sets; some will count down the days in eager anticipation of ‘Īd after which they will not have to stay hungry and thirsty for long hours anymore; some will have spent the major part of Ramadān exerting much effort in devotion to Allāh ta‘ālā and thus feel that they can now relax in the last ten days as they have, in their opinion, carried out much ‘ibādah already; and some will not have done anything of note until now and feel that there is no point of doing anything in these remaining days.
All these mind-sets are incorrect, as the last ten days of Ramadān hold great significance and virtue over the first twenty days of Ramadān. One only needs to examine the conduct of Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam during the last ten days to understand their virtue.
The Conduct of Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam during the Last Ten Days
Sayyidah ‘Ā’ishah radhiyallāhu ‘anhā reports that when the last ten days of Ramadān would enter, Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam would tighten his waist belt, stay awake at night and awaken his family. (Al-Bukhārī)
In this hadīth, Sayyidah ‘Ā’ishah radhiyallāhu ‘anhā has mentioned three things:
1. Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam would tighten his waist belt, which refers to preparation for exerting himself in ‘ibādah.
2. Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam would stay awake throughout the nights of the last ten days of Ramadān and worship Allāh ta‘ālā.
3. Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam would awaken his family also for ‘ibādah and tahajjud so that they too can acquire the blessings of the blessed nights.
The fact that Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam would especially exert much effort in devotion during the last ten days of Ramadān, shows the virtue and significance of these last ten days. And why would Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam not exert effort during these last ten days, when they have been specified for the Night of Qadr. Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said,
Seek Laylat-ul-Qadr during the last ten days of Ramadān. (At-Tirmidhī)
The Virtues of Laylat-ul-Qadr
Laylat-ul-Qadr is a night full of blessings and goodness. ‘Ibādah carried out on Laylat-ul-Qadr is better than ‘ibadah carried out continuously for a thousand months (83 years and four months). Allāh ta‘ālā says:
Verily! We revealed it (the Qur’ān) during the Night of Qadr (from Al-Lawh Al-Mahfūz to the first heaven). Do you know what is the Night of Qadr? The Night of Qadr is much better than a thousand months. The angels and the Rūh (Sayyidunā Jibra’īl ‘alayhis salām) descend in it by the Command of their Rabb with every decision. It (this night) is full of peace. And (all of this) remains (from sunset) until the break of dawn. (97:1-5)
Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said:
During the Night of Qadr, Jibra’īl ‘alayhis salām descends with a group of angels and they make du‘ā of mercy for every servant who stands or sits remembering Allāh ta‘ālā (engaged in worship). (Al-Bayhaqī)
Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam also said:
Whoever stands in worship during the Night of Qadr with Īmān and hope of reward, all his previous sins will be forgiven. (Al-Bukhārī)
If we understood the virtues and the blessings of this great night, we too would exert great effort towards acquiring these blessings just as our pious predecessors did. It is reported regarding Qatādah rahimahullāh that he would complete the entire Qur’ān every three nights during the first twenty days of Ramadān and every night during the last ten days. In order to become deserving of the virtues of Laylat-ul-Qadr, one must exert every effort and do everything he can. One easy way of becoming deserving of the blessings of the Night of Qadr is to observe the i‘tikāf of the last ten days of Ramadān. Sayyidunā Abu Sa‘īd Al-Khudrī radhiyallāhu ‘anhu narrates that Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said,
Verily, in search of Laylat-ul-Qadr I performed i‘tikāf of the first ten days and then extended it to the next ten days for the same purpose; then I was told that this night is in the last ten days; so those who are performing i‘tikāf with me should perform the i‘tikāf of the last ten days. (Al-Bukhārī, Muslim)
The Importance and Virtue of I‘tikāf
We learn from the Sīrah of our beloved Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam that the i‘tikāf of the last ten days of Ramadān was a practice that he sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam would not miss. Sayyidah ‘Ā’ishah radhiyallāhu ‘anhā said that Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam would observe i‘tikāf in the last ten days of Ramadān until he passed away. (Al-Bukhārī, Muslim)
Sayyidunā Anas radhiyallāhu ‘anhu said that Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam observed i‘tikāf during the last ten days of Ramadān. One year he could not observe the i‘tikāf, so the following year he observed i‘tikāf for twenty days. (At-Tirmidhī)
Mentioning the virtues of i‘tikāf, Sayyidunā Ibn ‘Abbās radhiyallāhu ‘anhu says that Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said,
He (the one observing i‘tikāf) refrains from sins (as he confines himself to the boundary of the masjid) and is rewarded for all good deeds (that he cannot do due to being in i‘tikāf e.g. visiting the sick or participating in janāzah salāh) like that person who carries out good deeds. (Ibn Mājah)
The one performing i‘tikāf, through the blessing of staying within the confines of the masjid, is able to refrain from sins which he may have committed outside of the masjid. Along with this, he is able to engage in so many worships e.g. salāh, dhikr, tilāwat, du‘ā. Moreover, every moment of his is a means of reward as i‘tikāf in itself is also a worship; hence the one performing i‘tikāf gains the reward of i‘tikāf even whilst eating and sleeping.
I‘tikāf: A Fortune
The one observing i‘tikāf is extremely fortunate for he disassociates himself from everything and throws himself into the Court of His Lord and Creator. He remembers Him, praises Him, glorifies Him and sincerely seeks His Forgiveness; he cries over his past mistakes and beseeches His Creator for His Mercy and seeks nothing but His Pleasure. His days and nights are spent only in this pursuit. The author of Marāqī-Al-Falāh states that if i‘tikāf is observed with sincerity, then it is amongst the most virtuous deeds.
Our Task in Hand
So if one is able to perform i‘tikāf during the last ten days, he should most definitely do so. The ladies should also perform i‘tikāf at home. If one is not able to perform i‘tikāf for all of the last ten days, he should perform i‘tikāf for however many days he is able to. And if one is so busy that he cannot spend even one day in i‘tikāf then the least he should do is value each and every moment of the last ten days, especially the nights. He should refrain from every minor and major disobedience to Allāh ta‘ālā carry out actions which please Him to acquire Divine Pleasure.
May Allāh ta‘ālā grant us the tawfīq to value the remaining days of Ramadān, especially the last ten days. May He bless us with the virtue of Laylat-ul-Qadr. May He accept those who have intended to carry out the Sunnah i‘tikāf and may Allāh ta‘ālā make this Ramadān a turning point in our lives and enable us to live a life of obedience until we depart from this world. Āmīn.
The heart ❤️ of Islam, the resting place of al-Habeeb (SAW),
This is Madinah, whisper softly.
Clouds ☁️ of mercy envelope you in the day, the black starry ⭐️ sky wraps you at night,
Here rests the Lantern of Guidance who spread his white shimmering light,
This is Madinah, whisper softly.
The Sultan of Madinah, the Prince of Arabia, the Jewel of Islam, Imam of the Prophets, Leader of Mankind,
You fulfilled the Amanah, you passed on the message (of Islam), only those rejected who were blind,
This is Madinah, whisper softly.
Light upon light, mercy upon mercy, bounty upon bounty, blessings upon blessings, grace upon grace,
Ya RasoolAllah! Remove the veils and grant us sight of your glorious face.
This is Madinah, whisper softly.
You are a bandage for the wounded,
Your generosity leaves us dumbfounded,
You are the ointment for the sick,
You united your companions, like a building brick by brick,
This is Madinah whisper softly.
AbuBakr RA, Umar RA, Uthman RA, Ali RA,
They were those who after you guided rightly,
All your companions shone like stars ✨ bright,
Through your teachings, they attained great heights.
You called us “your brothers”, but from the right path we have strayed,
O Muhammad! (SAW) forgive us for the brotherhood we have betrayed,
We are indebted to you, not an ounce we have repaid,
Our deeds are shown to you full of sins and vice, mistakes have been made,
We seek your pardon from this day forward we will make up for the deeds that have been delayed,
Reignite your love, quench our thirsty souls, before our Iman fades.
I sit here under the green dome pondering for a while,
How wonderful was your smile,
How beautiful it would be to see you in Salah lead,
Recite the Quran eloquently and read,
To watch your companions weeping and taking heed,
It was here Islam was planted and you sowed the seed.
Oh! How I wish I was a pigeon flying over your dome just to be blessed with your company,
Rather, I deserve to be just a wing or a feather.
Perhaps I could have been a tree to give you shade when you rested,
Nay! A branch or leaf ? would have sufficed.
Let the soil of Madinah be the Surma for my eyes,
These eyes have no purpose if for you they don’t cry.
I have an earnest request to be close to you, to be your beloved friend,
Let the last chapter of my life finish and end,
In this holy city let me spend,
My final breath, my last moments, from here let my soul ascend.
Let my soul be taken in this sanctified place,
Grant me in al-Baqi a shroud and space.
So I may attain his Shafa’ah,
The day I need it most on Qiyamah.
(Final plea) O Allah! If you have to take me to account on Qiyamah,
Please do it away from the gaze of Mustafa SAW.
It was narrated that Anas bin Malik (Allah be pleased with him) said:
“The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: ‘None of you truly believes until I am more beloved to him than his child, his father and all the people.'” (Ibn Majah)
Today in Ottoman history marks the 94th anniversary of an event so momentous that we are still feeling the aftershocks of it today: the abolishment of the Office of the Caliph. It marked a turning point in history. To fully appreciate the significance of this anniversary, we must take ourselves back to Istanbul. The year is 1924, sometime after midnight. A single light, coming from the library is on, in the Dolmabahçe palace. There, an old man sits quietly and reads the Qurʾan, pondering over the state of his Ummah (i.e. the Muslim nation). His name is Abdülmecid II and he is the 101st Caliph of Islam. Two years prior, his cousin Sultan Mehmed VI Vahdeddin had been exiled to Italy (where he later starved to death) and the Ottoman Sultanate had been abolished by the Grand National Assembly. The end of the Ottoman Empire had finally come to an end, however, the Office of the Caliph was not so easily dismantled, due to fears of a massive backlash that would ensue.
A campaign of violence and intimidation began to ensure that all those who supported the Caliph were removed. Then, on the night of March 3rd, the final move was made. A young army messenger opened the door to the library of the Dolmabahçe palace. The hunched over Caliph continued to read from the Qurʾan. The messenger was initially taken aback by the sight, but he forced himself and read out the proclamation from the Grand National Assembly. The Caliph refused to leave Istanbul, but his staff were worried that they would all be killed by the army that had now surrounded the palace and had him and his family, including women and children at gunpoint. After weighing the few options he had, he reluctantly packed some of his clothes and went into exile. Before morning prayer, the Caliph was taken to the main train station at gunpoint where he and his family were put on the Orient Express bound for Switzerland.
An envelope containing £2,000 was given to the man who left behind entire palaces full of diamonds, emeralds and gold. The station master quickly took the Caliph and his family into his small house adjoining the train station to shelter them from the cold on the platform while they awaited the train to start on its journey. As they drank tea, the Caliph thanked him for his hospitality. The station master, a Jewish man, began to cry. “How can you thank me?” he asked especially knowing that it was the Caliphs/Sultans of Islam who had preserved the life and dignity of the Jewish people whenever they were persecuted elsewhere in the world (e.g. Spain). Instead, he thanked the Caliph for the honour of being able to serve him even if for the briefest moment. In the morning, citizens awoke to the news that they had scarcely believed would ever happen – the Caliphate had been abolished. There were isolated riots and uprisings in various regions, but the army quickly put them down. The last Caliph spent his days walking along the promenade in Paris, France. There, he lived a humble life until he died in 1944 during the Nazi occupation of France.
As no Caliph had ever been buried in non-Muslim lands, Abdülmecid II’s body was eventually transported to, and buried in Jannat Al-Baqi cemetery in Madinah, Arabia. The major political and spiritual office of Caliph had also been buried with him as well, an office which, to this day, remains to be filled, leaving a lasting impact on present-day Muslim lands and the Middle East, and fracturing the unity and peace that Muslims once possessed in their neighbourhoods.
Pictured: The last Caliph of Islam, Abdulmecid Efendi II, just before the last Jum’uah of the Caliphate.
Take me back to the old Paths, when Mums were at home. Dads were at work. Brothers went into the army. And sisters got married BEFORE having children!
Crime did not pay; Hard work did; And people knew the difference.
Mums could cook; Dads would work; Children would behave…Husbands were loving; Wives were supportive; and children were polite.
Women wore the dresses; and Men wore the trousers. Women looked like ladies; Men looked like gentlemen; and children looked decent.
People loved the truth, and hated a lie; They came to masjids to get IN, Not to get OUT!
Sermons sounded helpful;
Rejoicing sounded normal; and crying sounded sincere. Cursing was wicked; Drinking was evil; and divorce was unthinkable.
We read the Quran in public; prayed in school;
And reminded fellow Muslims the words of the Quran: to be called a Muslim was worth living for; to be called a kafir was a shame!
Sex was a personal word. homosexuality was an unheard word, and abortion was an illegal word.
Preachers preached because they read, understood, digested and acted on their words:
Leaders gave instructions with the fear of Allah, followers followed the rules and regulations of the community, sinners sought forgiveness from their Lord.
Being an imam meant you told people the word of Allah, being a Muslim meant you would live for the hereafter and not the dunya.
Laws were based on how Quran spelt it, homes read the Quran and Hadith; and masjids taught the Quran and the ways of the Prophet AS.
Shaykhs were more interested in new cpnverts than in new clothes and new cars. Children were more interested in learning their religion:
Give me that old time religion! This is good enough for me! I still like the “Old Path.”
MAY ALLAH MAKE YOU FROM THE PEOPLE HE LOVES AND GUIDE US TO THE RIGHT PATH.
“I am not perfect. Let’s both assume that the other is doing the best she can.”
Weddings are usually such happy occasions, full of love and hope for the future of the bride and groom. As wonderful as it can be, it can also mean mother-in-law problems. Something happens the moment a bride says, “I accept him.” Not only does she get a husband, but in most cases, a mother-in-law as well.
But far too many women describe this relationship as fragile, tense, and even competitive.
It’s no secret that in-laws are the subject of many marital arguments. The rivalry between wives and their mothers-in-law is a major source of tension in many marriages. You may find it interesting that many new brides get along very well with their husband’s parents at first; it isn’t until later—sometimes years later—that friction develops.
Time-after-time, daughters-in-law say things like, “My husband’s parents welcomed me into their family immediately and treated me as their own daughter.” Likewise, “My own in-laws showered me with gifts and included me in everything”. It’s not uncommon for young women to be very fond of their husband’s family, and vice versa… in the beginning.
Later on down the marriage, dealing with in-laws can be an overwhelming challenge—whether you are dealing with an overbearing mother-in-law who believes her opinions are superior to yours—or someone who tries to make you feel guilty whenever your needs conflict with hers. It may be tempting to gossip, hold silent grudges, or cut off all communication with troublesome in-laws – but that often just adds to the problem.
Mother-in-law problems can be one of the biggest issues in an engaged or married couple’s life. In some cases, they’re really more like out-laws. Some mother-in-laws have a way of letting everyone know their displeasure with the new family member over issues big and small – and yet seem to forget their own son or daughter can think or speak for themselves, and in most cases, should.
Why is it that the mother-in-law relationship can be so difficult? When you think about it, it really shouldn’t be. You have so many meaningful things in common: love for the same person, wanting what’s best for that person, and for them to be happy. For some though, it’s these same things that make for fast adversaries.
Some mother-in-law problems arise out of a competition for the attention of the adult child. Because they are now spending all of their time with their new spouse, there may not seem to be room enough for mum, which can be seen as not loving them as much anymore. When they visit mum, of course your spouse is going to take you with them – you’re now a package deal. Mother-in-law’s can be very resentful of having to share time and space with someone else.
Who would know what’s best for their kids better than a mother? As adults, however, we know what’s best for ourselves, not our mum. Some mothers, however, feel that they should reign supreme over our lives – even when we’re 45-years-old. It can be a hard habit for parents to break and some never feel compelled to stop parenting, even adult children. What makes that more difficult is that some of us don’t know how to let our mothers know that we are now adults who think for ourselves.
No one wants or needs their mother-in-law (or future one) telling them what’s best for their partner or worse, guilt-tripping them because of some imaginary slight or that they don’t measure up to her expectations. Big or small, whatever the issue may be, if she can’t refrain from commenting or speaking out inappropriately, it’s up to our spouse to talk to her. This can be difficult for our partners since for some it can seem unthinkable to speak out “against” their mother and be independent.
Advice for mother-in-laws:
Pray for your daughter in law, rather than prey on her. Hope and pray that the marriage of your son will be successful. Don’t sit in the background and hope for your daughter-in-law to fail. Ask Allah to show you how to love your daughter-in-law as your own daughter.
Try to be understanding more than criticising. Ask questions to understand. Don’t tell your daughter-in-law how things should be. Don’t expect your son to do what you want him to do anymore. Expect and encourage him to consult with his wife. Rather than question or criticize your daughter-in-law, speak to her and reason with her.
Compliment your daughter-in-law; never complain about her. Honour your daughter-in-law in the presence of your son. Compliment your daughter-in-law; never complain. Make an effort to applaud, praise, and thank your daughter-in-law. Tell her how much you appreciate her positive influence on your son and why you think she’s a good mother. Your daughter-in-law may be different from you. Accept her for who she is. Realise that your daughter-in-law wasn’t raised the same way you raised your son and maybe doesn’t have the same standards you have. Perhaps she is from a different family or caste or race…Try to understand her mind set and the way her family operated. Do not try to change her into who you would like her to be.
Act like a family, fight like a family, not an enemy. Encourage your son to build, develop, and define his marriage role. Don’t fight for position by grasping and grabbing for your son’s time and emotions. Good mums want their kids to have good marriages. If you are a family, act like one. Families fight, they discuss their issues and that’s how they get resolved. This can be done lovingly and constructively, not destructively! It doesn’t have to be a he said/she said/you said situation. Tiptoeing around the problems and acting like they don’t exist doesn’t help anyone, it only hurts everyone in the long run. Ask your daughter-in-law to let you know if/when you offend her. Remember that Shaytan wants to destroy your relationship.
Your son isn’t perfect, not before marriage and certainly not after. Remember that your son has always had faults. Your child was not perfect before she married him. You love your son, so does your daughter-in-law. Every change that you see in your son is not her doing. Every change that you see in your son is not her doing.
A good mother-in-law doesn’t make the wife feel like she doesn’t measure up, or give the impression that she wishes her son would have made a ‘better’ choice. A good mother-in-law encourages, accepts, and loves unconditionally. Allow your daughter-in-law to disagree and know that it isn’t something personal. Don’t be offended if a daughter-in-law does not share your tastes, dreams, and values. Tell her about decisions you faced as a mother of infants, toddlers, teenagers, young adults, etc. Talk about more than superficial things. Get to know her for the person Allah created her to be. Then, come alongside her to mentor, encourage, and build a relationship so that if/when you need to give loving input or direction, it is not taken as meddling. Express your gratitude towards her: “You truly are the wind beneath my son’s sails and I really appreciate and love you. You understand my son far better than I do, and I thank Allah for you.” “I’ve got the best daughter-in-law God could give. I am so blessed.” Finally, offer to take care of the grandkids so your daughter-in-law can have a day to herself.
Okay, mothers-in-law, there’s the list. What are we going to do about it?
The second year of my son’s marriage, he and his wife had Thanksgiving with us. My daughter-in-law made a delicious sweet potato casserole. My mother and I complemented her on it and asked for the recipe. “It’s a family recipe,” my daughter-in-law said. “So I don’t give it out.” —Anonymous mother-in-law
Whoa! I had thought that daughters-in-law were the ones with the in-law stories. Well, apparently mothers-in-law have their share of stories, too.
One mother-in-law wrote something that brought back memories. “That little boy that brought me dandelions and messy hugs,” she said, “is now a grown man with a family of his own. I need to fully release him so he is allowed to change and adapt to his wife and adult life. I don’t want to be a parent who says or does things that grate in the mind of my daughter-in-law. She is the one who knows my son best now.”
Yes, a mom relinquishes her title of “first lady” in her son’s life on his wedding day. Perhaps that’s why some have described the relationship between a mother- and daughter-in-law as fragile or tense. Allah certainly didn’t intend it to be that way.
Advice for daughter-in-laws:
She is still his mother, she gave birth to him. Even though you are the woman in her son’s life now, be considerate of the fact that she used to be the woman in his life. The most important thing that you can do for your mother-in-law is to love her son unconditionally…You’ve now taken the spot as her son’s biggest
Respect her for who she is, think of her as your own mother. Don’t try to change your mother -in-law. Accept her eccentricities. Realise that she may do things differently in her home, try to understand her ways. Especially, if you live with them. Bear in mind her age, think of your elderly parents.
Do not assume things, rather ask and clarify. If I have offended you, I may not know this. You have the freedom to say to me, nicely, ‘Remember when you said ______. Did you mean _____?’ I am not perfect. Let’s both assume that the other is doing the best she can. Don’t judge, there are two sides to any story.
Remember, you are family and not foes! Ring your mother-in-law off your phone not your son’s phone. Take her out, just the two of you. Go shopping! Discover what you have in common. Keep your in-laws informed of their grandchildren, don’t deprive them.
Express gratitude, not a bad attitude! Post on your Facebook page: ‘I am thankful for my mother-in-law! I am so grateful for our great relationship. It is so important! And ever since I got married our relationship has become so natural and I love spending time with her!’ Please take time to express your appreciation for a gift by writing a note or calling just to say, ‘Thanks!’ If she or any of your in-laws visit you welcome them in with a smile, prepare something special for them. Show your happiness, don’t block yourself from them.
Some mothers- and daughters-in-law form close friendships very quickly. For others, this may take years. But most mothers- and daughters-in-law do want to connect with each other. They want to find common ground. They want to know each other as individual women with feelings, beliefs, and ideas. Do not fight your mother-in-law over your husband and same to the mother-in-law over your son. If the daughter-in-law cooks something or buys something for her husband, please do not compete with her for praises.
Why we read Qur’an in Arabic even we don’t understand it.
This is a beautiful story!
An old American Muslim lived on a farm in the mountains of eastern Kentucky with his young grandson. Each morning Grandpa was up early sitting at the kitchen table reading his Qur’an. His grandson wanted to be just like him and tried to imitate him in every way he could. One day the grandson asked, “Grandpa! I try to read the Qur’an just like you but I don’t understand it, and what I do understand I forget as soon as I close the book. What good does reading the Qur’an do?”
The Grandfather quietly turned from putting coal in the stove and replied, “Take this coal basket down to the river and bring me back a basket of water..”
The boy did as he was told, but all the water leaked out before he got back to the house. The grandfather laughed and said, “You’ll have to move a little faster next time,” and sent him back to the river with the basket to try again. This time the boy ran faster, but again the basket was empty before he returned home. Out of breath, he told his grandfather that it was impossible to carry water in a basket, and he went to get a bucket instead. The old man said, “I don’t want a bucket of water; I want a basket of water. You’re just not trying hard enough,” and he went out the door to watch the boy try again.
At this point, the boy knew it was impossible, but he wanted to show his grandfather that even if he ran as fast as he could, the water would Leak out before he got back to the house. The boy again dipped the basket into river and ran hard, but when he reached his grandfather the basket was again empty. Out of breath, he said, “See Grandpa, it’s useless!” “So you think it is useless?” The old man said, “Look at the basket.”
The boy looked at the basket and for the first time realized that the basket was different. It had been transformed from a dirty old coal basket and was now clean, inside and out.
“Son, that’s what happens when you read the Qur’an. You might not understand or remember everything, but when you read it, you will be Changed, inside and out. That is the work of Allah in our lives.”
If you feel this is worth reading, please forward to your contacts/friends. Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) says: “The one who guides to good will be rewarded equally”.
“Verily, we revealed the reminder (Qur’an) and we are its guardian.” (15:9)
Narrated ‘Ali bin Abi Talib (Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Whoever recites the Qur’an and memorises it, making lawful what it makes lawful, and unlawful what it makes unlawful, Allah will admit him to Paradise due to it, and grant him intercession for ten of his family members who were to be consigned to the Fire” (Tirmidhi as weak).
Alhumdu Lillah, it is through the sheer grace and mercy of Allah, al-Kareem, we find so many people memorising the Holy Qur’an in the UK. In a small country like England, there must be thousands of Huffadh, Ma Sha Allah – Tabarak Allah – Fa Lillahil Hamd. Where I live, in Blackburn, there must be approximately 1,000+ Huffadh (male and female) in the whole town – Alhumdu Lillah. We should not take this lightly, rather, we must thank Allah profusely; firstly, for the blessing of the Holy Qur’an and secondly the blessing of memorising/hifdh. There are countries in the world that don’t have a hundred Huffadh in the whole country, let alone a thousand in a town. Most of these efforts have been in the last quarter of a century. If we rewind back twenty-five years ago, there were very few places that offered Hifdh classes and those that did, the class sizes were very small (less than a dozen boys). Back in the 70s and 80s, places like Bradford and Dewsbury only had one Hifdh class in the whole town, and there was a handful in Lancashire, as well as one in Bolton.
This is all down to the miraculous nature of the Holy Qur’an. One may question, how?
If we were to give these boys and girls who are memorising the Holy Qur’an a book in English, any book of any genre and they were told to memorise it, would they be able to? Surely they should be able to learn a page each day from the book, just like they learn a page a day from the Holy Qur’an. And this should be easier, as it is in their language but, we seldom find such children. This in itself is an indication that memorising the Holy Quran is not based entirely on the child’s memory but it is upon the merit of the Holy Qur’an being a miraculous book. This is a special favour bestowed upon this Ummah, as previous nations were not able to memorise their holy scriptures en masse, thus we will not find a person who has memorised the Bible in its entirety, nor the Torah. ‘And We have indeed made the Qur’ân easy to understand and remember’ (54:17).
So, whoever strives to memorise it and recite it regularly, it will be made easy for him, and whoever turns away from it, will lose it. ‘According to reports from the Banu Israil themselves, the ruler of Rome, Anitos Apifonis got every single copy of the Tawrah and burnt it until not a single copy was left. The same happened to the Bible so the original transcriptions became extinct as a result of the attacks of Titus of Rome…’ (An Approach to the Qur’anic Sciences).
Nowadays, we have a wholesale of Huffadh and a greater bulk on the production line wanting to become a Hafidh. This all seems good and well on the surface but, we must remember a Hafidh is a soul chosen by Allah SWT to protect His book, like the verse mentions, ‘Verily, we revealed the reminder (Qur’an) and we are its guardian’ (15:9).
However, let us bear in mind, becoming a Hafidh is not Fardh Ayn (obligatory on everyone). The Sahabah (Allah be pleased with them) were not all Hafidh, some only knew a few verses or just a Surah. Great Imams like the Master of Hadith, Imam Bukhari (Allah have mercy upon him) was not a Hafidh, some of the greatest scholars in later times like the esteemed Allamah Anwar Shah Kashmiri (Allah have mercy upon him), the honourable Shaykhul Hadith Mawlana Yunus Saheb (Allah have mercy upon him) were not Hafidh of the Holy Qur’an. If these scholars who had photographic memory were not Hafidh, why do some parents force their children to memorise? Parents need to have a balance with their approach towards Hifdh, otherwise, this can have negative consequences later on in life. Becoming a Hafidh has great rewards, no doubt, but we also need to bear in mind if your child is not cut out for it, please do not force them and suffocate them. Consequently, such children may end up completing their Hifdh, but rarely keep up with their revision thereafter and this has severe punishments attached to it. Becoming a Hafidh is only part one, retaining your Hifdh is part two and this is the bigger commitment. Memorising and retention are both as important as each other. It is more virtuous that your child learns the last ten Surahs voluntarily and remembers them till death, rather than forcing him/her to memorise the full Holy Qur’an and he/she later forgets it. They will then be committing a major sin as the verse explains, ‘The one who turns away from my message, he shall have a straitened life, and We shall raise him blind on the Day of Judgement’ (Surah Tahaa).
My purpose is not to be negative and discourage parents from Hifdh; it is merely an eye-opener and a gentle reminder of the realities. We frequently hear the virtues of a Hafidh, but seldom hear the other side which are the warnings of forgetting the Holy Qur’an. For now, let us ponder upon the following:
Not every child HAS to become a Hafidh.
The virtues of a Hafidh are great, but the warnings for those who forget the Holy Qur’an are just as great.
Becoming a Hafidh does not guarantee you Jannah, you must act upon the Holy Qur’an and carry out other obligations such as salah, fasting, keeping a beard, good etiquette and so forth.
Memorising the Holy Qur’an is not a medal to be worn around the neck once completed. It has implications and we must repeat and revise it until our death along with leading Taraweeh salah.
A Hafidh is not like someone who has obtained a degree or achieved a certificate and has no further obligations. The Hafidh has a duty thereafter to i) behave like a Hafidh according to the Sunnah ii) to understand the Holy Qur’an, especially what is halal and haram.
Narrated by Samurah bin Jundab (Allah be pleased with him), the Prophet (ﷺ) said in his narration of a dream that he saw, ‘He whose head was being crushed with a stone was one who learnt the Qur’an but never acted on it, and slept ignoring the compulsory prayers’ (Bukhari).
My aim is to create a balance – alongside all the virtues of Hifdh, there are also the punishments for forgetting the Holy Qur’an. This does not necessarily mean forgetting the whole Qur’an, it can be a Surah or even just a verse. Many people learn Surah Yaseen or parts of the Amma para (30th) in childhood, then later in life tend to forget it – the same punishment applies there too.
From Anas bin Malik (Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: ‘The rewards for my Ummah were displayed before me, even (the reward for) the dust that a man comes out of the Masjid with. The sins of my Ummah were displayed before me, and I have not seen a sin worse than that of a Surah or an Ayah of the Qur’an which a man learned and then forgot’ (Tirmidhi).
‘And We have indeed made the Qur’ân easy to understand and remember’ (54:17).
So, whoever strives to memorise it and recite it regularly, it will be made easy for him. And whoever turns away from it, will lose it. Imam Ibn ul-Munadi (Allah have mercy on him) said in Mutashabih al-Qur’an (p. 52), ‘The Salaf were always afraid of forgetting Qur’an after they had memorised it because this was classed as a shortcoming.’ Imam Suyooti (Allah have mercy on him) said in al-Itqaan (1/106), ‘Forgetting it is a major sin.’ As was stated by Imam Nawawi (Allah have mercy on him) in al-Rawdah and others, because of the Hadith “I was shown the sins of my Ummah…”
For a Hifdh family (who have a child/ren memorising Qur’an), they need to prioritise. They need to realise that memorising the Qur’an isn’t an honour bestowed on just anyone. Yes, you are the type of parents, if the Oxford Dictionary had a definition for you, it would read thus,
Hifdh parent
/hɪfdh parent/
noun. “a mum or dad whose social, emotional, physical and psychological decisions are governed by what para their children are memorising”
When one commits to this, they need to put their heart and soul and mind into it, and everything else is secondary.
Every Muslim parent wants their child to be successful in both worlds and to keep them focused on the straight path. One of the surest ways to raise one’s child firmly on the Deen is to create a connection with the Holy Qur’an which has been explicitly sent down as a guidance for mankind. For this connection to take place, one needs to create an affinity for this book to inspire feelings of attachment. Understanding the Holy Qur’an and exploring its depth can all be developed later in life, but as long as parents are able to create an association between the child and the Holy Qur’an, the most important job of all is done.
Tips for parents, In Sha Allah
Your intention should be correct for making your child a Hafidh – to please Allah SWT and to inculcate love for the Holy Qur’an in your child. We often hear parents talking about ‘free tickets to Jannah because my child is a Hafidh.’ It’s like the poor child is carrying the sins of the whole family and if he does not complete Hifdh then the family are doomed for Hell. La Hawla Wa Laa Quwwata Illa Billah.
First and foremost, observe your child’s memory skills and conclude if your child has the ability to memorise the Holy Qur’an by testing his current Surahs and Duas. As your child becomes better at reciting the Quran, inspire him to memorise portions of the Quran such as the short Surahs, and some important, daily ones like Surah Yaseen and Surah Al-Mulk. Explain to them the importance of these various Surahs as well to create an understanding and an extra bond with the Quran.
Instil the love of the Holy Qur’an into your children by buying them an audio Qur’an. Play short Surahs whilst in the car or even on YouTube at home as they are easier to memorise – do this daily, in the morning or at night.
Start early –“learning when young is like engraving on stone.” From birth (or even in the womb), recite the Holy Qur’an to them in a beautiful voice. Let the sound of your Qira’ah evoke love and an attachment to the Quran for them. What would be better is to recite the Quran after Fajr, so that when your child opens his/her eyes in the morning, the very first sound he/she hears are the Words of Allah.
Set goals and rewards. Treat your child with positive reinforcements like their favourite chocolate or extra playtime when they complete a Surah/Para as this will motivate and encourage them further. Constantly remind them of the reward and that their efforts are not being wasted.
Set a timetable at home that works simultaneously and effectively with school time and school work. Arrange two short learning sessions rather than one long one – from personal experience, after Fajr and after school is effective. Most, if not all, experienced teachers advise the best time to memorise to be after Fajr. Memorisation during the daytime has also proven to be effective as long as the child is stress-free and is not heavily distracted with mind-numbing game consoles and other technology.
If you like, you can create a healthy competition between your children, however, DO NOT compare your children, because every child is unique. Set different goals for each depending on their capabilities and see who reaches their goal first.
Model what you want your children to emulate – children learn most from their parents’ actions rather than their commands. Engage yourself with the Holy Qur’an, try to memorise parts of it yourself and you will notice that your children will take more interest in picking up the Holy Quran themselves. Actions speak louder than words.
Provide the right environment with the right ambience – the child’s surroundings are equally as important as the actual memorisation itself. A serene and quiet environment can reduce time spent on memorising a page by almost 10-15% as well as making it easier to retain, as the mind does not have to process and turn-off distractions. Try selecting a place with greenery as plants tend to emit a positive energy. The inner spiritual surroundings of the heart and soul are even more important. It is hard for the Holy Qur’an to exist in a heart that is occupied with music, television, cartoons and games. It is the job of the parent to create an environment conducive to learning the Qur’an by keeping their children away from negative influences, and providing them with the opportunity to go regularly to the Masjid, meeting good Muslims, pious people and attending gatherings where they can learn about the Deen. A hifdh family is different from a normal family.
To pace is better than to race. Some children can learn three pages every day, others struggle with three lines. Every child is different so pace your child according to his level. Do not put a timeline on when the hifdh needs to be finished as this can make the child panic, lose confidence when deadlines are not met and are put under unnecessary pressure. Many parents demand and force (even sub-consciously) their child to finish their hifdh ‘before their GCSE exams’ or ‘before starting college’ so that ‘it’s out of the way’. Although this seems practical, it can sometimes have an adverse effect with the child wanting to quit due to feeling unable to finish ‘on time’. Even if it is a lifelong task, remember ‘quality is better than quantity’. Quran is easy to memorise and remember – consistency and patience is the key. Let your children learn with love in their hearts, rather than force and stress.
Last but not least, be patient and do not get angry when your child makes mistakes. Every child is different, and you must not create despondency in them by becoming exasperated. Try and sit with them to help them learn, encourage and give a mother and father’s support. Make dua to Allah SWT to help your child and to keep them on the path of learning throughout their lives. Pray Tahajjud and give Sadaqah on behalf of them. The Prophet (ﷺ) said: “Three supplications are answered, there being no doubt about them; that of a father (for his children), that of a traveller and that of one who has been wronged” (Abu Dawud).
In your sajdah, when it rains, when you’re fasting, when you’re walking or driving or about to sleep—every moment—make Duʿâ for Allah to open the Holy Qur’an for your child, to make it easy for them to memorise, to make them successful in their memorisation and for them to love, live and teach the Holy Qur’an through all of their intentions and actions.
Memorising the Holy Qur’an may seem like an insurmountable mountain in the beginning but with every step you take up that mountain, the body will get stronger, In Sha Allah, and with time, consistency, determination and perseverance, it will get easier, they’ll get faster and eventually they will make it to the very top of that mountain!
NB: One addition, particularly for mothers, is to feed your child some memory boosting foods, such as raw honey, Zamzam water, olive oil, dates and almonds. Please avoid unhealthy and takeaway food or anything that has a lack of vitamins and minerals, contains high cholesterol, white sugar, carbonated beverages, processed carbohydrates and overeating in general. Children should get sufficient sleep and a good amount of exercise. Exercise causes more oxygen to transfer to your brain and a lack of exercise leads to laziness, weight gain, and internal health issues, and will consequently affect memorisation and other mental faculties.
The second issue is that of a teacher, i.e. finding a good teacher. The Holy Qur’an cannot be learnt without a teacher. Even the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) learnt from angel Jibreel (Alayhis Salam). Similarly, Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) taught the Holy Qur’an and listened to it from his Companions (Allah be pleased with them). A good teacher will not only correct one’s recitation but also teach the correct Tajweed and pronunciation. From my own experiences of teaching children who have left other Madrasahs or classes that run from home, there seems to be a lot of emphasis on sabaq i.e. the new lesson. Little or no emphasis is being put on their revision i.e. dawr. Alongside this issue is of some classes being full to the brim. I strongly believe that having 15-20 students in a Hifdh class is far too much, especially when the allocated time is typically two to two and a half hours per day. Having this high number of children in one class, in that amount of time, is extremely unfair on them as they do not receive the full desired and needed attention. This then leads me on to the extortionate fees at such places. So, we have this short amount of time for the high number of children receiving minimum attention, at £10 – £15 per week. Anyone can do the maths and see that some Madrasahs, unfortunately, are turning into a business. Unfortunately, some teachers are too focused on ‘quantity’, rather than ‘quality’ and there is ample proof of this. I am no saint nor a great scholar but if you are teaching the Holy Qur’an solely to make money or business, your teaching will be bereft of any sort of barakah and noor.
“The best among you (Muslims) are those who learn the Qur’an and teach it” (Sahih Bukhari)
Tips for teachers In Sha Allah:
Having a pure intention: Whether it is memorising the Qur’an or doing anything else for the sake of Allah SWT, the single most important thing needed for the success of that goal is to have the right intention. One must secure one’s intention purely for the sake of Allah SWT, for even if the person does not achieve success in this world, his success is guaranteed in the hereafter. Do not make your Madrasah/Class a money making business. Also, remind your students to have a firm intention for Allah SWT.
“And recite the Qur’an (aloud) in a slow, (pleasant tone and) style”(73:4). Ali (Allah be pleased with him) commented on this verse saying, “Tarteel is Tajweed of the letters and recognising the places of Waqf (stopping). Before teaching the children Hifdh, please ensure their Tajweed is rectified and their pronunciation is correct as incorrect pronunciation can change the meaning.
Don’t have an age limit for your class, as there is no real age when to start Hifdh and it is never too late – In Sha Allah. Some teachers do recommend age seven, others recommend eleven. My personal opinion is that some children are seen to mature before others so can start earlier. Sometimes children of the same age are worlds apart in their understanding and receptiveness. Sometimes a child who is brilliant in school might have a harder time with the Holy Qur’an. Judge your student for who he is before embarking him on the journey to learn the Qur’an.
Ensure your students have one specific copy of the Holy Qur’an from which he/she reads all the time. A visual image of the page leaves an imprint in the mind making it easier to recall later.
Encourage students to read melodiously and beautify their recitation as much as they can. It is pleasing to one’s ears and provides an incentive to continue with the memorisation. It helps to make one’s memorisation firm and strong because any mistake will instantly feel and sound incorrect as it will distort the harmony of the rhythm one is used to. A Miswak is instrumental in this, it cleans the teeth but also clears the throat. Ali (Allah be pleased with him) said: “Verily, your mouths are the pathways of the Qur’an, therefore cleanse your mouth with the Miswak thoroughly” (Ibn Majah).
Keep rewards charts/stickers for the children; praise them regularly for their good efforts and gently correct them when they falter. Avoid negativity, never use a loud voice, harsh words or insulting remarks when it comes to instructing or motivating your students.
“And if an evil suggestion comes to you from Satan, then seek refuge in Allah. Indeed, He is Hearing and Knowing” [7: 200]. Shaytan will always try and stop this meritorious deed. Remind your students of the virtues of the Qur’an and becoming a Hafidh of the Qur’an. Consistency is key and there are no holidays or weekends when you are memorising Quran. Students should be trained (as well as parents) to understand that any time off will most certainly have repercussions on their learning. Also, try not to give too many holidays in summer and in Ramadhan too as this can be disastrous in Hifdh class.
The Ustadh should always remain in a state of Wudhu, reminding the children to keep their Wudhu for as long as possible. “Truly, Allah loves those who turn unto Him in repentance and loves those who purify themselves (by taking a bath and cleaning and washing thoroughly their private parts, bodies, for their prayers, etc” [2: 222]. The Prophet (ﷺ) used to remain in a state of cleanliness and Wudhu. This is one of the best ways to keep Shaytan from influencing us and whispering evil thoughts. Allah SWT loves those who keep themselves clean and it is only His love and protection that can help us defeat our greatest enemy.
I was reading online about a particular Ustadh in another country whose Hifdh class students were known to be the best in the town. Why? Every month he would gather the students one evening and make them lead in Tahajjud, they would read their Qur’an that they had memorised that month. This might be hard, but not impossible! If not for Tahajjud, maybe one weekend in the daytime make them lead in Nafl Salah. This will boost their confidence and also train them for Taraweeh, which is the litmus test for every Hafidh.
And finally, the last point but probably the most important – there is absolutely no excuse or justification for physical beating or abuse when it comes to teaching. This was never seen in the life of the Prophet (ﷺ) nor the illustrious companions (Allah be pleased with them). I know of many adults who have either left Islam or abandoned the Holy Qur’an at an older age because of the harshness that was associated with it at a younger age, due to culture and not religion. I always say, “give them sweets and avoid the beats.”
NB: Teach the students Adab/etiquettes – how to hold the Holy Qur’an with respect, not to make drawings in their holy Qur’an and always carry the Holy Qur’an in their right hand. It is very sad to see, more often than not, children walking home with their holy Qur’ans in their left hands, which is such a basic etiquette generally forgotten by Ustadhs.
Exclusive advice from Umm Muhammad (a hafidhah class teacher)
I felt girls are usually left out when it comes to Hifdh, even though this is changing now. Alhumdu Lillah, in Blackburn we have half a dozen Hafidhah classes. So I asked one of the local teachers to write a few paragraphs, as advice for girls.
My personal experience is girls have a better attention span when it comes to learning and focusing. However, they are fragile by nature (especially when they are younger).
It is more beneficial for girls to start at a young age (before puberty) as it gives them a head start and they will not be disturbed by their menstrual cycle. However, Hifdh can be started at any age, as stated previously in the book.
Once girls start their menstrual cycle it becomes a little harder due to the number of days they are taking off from learning and revising each month. The impact of this is it is harder for them to get back into a routine and they can struggle with sabaq para and dawr (revision) as a result.
Repetition: Begin with one verse or a group of verses and repeat it/them until you’ve committed them to memory.
Writing – Go over the verse with your finger over and over. For visual and kinesthetic learners, the process of moving one’s hand to dictate the verses, combined with the visual focus of spelling every word correctly, helps commit the verses to the brain’s long-term memory.
For kinesthetic learners, movement is key to learning. Directing the verses means acting out key elements in verses with hand or head movements. So, for example, if the verse is discussing rain, one can use one’s fingers to make the movements of rain coming down from the sky. If the verse mentions an elephant, one can use one’s arms to make the trunk of an elephant. This would only be applicable for those who know the Arabic translation of the Qur’an.
In comparison to boys there is less emphasis and encouragement on girls to do Hifdh, as there is fear that due to their menstrual cycle and childbearing, females can forget or have less time to revise. Whilst this may be true, a person who has memorised and has revised well in their student years will not find it too difficult to maintain, In Sha Allah. I completed my Hifdh after marriage, Alhumdu Lillah!
Memorising the holy Qur’an is like working out with weights. At first, when you begin lifting weights, you lift a certain amount that you can handle and heavier weights may seem impossible. You may look at others who lift weights and stare in awe as they lift so much more than you feel you could ever do. But if you lift those same weights every day or every other day for a year, they become too light for you! You add more weights as your body strengthens and eventually even those are too light. So you continue to add as your body becomes stronger, faster, and all of what you previously used to lift no longer proves challenging.
It’s the same way with the Holy Qur’an. It takes practise. Commitment. Time. Focus. Energy. And if you aren’t doing it every single day and working with a teacher on a daily basis, it’s going to take even longer. That’s okay. It is not a race. You do not need to finish your entire memorisation in a year or two or even three or four if you have all these other life responsibilities going on. Enjoy the journey of memorisation. When you’re frustrated, take a short break to rejuvenate and regroup, and then begin again.
Always remember, a female doing Hifdh is full of blessings – for herself and her family/children. Finally, only women have this blessing of conceiving and if a woman recites Qur’an regularly during her pregnancy, surely the barakah will be seen on the newborn child. If a non-Hafidha can also recite Holy Qur’an, surely it is much easier for a Hafidhah to recite off by heart whilst carrying out her daily chores.
I hope to see more girls becoming Hafidhah and learning the meaning of the Qur’an, along with teaching Tafsir and Tajweed, In Sha Allah. The importance of learning is just as much in women as it is in men. My advice to the Ummah at large is to show respect to such girls, just like we respect the males as well.
I will conclude with some advice for those who are either fully Hafidh or have memorised a portion of the Qur’an but are struggling to revise and refresh it. It was narrated that ‘Abdullah (Allah be pleased with him) said the Prophet (ﷺ) said: “It is not right for any one of you to say, ‘I have forgotten such and such.’ On the contrary, he has been made to forget. Try to review the Qur’an, for it is more likely to escape from men’s hearts than camels (let loose)” (Bukhari, 5032).
I read these lines of poetry written by Imam Shafi’ee (Allah be pleased with him) when he complained to his teacher about a weak memory and they have stayed with me since:
I complained to Wakee‘ RH about my poor memory:
Give up your sins, was his advice to me;
For knowledge is a light from divinity,
And the Light of God is veiled by iniquity.
If one strives hard to review the Qur’an regularly, there will be no sin on him even if he does forget some of it, for Allah sees the effort. The blame is on those who neglect the Qur’an and fail to review it and read it regularly. Let’s put it this way: the blessings of memorising the words of Allah and the barakah it brings to the life of a Muslim cannot be beaten! My advice would be to memorise as much as you can even if it is an Ayah and review it every day, for the Qur’an will be a great companion to have in the grave and on the Day of Judgement. Additionally, for Madrasah teachers who aren’t necessarily Hifdh teachers, let them be aware of implementing the memorisation of certain virtuous Surahs such as Surah Waqiah, Surah Mulk, Surah Kahf. The student may memorise them at the moment but later forget or keep up with its revision as to them this is not necessary because they are not a Hafidh/Hafidhah and also, the whole system of retention is not embedded in them like it is for an actual Hafidh/Hafidhah.
We, the Huffadh need to contemplate once or twice a week about how much Allah Ta’ala has been kind to us that He has made us from the elite of this Ummah. Are we living up to this title? With what perspective do the people look at us? Do they respect us because of who we are or because of our being from those who uphold the Qur’an? These are just some questions we need to ask ourselves and ponder over – Hadhrat Mawlana Muhammad Saleem Saheb Dhorat (hafidhahullah).
Since there is no book except the Book of Allah that is free from deficiencies or errors, we always welcome and encourage any advice, comments, criticism and corrections so long as they are scholastic and evidence-based.
Allah grants this book His approval.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bC9CykWg-uM
Ismail ibn Nazir Satia (One who is in dire need of Allah’s forgiveness, mercy and pleasure).
These are notes from the above course delivered in Manchester, 2nd April 2017. As they are notes please excuse the lack of references and brevity. Any corrections, please feel free to comment below. JazakAllah Khayran.
Intro – Brother Jalal ibn Sa’eed (London)
“Do not put your sin above Allah.” Sometimes we sin and think our sin is unforgivable. Ask Allah for forgiveness and Allah will forgive you.
Allah tests us in different ways, the greater the trial the greater the reward.
It was narrated from Mus’ab bin Sa’d RA that his father, Sa’d bin Abu Waqqas RA, said:
“I said: ‘O Messenger of Allah ﷺ, which people are most severely tested?’ He said: ‘The Prophets ﷺ, then the next best and the next best. A person is tested according to his religious commitment. If he is steadfast in his religious commitment, he will be tested more severely, and if he is frail in his religious commitment, his test will be according to his commitment. Trials will continue to afflict a person until they leave him walking on the earth with no sin on him.’” (Ibn Majah)
“Sihr” comes from the root word “Suhoor”, which mean darkness. The whole aspect of magic it’s just a jinn, to scare you and make you think they can do something supernatural. The truth is, nothing is supernatural – only Allah is supernatural ‘La Hawla Wa La Quwwata Illa Billah’ (There is no power or might except with Allah).
Even the Prophet ﷺ had Sihr (black magic). His enemies got the most powerful sorcerer. The effect of it was He kept thinking he needed to do ghusl. It was done by a Jewish man Labeed ibn A’sam, who took hair from the comb of the Prophet ﷺ and date skin from a tree. Eventually, they found the well which had date-palms like the devil’s horns. (I have found the full hadith below)
Narrated Aishah RA: Magic was worked on Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) so that he used to think that he had sexual relations with his wives while he actually had not (Sufyan said: That is the hardest kind of magic as it has such an effect). Then one day he said, “O `Aishah do you know that Allah has instructed me concerning the matter I asked Him about? Two men came to me and one of them sat near my head and the other sat near my feet. The one near my head asked the other. What is wrong with this man?’ The latter replied he is under the effect of magic The first one asked, Who has worked magic on him?’ The other replied Labid bin Al-A’sam, a man from Bani Zuraiq who was an ally of the Jews and was a hypocrite.’ The first one asked, what material did he use)?’ The other replied, ‘A comb and the hair stuck to it.’ The first one asked, ‘Where (is that)?’ The other replied. ‘In a skin of pollen of a male date palm tree kept under a stone in the well of Dharwan’ ” So the Prophet (ﷺ) went to that well and took out those things and said “That was the well which was shown to me (in a dream) Its water looked like the infusion of Henna leaves and its date-palm trees looked like the heads of devils.” The Prophet (ﷺ) added, “Then that thing was taken out’ I said (to the Prophet (ﷺ) ) “Why do you not treat yourself with Nashra?” He said, “Allah has cured me; I dislike to let evil spread among my people.” (Bukhari)
Please remember, whomsoever Allah loves the most, He SWT will test him.
It was narrated from Anas bin Malik RA that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said:
“The greatest reward comes with the greatest trial. When Allah loves a people He tests them. Whoever accepts that wins His pleasure but whoever is discontent with that earns His wrath.” (Ibn Majah)
Shaykh Khalid Hibshi (Kingdom of Saudi Arabia)
The first thing we must understand is Tawheed, the Oneness of Allah SWT. Allah controls everything and is the Master of everything. Nothing can happen without His approval and nothing is out of His control.
We wish we could live in ease, in comfort. There would be no jealousy, no hatred, no enmity. But the truth is besides that. Iblis has promised to destroy us.
When we were born, Shaytan poked us until we cried. Hadith says, “There is no baby except that the Shaytan pokes it when it is born, so it screams from the Shaytan’s poke, except for Ibn Maryam and his mother.” (Bukhari)
The Prophet ﷺ taught us how to protect ourselves at certain times; whilst eating;
The phrase that is prescribed for mentioning Allah when eating is to say “Bismillah” (In the name of Allah), because of the report narrated by ‘A’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her), that the Prophet ﷺ said: “When one of you eats some food, let him say Bismillah, and if he forgets to do so at the beginning, let him say Bismillah fi awwalihi wa aakhirihi (In the name of Allah at the beginning and end).Narrated by at-Tirmidhi, 1781.
whilst drinking;
Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah RA reports that Rasulullah ﷺ would drink in three breaths. When he would lift the cup to his mouth, he would say ‘Bismillah’ and when completed [the sip], he would say ‘Alhamdulillah’. Nabi (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa Sallam) would do this thrice. (Al Mu’jamul Awsat of Imam Tabarani, Hadith: 844. Declared sound Hasan by Hafiz Ibn Hajar, Fathul Bari, under Hadith: 5631. Also see Majma’uz Zawaid, vol. 5 pg, 81 and Al Futuhatur Rabbaniyyah, vol. 5 pg. 240/241)
whilst going to the toilet:
Narrated Anas RA: Whenever the Prophet (ﷺ) went to answer the call of nature, he used to say, “Allah-umma inni a`udhu bika minal Khubuthi wal Khaba’ith” i.e. O Allah, I seek Refuge with You from all offensive and wicked things (evil deeds and evil spirits). (Bukhari)
and when going to sleep, as well as during intercourse;
“Recite بِسْمِ اللَّهِ Bismillah (In the name of Allah) before closing the doors of the house, before covering utensils with food in them, switch off or turn off fires, light etc.” [Bukhari] “If one cannot find anything with which to cover the utensil then one should place a stick across the top of the utensil.” [Muslim]
“Before climbing into bed, dust the bed thrice with the corner of your clothes.”[Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawood, Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah]
“To make Miswak before retiring to bed even if one has already made it for Isha prayer.” [Kitabut Tahaarah and Sunnats]
“To sleep in a state of Wudhu.” [Tabarani, Hakim, Abu Dawood]
“To sleep on the Right, facing the Qibla with the right hand underneath the head like a pillow and with the knees slightly bent.” [Bukhari]
It was narrated from Aa’ishah RA that when the Prophet (ﷺ) went to bed every night, he would hold his hands together and blow into them, and recite into them Qul Huwa Allaahu Ahad, Qul a’oodhu bi rabb il-falaq and Qul a’oodhu bi rabb il-naas. Then he would wipe them over whatever he could of his body, starting with his head and face and the front of his body, and he would do that three times. [Bukhari]
If afraid to go to sleep or feeling lonely or depressed then recite: أَعُوذُ بِكَلِمَاتِ اللهِ التَّامَّاتِ مِنْ غَضَبِهِ وَعِقَابِهِ، وَشَرِّ عِبَادِهِ، وَمِنْ هَمَزَاتِ الشَّيَاطِينِ وَأَنْ يَحْضُرُونِ
A’oothu bikalimaatil-laahit-taammaati min ghadhabihi wa ‘iqaabihi, wa sharri ‘ibaadihi, wa min hamazaatish-shayaateeni wa ‘an yahdhuroon.
I seek refuge in the Perfect Words of Allah from His anger and His punishment, from the evil of His slaves and from the taunts of devils and from their presence. [Abu Dawud and Tirmidhi]
Narrated Ibn `Abbas RA:The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “If anyone of you, when having sexual intercourse with his wife, says: Bismillah, Allahumma jannibni-Sh-Shaitan wa jannib-ish-Shaitan ma razaqtana, and if it is destined that they should have a child, then Satan will never be able to harm him.”[NB: Please recite before removing clothes, as we shouldn’t take the name of Allah unclothed].
Even when we are praying Salah Shaytan whispers. One of the Sahabah RA complained to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ about waswaas (satanic whispers) during prayer, and he ﷺ said: “The Shaytan comes between me and my prayers and my recitation, confusing me therein.” The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “That is a devil called Khanzab. If he affects you seek refuge in Allah from him and spit drily to your left three times.” He [the Sahabi] said, I did that and Allah took him away from me. (Narrated by Muslim, 2203)
He makes us think we have broken our Wudhu when we haven’t. Repeating Wudu again and again due to doubts is the result of falling into satanic whispers. It is action driven by a negative thought. Wudhu does not break on mere doubts and this rule is very clear from the Ahadith of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم: Abu Hurairah رضى الله عنه narrated that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said, “If one of you finds a disturbance in his abdomen and is not certain if he has released any gas or not, he should not leave the mosque unless he hears its sound or smells its scent.” (Sahih Muslim)
Ibn al-Mubarak RH, “If one is uncertain about his condition of purity, he does not need to perform a new ablution.”
(Shaykh Khalid said)… If I were to ask you, put your hands up if Shaytan walked into this room, you would get scared? Many of us would. Whereas we should only fear Allah SWT. Some of us fear the creation so much if a mouse came we would run for miles.
Have we forgotten, Iblis and his army stood shoulder to shoulder on the Day of Badr. Whilst the Muslims stood with the angels, so Iblis got scared.
And [remember] when Satan made their deeds pleasing to them and said, “No one can overcome you today from among the people, and indeed, I am your protector.” But when the two armies sighted each other, he turned on his heels and said, “Indeed, I am disassociated from you. Indeed, I see what you do not see; indeed I fear Allah. And Allah is severe in penalty.” (8:48)
Once the Prophet ﷺ started praying Salah, he stepped forward and backwards. Again, forward and backwards, then he ﷺ took his blessed hand out. After Salah, he ﷺ asked Sahabah RA, “Did you see me move forward and backwards?” They replied, “Yes!” It was Shaytan and he had a fire with which he tried to harm me, so I strangled him.
“The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Last night a big demon (afreet) from the Jinns came to me and wanted to interrupt my prayers (or said something similar) but Allah enabled me to overpower him. I wanted to fasten him to one of the pillars of the mosque so that all of you could see him in the morning but I remembered the statement of my brother Solomon (as stated in Quran): My Lord! Forgive me and bestow on me a kingdom such as shall not belong to anybody after me (38.35).” The sub-narrator Rauh said, “He (the demon) was dismissed humiliated.”
Many of the Salaf had Sihr upon them.
Abu Sulaiman Darami RH says, “I would stand at night in prayer. Shaytan would come in the form of a snake. Sometimes he would come up my Thawb (garment).”
The teacher of Imam Bukhari RH, Yahya ibn Ma’een RH would recite Ayatul Kursiyy 5 times when he entered his house. Even though there is no Hadith to endorse this, but he would pray it every time he entered his house. Until he would hear a voice say, “That’s enough!” (One narration says 50 times).
Imam Malik RH related to me from Safiyy RA, the mawla of Ibn Aflah RA that Abu’s-Saib, the mawla of Hisham ibn Zuhra RA said, “I went to Abu Saeed al-Khudri RA and found him praying. I sat to wait for him until he finished the prayer. I heard a movement under a bed in his room, and it was a snake. I stood up to kill it, and Abu Saeed gestured to me to sit. When he was finished he pointed to a room in the house and said, ‘Do you see this room?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘There was a young boy in it who had just got married. He went out with the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, to al-Khandaq, (the ditch which the Muslims dug in the 5th year of the Hijra to defend Madina against the Quraysh and their allies).
When he was there, the youth came and asked his permission, saying, “Messenger of Allah. Give me permission to return to my family.” The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, gave him permission and said, “Take your weapons with you, for I fear the Banu Quraydha tribe. They may harm you.” The youth went to his family and found his wife standing between the two doors. He lifted his spear to stab her as jealousy had been aroused in him. She said, “Don’t be hasty until you go in and see what is in your house.” He entered and found a snake coiled up on his bed. He transfixed it with his spear and then went out with it and pitched it into the house. The snake stirred on the end of the spear and the youth fell dead. No one knew which of them died first, the snake or the youth. That was mentioned to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and he said,“There are Jinn in Madinah who have become Muslim. When you see one of them, call out to it for three days. If it appears after that, then kill it, for it is a Shaytan.” “‘
This is the reason the Prophet ﷺ forbade us from urinating in holes. As Jinn/snakes can reside there. If you harm them, they may take revenge. Narrated Abdullah ibn Sarjis RA:
“The Prophet (ﷺ) prohibited to urinate in a hole.” (Abu Dawud)
Qatadah RH (a narrator) was asked about the reason for the disapproval of urinating in a hole. He replied: It is said that these (holes) are the habitats of the jinn.
These events are present in today’s day and age. One of the greatest things the Shaykh has seen was: A person had a car accident, he was taken to the hospital immediately. Whilst in hospital, the Jinn spoke from inside him, “He has harmed me! He ran me over in his car! So I took revenge!”
It is very important to read morning and evening Duas.
Read Bismillah before we do anything, the Hadith says:
Abu Hurayrah RA: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:“Every important word or matter that does not being with the remembrance of Allah is maimed.” Imam Ahmad in al-Musnad (14/329)
Imam Ahmad also recorded in his Musnad, that a person who was riding behind the Prophet ﷺ said, “The Prophet’s ﷺ animal tripped, so I said, `Cursed Shaytan.’ The Prophet said, “Do not say, ‘Cursed Shaytan,’ for if you say these words, Satan becomes arrogant and says, ‘With my strength I made him fall.’ When you say, ‘Bismillah,’ Satan will become as small as a fly.”
Also, the Bismillah is recommended before eating, for Muslim recorded in his Sahih that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said to `Umar bin Abi Salamah while he was a child under his care,
“Say Bismillah, eat with your right hand and eat from whatever is next to you.”
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: If one says when eating, Bismillah ir-Rahmaan ir-Raheem, that is good and more perfect. End quote from al-Fataawa al-Kubra, 5/480
Imam Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) said: It is more important to note the phrase to be used when mentioning the name of Allah. … The best is to say Bismillah ir-Rahmaan ir-Raheem, but if one says Bismillah, that is sufficient and fulfils the Sunnah. End quote from al-Adhkaar, 1/231
Ali bin Abi Talib RA narrated that: the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “The screen between the eyes of the jinns and nakedness of the children of Adam when one of you enters the area of relieving oneself is saying: ‘Bismillah.'” (Tirmidhi)
I would like to add another Sunnah, it was narrated from Jabir ibn ‘Abdullah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:“When the wings of the night spread – or when evening comes – keep your children in, for the devils come out at that time. Then when part of the night has passed, let them go. And close the doors and mention the name of Allah, for the Shaytan does not open a closed door. And tie up your waterskins and mention the name of Allah, and cover your vessels and mention the name of Allah, even if you only put something over them, and extinguish your lamps.” Narrated by Bukhari (3280) and Muslim (2012). A version narrated by Muslim says: “Cover vessels, tie up waterskins, close doors and extinguish lamps, for the Shaytan does not undo waterskins or open doors or uncover vessels.”
“And from the evil of the envier when he envies.” [113:5]
We need to avoid evil eye and evil glances. Nowadays, the mobile phone can take you to those places. Even if you don’t go yourself. You can easily be affected by evil eye, it will get into your body But hard to get out. Remember, the Prophet ﷺ told the best of people, ‘Sawwam and Qawwam and Akmalun naas imaana’ [Regular fasting, frequent in Tahajjud, best of people in Iman], the Sahabah RA – still they were told to protect themselves from evil eye:
It was narrated from ‘Aishah RA that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Seek refuge with Allah, for the evil eye is real.”
It was narrated from ‘Aishah RA that the Prophet (ﷺ) commanded her to recite Ruqyah to treat the evil eye.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “The evil eye is real and if anything were to overtake the divine decree, it would be the evil eye. When you are asked to take a bath (to provide a cure) from the influence of the evil eye, you should take a bath.” (Muslim).
What are we doing to protect ourselves?
What is worse, evil eye or cancer?
What is worse, evil eye or swine flu?
What is worse, evil eye a deadly disease?
Evil eye can be there from a young age till old age.
Light travels 186,282 miles per second (299,792 kilometres per second), evil eye travels faster than this.
There are many types of evil eye, astonishing eye – when you see something amazing on your husband/wife. You can even afflict yourself, just like this the Jinn can affect you with evil eye. Brothers and sisters, learn to say “MA SHA ALLAH!” “BARAK ALLAH!”
Cure: Not just evil eye, anything that befalls us is due to sins. We need to avoid sins completely, major and minor. Then Fardh Salah, Sunan (plural of Sunnah), offer them in a way that pleases Allah. The Prophet SAW said,”People in Salah, some only get half the reward, some a quarter, some one tenth and some the full reward.” Because of the lack of concentration, where is our concentration in Salah?
Look at our Salah, we are all aware of our own Salah. Whereas the Munafiq (hypocrites) prayed five times a day WITH JAMA’AH. But despite this Allah says, “Verily the Hypocrites will be in the lowest part of Hell.” (Surah Nisaa)
Only the known Munafiq would delay his Salah after Fajr. Most of us only pray Jumu’ah. We don’t ever offer any nafl or tahajjud, but our lives are full of sin.
E.g. each one of us has a computer or laptop, we use anti-virus to protect it from viruses. In the same way we need to protect our bodies and our Iman!
The Prophet ﷺ forbade us from many clothes which draw attraction. We all use social media, we put up our best pictures, best food and family’s pictures. To cause evil eye you don’t need to be in front of someone. A digital image is enough. Social media is a big cause of the evil eye.
Even by smelling can cause evil eye. You make biryani, someone smells it and says “What wonderful biryani.!” Also, by hearing, someone came first in his exams and shouted his results. A jealous person states, “How’s it possible?” The evil eye is passed on. By tasting, you made a cake and someone bit it and said, “Such a sweet cake!”
Brothers, remain humble at all times and do not display the blessings of Allah SWT.
Ibn ‘Abbas RA reported Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) as saying: “The influence of an evil eye is a fact; if anything would precede the destiny it would be the influence of an evil eye, and when you are asked to take bath (as a cure) from the influence of an evil eye, you should take bath.” (Muslim)
It was narrated from Abu Hurairah RA that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “The evil eye is real.”(Ibn Majah)
NB: One must seek advice from someone qualified for a cure, but here are a few tips to help you In Sha Allah, Shaykh mentioned the following things help to cure black magic/evil eye:
Quran recitation – “And We send down of the Quran that which is a healing and a mercy to those who believe.” (Surah Al-Israa, 17:82)
Ruqya – Narrated `Aisha RA:“The Prophet (ﷺ) ordered me or somebody else to do Ruqya (if there was danger) from an evil eye.” (Bukhari)
Sidr leaves – Al-Hafiz Ibn Hajar Al-‘Asqalani RH said in Al-Fath that “Ibn Abtal stated in the books of Wahab bin Menabah to take seven leaves of a green Sidr, grind them with two rocks, add water to it, read the verse of Al Kursi (2:255) and Al-Qawakil (the Surah’s which start with “Qul”), take three sips, then wash up with the rest. This will remove all of his afflictions, and is a cure for men who have sexual disorders.” (Fath Al-Bari -10/233)
Hijamah (cupping) – Narrated Abu Hurayrah RA: The Prophet (ﷺ) said:“If anyone has himself cupped on the 17th, 19th and 21st it will be a remedy for every disease.”(Abu Dawud)
Ajwah dates – Narrated Sa`d RA: I heard Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) saying, “Whoever takes seven ‘Ajwa dates in the morning will not be affected by magic or poison on that day.”(Bukhari)
Zam Zam water – Ibn al-Mubarak RH entered Zamzam and said, “O Allah, Ibn al-Mu’ammal told me, from Abu’l-Zubayr from Jabir that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: ‘The water of Zamzam is for whatever purpose it is drunk for,’ so, O Allah, I am drinking it (to quench) my thirst on the Day of Resurrection.”
In addition to these, I would like to add a few more:
Black seed oil – Narrated Khalid bin Sa`d RA:“We went out and Ghalib bin Abjar was accompanying us. He fell ill on the way and when we arrived at Medina he was still sick. Ibn Abi ‘Atiq came to visit him and said to us, “Treat him with black cumin. Take five or seven seeds and crush them (mix the powder with oil) and drop the resulting mixture into both nostrils, for `Aisha has narrated to me that she heard the Prophet (ﷺ) saying, ‘This black cumin is healing for all diseases except As-Sam.’ Aisha said, ‘What is As-Sam?’ He said, ‘Death.” (Bukhari)
Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Treat your sick ones with charity.” (Saheeh al Jami) Giving Sadaqah also helps, little or large in sha Allah.
Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah’s Messenger (peace be upon him) said, “When the Adhan has been pronounced Satan takes to his heels and passes wind with noise during his flight in order not to hear the Adhan. When the Adhan is completed he comes back and again takes to his heels when the Iqamah is pronounced and after its completion he returns again till he whispers into the heart of the person (to divert his attention from his prayer) and makes him remember things which he does not recall to his mind before the prayer and that causes him to forget how much he has prayed.”
(Sahih al-Bukhari, Vol. 1, Book 10, Hadith 6)
Finally, from my own experience going for Hajj/Umrah benefits greatly. Makkah Sharif and Madinah sharif are such blessed places, just visiting them can cure a person. Remember, they are surrounded by angels and the rahmah of Allah is constantly descending in plenty-fold. Also, giving Sadaqah/charity is powerful. It breaks the backbone of Shaytan.
Notetaker – Ismail ibn Nazir (One who is in dire need of Allah’s forgiveness, mercy and pleasure)
Zainab bint Younus, Canada
My advice first and foremost is to select your companions carefully and wisely. He/she should be smart, decisive and sharp. The journey is a blessed one but not an easy one, I like to give a true picture and not make it sound like a walk in the park. At times you have to make difficult decisions on the spot, a good companion will help at such times. People reading this blog will be from different spheres of life, some may never have travelled abroad before. Or they have travelled, but not to Haramayn Shareefayn. It is not like a visit to the local mosque, where you have 200-300 people praying. Brace yourself! You can get pushed in Salah, and knocked about in Tawaf, it can be extremely hot, things go missing and your possessions can get stolen, which I will elaborate on later. Going to such a beautiful and holy place with the wrong companions can sometimes make the whole journey a tedious and terrible one. This is why I have inserted the quote of Umar (Allah be pleased with him) above. Even if they are family members or relatives or old friends, travelling brings out a lot of “true” qualities in a person, Hajj and Umrah expose people to another level, be warned!
Preparations
Etiquette of the Masjid/Haram
Many women like to pray Salah next to men or directly behind them:
The city of Hijrah, a city once called Yathrib,
Weddings are usually such happy occasions, full of love and hope for the future of the bride and groom. As wonderful as it can be, it can also mean mother-in-law problems. Something happens the moment a bride says, “I accept him.” Not only does she get a husband, but in most cases, a mother-in-law as well.
