Tag: muhammad SAW
10 Ways to be the Ideal Muslim Husband
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Zainab bint Younus, Canada
MARITAL ADVICE LISTS are common to find in Muslim literature and lectures, yet the information is almost always targeted towards women. However, we all know that it takes two to tango – and so here is a list aimed at Muslim husbands in the hopes that they, too, will benefit and be able to improve their relationships.
1. Have taqwa and iḥsân
Know that you are responsible for your end of the marriage, regardless of how the other party treats you. Fulfill your wife’s rights without demanding yours first, and know that you seek Allah’s Pleasure over anyone else’s. Do your job with excellence, and don’t make it conditional. Iḥsân is not merely to worship in the ritual sense, but to conduct oneself in general with an awareness that Allah is Al-Raqîb (the Ever-Watchful), and to fulfill one’s duties in the best of manners.
Then he (Jibrîl) said, “Inform me about iḥsân.” He (the Messenger of Allah) answered, “It is that you should serve Allah as though you could see Him, for though you cannot see Him yet (know that) He sees you.” (Muslim)
2. Respect her
Remember that Allah describes marriage as a bond of love and mercy – love ebbs and flows, but mercy and respect must always be there, even – especially – in times of conflict. Unfortunately, we tend to present respect as a quality that men need (“men need respect, women need affection”). The truth is, however, that one can love someone without respecting them… and this is very, very dangerous. To have mercy and respect one’s wife is to never assume that she exists merely as an extension of you or to serve your needs. To respect her is to honor her, to defend her from harm and others’ accusations, and to have husn al-ẓann of her.
In cases of disagreement, this respect translates as not forcing your own opinion upon her when there is Islamically acceptable room for differences of opinion.
It should go without saying, but unfortunately it bears repeating nonetheless – respecting your wife means never, ever, abusing her, physically or otherwise.
“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.” [Sûrat Al-Rûm, 30:21]
Even in times of conflict, Allah tells us to behave in the most respectful and gracious of manners:
And do not forget graciousness between you. [Sûrat Al-Baqarah, 2:237]
Abû Mûsa Al-Ashʿari (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:
I asked the Messenger of Allah: “Who is the most excellent among the Muslims?” He said, “One from whose tongue and hands the other Muslims are secure.” [1]
3. Be emotionally intelligent
Empathy, being attuned to the other person’s preferences, learning to understand their personality and responding appropriately without expecting to change them into something they’re not… supporting and respecting each other as both individuals and as a team. The Prophet ﷺ was an emotionally intelligent husband, who knew the differences in his wives’ personalities and interacted with them in a manner best suited to each woman. He comforted Ṣufiyyah when she wept; he had spirited discussions with ʿÂishah (May Allah be pleased with her) and he encouraged Ḥafṣah’s (May Allah be pleased with her) for knowledge.
In a famous narration known as the Hadith of Abu Zarʿ(May Allah be pleased with him) [2] ʿAishah told the Prophet ﷺ the story of eleven women who sat together and described their husbands’ qualities and behaviours. The eleventh woman, Umm Zarʿ, described Abû Zarʿas a man who was extremely generous to his wife, showering her with gifts; who went out of his way to please her; who never rebuked her or verbally abused her; who made sure that she was comfortable and satisfied. To Umm Zarʿ, there was no greater husband than Abû Zarʿ- and the Prophet ﷺ himself told ʿÂishah, I am to you as Abû Zarʿwas to Umm Zarʿ, except that I will never divorce you.
4. Be a True Qawwâm
Know that being a qawwâm is a matter of being a good leader – not authoritarian or a dictator, but someone who inspires love and respect, who treats others with dignity and respect… The popular book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is a great resource for understanding what good leadership is. There are several excellent Islamic resources discussing leadership lessons from the life of the Prophet ﷺ. [3] [4] Strive to embody the Sunnah in your character, not just in how many rakʿahs a day you pray.
ʿÂishah RA described the Prophet thus: “His character was the Quran.” [5] Be the type of husband that a wife describes in such a manner.
Remember that as a qawwâm, you are responsible and accountable for the well-being of your household and those under your care.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The amîr (ruler) who is over the people is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock; a man is a shepherd in charge of the inhabitants of his household and he is responsible for his flock…” [6]
5. Be friends before you become spouses
That might sound odd (or not) – but we often put so much pressure on ourselves to fulfill a role (husband/wife), that we forget to get to know each other as friends first. Every marriage will go through ups and downs, intimately and otherwise… and you’ll be surprised to realize how much having a solid, sincere friendship can pull you through the hard times.
One example of RasûlAllah’s “friendship” with his wives is his relationship with Sawdah bint Zamʿah RA. She was the first woman whom he married after the death of Khadijah, and although she was considered to be elderly and not as beautiful as the other women whom he would later marry, their relationship was one of camaraderie, confidence, and laughter. [7]
6. Don’t be embarrassed or ignorant of female biology
Learn about it – from menstruation to female sexuality to pregnancy and everything else. You need to know this stuff – it will impact your life significantly, intimately and otherwise. Don’t laugh it off or act as though it’s not worth your time and attention. Women’s health is sorely misunderstood, and having a disinterested (or worse, disgusted) husband can make things even more difficult for women.
The Prophet ﷺ did not shy away from these matters, either as a husband or as a Messenger of Allah. Instead, he constantly enjoined men to be aware of and sensitive to their wives’ needs – just as he was with his wives.
Narrated Umm Salamah RA:
While I was laying with the Prophet ﷺ under a single woolen sheet, I got the menses. I slipped away and put on the clothes for menses. He said, “Have you got “nifâs” (menses)?” I replied, “Yes.” He then called me and made me lie with him under the same sheet. [8]
7. Be responsible
Being “a good Muslim husband” doesn’t just mean fulfilling the basic rights as a husband and leaving it at that. Being a good Muslim husband means that you are on the ball as a responsible adult – whether it’s paying the bills, taking out the trash, cleaning a mess in the house, or being an engaged father (not ‘babysitting’). Doing these things is not a “kindness to the wife,” or “helping out at home.” It’s not “extra credit” and deserving of lavish praise. It is part and parcel of being a grown man responsible for his surroundings, his family, and himself. Do these things out of mindfulness that Allah will never waste your efforts for His Sake.
Narrated Al-Aswad RA:
I asked ʿÂishah what did the Prophet use to do at home. She replied. “He used to keep himself busy serving his family and when it was time for the prayer, he would get up for prayer.” (Bukhâri)
ʿÂishah RA reported:
I was asked, “What did the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, do in his house?” I said, “The Prophet was a man among men. He would remove fleas from his clothes, milk his sheep, and serve himself.” (Musnad Ahmad 25662)
8. Don’t pursue your nawâfil at the expense of your wife’s farâ’iḍ
One issue that many men fall into is that in their zeal to engage more in ʿibâda, they end up burdening their wives even more – to the extent that she is barely able to pray her five ṣalawât with khushûʿ. Both spouses should encourage and facilitate opportunities for each other to strengthen as Muslims, but mothers of young children especially need their husbands to step up so that they can have the necessary time they need to reconnect with Allah and flourish spiritually. (And no, that doesn’t just mean five minutes here and there.)
Ramadan is a time when this becomes more obvious than ever – for example, many men will go to Ṣalat Al-Ṭarâwîḥ while leaving their wives to deal with the children, in addition to having cooked ifṭâr beforehand. On a daily basis, though, go out of your way to facilitate your wife’s ʿibâda and spiritual connection.
Narrated Abû Juḥaifah RA:
The Prophet ﷺ made a bond of brotherhood between Salmân Al-Fârisi RA and Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA. Salmân RA paid a visit to Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA and found Umm Al-Dardâ’ RA dressed in shabby clothes and asked her why she was in that state. She replied, “Your brother Abû Al-Dardâ’ R is not interested in (the luxuries of) this world.”
In the meantime Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA came and prepared a meal for Salmân RA. Salmân RA requested Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA to eat (with him), but Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA said, “I am fasting.” Salmân RA said, “I am not going to eat unless you eat.”
So, Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA ate (with Salmân). When it was night and (a part of the night had passed), Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA got up (to offer the night prayer), but Salmân RA told him to sleep and Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA slept.
After sometime Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA again got up but Salmân RA told him to sleep. When it was the last hours of the night, Salmân RA told him to get up then, and both of them offered the prayer.
Salmân RA told Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA, “Your Lord has a right on you, your soul has a right on you, and your family has a right on you; so you should give the rights of all those who has a right on you.”
Abû Al-Dardâ’ RA came to the Prophet ﷺ and narrated the whole story. The Prophet ﷺ said, “Salmân RA has spoken the truth.” [9]
9. Learn conflict resolution skills
One big reason that couples end up going to Shuyûkh for counseling is because they simply haven’t learned how to communicate and resolve conflicts in a healthy manner. It’s not even about one specific issue or another; it’s about learning how to deal with whatever issues arise, in the most respectful and appropriate manner possible. [10]
The Quran and Sunnah urge positive reconciliation between believers, and especially between husbands and wives.
“And live with them honourably. For if you dislike them – perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.” [Sûrat Al-Nisâ’, 4:19]
“And if a woman fears from her husband contempt or evasion, there is no sin upon them if they make terms of settlement between them – and settlement is best. And present in [human] souls is stinginess. But if you do good and fear Allah – then indeed Allah is ever with what you do, Acquainted.” [Sûrat Al-Nisâ’, 4:128]
10. Love your wife for who she is
Not because she’s the person who cooks for you or does your laundry. Not because she’s the mother of your child(ren). Not because you’ve settled into routine and you feel comfortable having her around and she knows how to work the coffee maker and where the family’s paperwork is filed. Love her for her. Her personality traits, her talents, her hobbies, the things about her that make her unique.
Notice them, appreciate them, compliment them. Let her know that you don’t just see her as wife or mother, but as an individual on her own. Know that long before she married you, indeed long before she was born to her own parents, she was created as a separate soul – a human being whose primary identity is as a slave of Allah.
And most importantly – let her know that you love her, with all the pride and openness that RasûlAllah ﷺ demonstrated when he was asked, “Who do you love most?” and he responded, simply and beautifully, “ʿÂishah.” [11]
There are of course numerous other pieces of advice that can be dispensed on the topic – everything from giving gifts to resolving in-law issues to arranging date-nights and so on. However, more important than specific behaviours are the principles behind them – and it these principles which have been highlighted.
In short, Muslim men should strive to match the standards set by RasûlAllah ﷺ when he said:
“The best of you are those who are the best to their wives, and I am the best of you to my wives.” [12]
————————–
[1] http://sunnah.com/riyadussaliheen/18/2
[2] http://sunnah.com/bukhari/67/123
[3] http://muslimmatters.org/2014/10/28/lessons-in-leadership-from-the-prophet-muhammad-saw/ and http://muslimmatters.org/2014/11/04/21-lessons-in-leadership-from-the-prophet-part-2/
[4] https://theislamicworkplace.com/2006/11/15/the-leadership-process-of-muhammad-s-from-hadith/
[5] http://sunnah.com/urn/2203080
[6] http://sunnah.com/abudawud/20/1
[7] http://thesalafifeminist.blogspot.ca/2014/08/his-laughter-her-love.html
[8] http://sunnah.com/bukhari/6/5
[9] http://sahaba.net/salman-farisi-rights/
[10] https://aljumuah.com/cooling-the-fires-of-marriage-part-1-an-approach-to-conflict-resolution/
[11] http://sunnah.com/bukhari/64/384
[12] Narrated by Al-Tirmidhi, 3895; Ibn Mâjah, 1977; classed as saḥîḥ by al-Albaani in Saḥîḥ al-Tirmidhi
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
Continued…
Hajj
For those going first time it is easy to get lost, there are a lot of hotels and sometimes they all look the same to you and you might be quite a distance from the Haram. For the first few days go with someone to the Haram, and remember the walk back and picture a big hotel or shop nearby, e.g my hotel is near Hilton or behind Movenpick. Keep the hotel card, especially if you have elderly parents with you.
Remember, those going for Hajj there will be approximately 3 million people in Hajj. Thinking of that should give you the ability to be more patient. Hajj is nothing but an expression of love. During the journey towards Allah, the haji bears all difficulties with great patience. Also, bear in mind there will be delays. If you arrive late at Arafat or Muzdalifah you will still be rewarded for your intention so do not fret or frown. Arafat day try and spend the most time in Dua from Dhuhr to Maghrib in a standing position (as long as possible). Arafat to Muzdalifah is usually a difficult one as most if not all of the people take the buses as it is dark after Maghrib. It is ideal to walk the rest of Hajj, saves you from the headache of buses. If your bus is late, spend the time in dhikr and Qur’an not talking or gossiping or on WhatsApp and social media. Don’t let Shaytan take advantage.
Allah SWT has made things easy for us now, personal hygiene is more important at times like this not just for you but to take other people into consideration too, the elderly the sick those who have terminal illnesses who will be around if you’re not washing to keep clean you will spread germs.
There are even some things that recite the talbīyah alongside a muḥrim when one recites it. “There is no Muslim who recites the talbīyah during the Ḥajj andʿUmrah but that everything which is to his right and left also recite it with him. Whether it is rocks, trees or even soil, to the farthest ends of the earth in each direction, from here and from there.” (Tirmidhī)
Miscellaneous
Daily Items to take to the Haram/Masjid: Drawstring bag for slippers, musalla, water bottle, Qur’an, dua books/tasbih, mobile phone and money.
Janazah Salah Sayyiduna Abu Hurayrah (radiyallahu ‘anhu) reports that Rasulullah ﷺ said: “Whoever attends the funeral procession and offers the Janazah Salah, will get a reward equal to one ‘qirat’, and whoever accompanies it till burial, will get a reward equal to two ‘qirats’. It was asked, “What are two qirats?” He answered, “Like two huge mountains.” (Sahih Bukhari, Hadith: 1325 and Sahih Muslim, Hadith: 945)
For those travelling for the first time, there will be Janazah Salah after every Fardh Salah almost. You will hear an announcement, “As-Salah ala Al-Amwaat” or “As-Salah ala Al-Atfaal” (Prayer for the deceased or prayer for children). We should seize the opportunity as it takes only a few minutes to pray. As a lot of people tend to forget the method and women may never have prayed Janazah Salah, the method is here:
Method of Janazah Salah:
The manner of performing Salatul Janazah is as follows:
The body of the deceased must be placed in front of the Imam who leads the Salah.
The Imam stands in line with the chest of the deceased.
Everyone in the congregation must have the intention of performing Salaah Al Janazah for the sake of Allah and in prayer for the deceased.
Make the intention of praying behind Imam.
One must then say Allahu Akbar while raising both hands as in Takbeer At Tahreema (the same manner in which one raises his hands to begin the daily Salah).
Then fold your hands as one does in his daily Salah.
At this time, one must recite the 1) Thana. The Thana is:-
“Subhanakallahumma wa bihamdika wa Tabarakasmuka wa Ta’aala Jadduka wa laa ilaha Ghairuka.”
2) After this, a person must say Allahu Akbar again, but must not raise his hands.
At this time, one will recite the Durood, (preferably the same as recited in the daily Salah).
3) Then say Allahu Akbar once again without raising your hands. After this takbeer, one will make the dua for the deceased.
Based on who the deceased is, one will recite the relevant dua. That is, there is a special dua for adults, one for a minor boy and another for a minor girl.
The dua for an adult is:
Allaahurnmaghfir li hayyinaa wa mayyitinaa wa shahidinaa wa gha-ibinaa wasaghirinaa wa kabirinaa wa dhakarinaa wa unthanaa,
Allaahumma man ahyaitahu minnaa fa’ahyihi ‘alal islam wa man tawaffaitahu minnaa fatawaffahu ‘alal imaan.
O Allah! Forgive those of us that are alive and those of us who are dead, those of us that are present, those of us who are absent, those of us that are young and those of us that are adults; our males and our females. O Allah! Whomsoever of us you keep alive let him live as a follower of Islam and whomsoever you cause to die, let him die as a believer.
The dua for a girl child is :
Allaahum maj ‘alhaa lanaa fa-ra—tanw waj ‘alhaa lana aj-ranw wa zukhranw waj ‘alhaa lana shaafi’atan wa mushaf-fa;ah
O Allah, make her our forerunner, a source of reward and treasure and make her plead for us and one whose plea has been accepted.
The dua for a boy child is:
Allaahum maj ‘alhu lnaa fa-ra—tanw waj ‘alhu lana aj-ranw wa zukhranw waj ‘alhu lana shaafi’an wa mushaf-fa’aa
O Allah, make him our forerunner, a source of reward and treasure and make him a pleader for us and one whose plea has been accepted.
NOTE: If you don’t know any of the above Duas then pray Rabbana Aatina Fid Dunya hasanah wa fil Aakhirati Hasanah wa qina azaaban naar.
When the Salatul Janazah is finished the body should be taken to the cemetery for burial.
And Allah knows best.
Women and Jamat
As most women don’t attend the Masjid for Salah in the UK, they may not know how to perform missed Rak’aat with the imam:
Witr in Ramadhan
Those who go for Umrah in Ramadhan, usually have a dilemma whether or not to pray Witr with the imam. As the imam will pray 2 rak’ah then 1 separate. It is allowed for Hanafis (people who follow Hanafi fiqh) to follow the imam in Witr. Please see fatwa below:
https://nawadir.org/2016/04/02/witr-salah-in-makkah-and-madinah/
The preferred view of Hadhrat Mufti Muhammad Taqi Uthmani Saheb (hafidhahullah) is pray 2 rak’ah nafl with the imam and then don’t pray the 1 rak’ah separate, just make dua in the qunoot/dua after rukoo.
Also, after Taraweeh Salah there is no announcement for Witr like the Masajid in England. So many people stand up for Witr thinking it is still Taraweeh and their intention will still be for Taraweeh, which will invalidate the Salah. It would be nice if they could announce Witr Salah in the Haram, otherwise we must keep a track of Rak’ahs.
Thieves
Keep your belongings with you at ALL times. In the hotel keep your suitcase and luggage locked, do not trust anyone, not even the workers. Take minimum money to the Haram, 40-50 Riyal. You should not need more than that, maximum 100 Riyal. The day you decide to go shopping, take extra money. But on a daily basis, you might need money for a drink/ice cream or something to eat. There are thieves everywhere! As blessed as Haramayn Shareefayn are, unfortunately the thieves are NOT. They will cut your pockets and run. Men should try and sew pockets into their trousers for safety. Keep your mobile and money in there. Women keep small handbags and keep them close to you, not dangling off your shoulder. Then there are other thieves or beggars who make stories up! They lost their passports or documents. Or even say they lost their wife and children. I personally do not give a Riyal to any of these guys, not because I am stingy but I want my money to go to the right place. If you don’t believe me, read this:
https://babarahmad.com/2016/08/29/pilgrims-guide-to-predators-on-hajj/
If you want to give Sadaqah or Zakah give it to the cleaners in Haram. With Zakah, you have to let them know it is Zakah.
If your belongings do get stolen or lost, there is a lost and found office called “daftarul mafqoodaat” in Arabic. It is near Safa and Marwa but far, far behind it. You have to go outside and it is a long walk, I’ll be honest. Try praying these duas:
فِيهِ آيَاتٌ بَيِّنَاتٌ مَّقَامُ إِبْرَاهِيمَ
In it are clear signs (among which is) the Maqam-e-Ibrahim.
Maqam-e-Ibrahim refers to the stone on which Nabi Ibrahimﷺ would stand when he was building the Ka‘bah. As the height of the building rose, the stone would automatically rise, lifting Nabi Ibrahimﷺ so that he could continue to build the Ka’bah, and when it was time for Nabi Ibrahim ﷺ to return to the ground, the stone would automatically descend.
The impression of the blessed footprints of Nabi Ibrahim ﷺ can be seen in the stone until today. It is obviously a miracle for a stone to automatically rise and descend, based on the need of the person standing on it, and for a hard stone to soften sufficiently so that it could be imprinted with his footsteps. It is for this reason that Allah Ta‘ala says that the Maqam-e-Ibrahim contains clear signs (that will guide one to recognize Allah Ta‘ala).
The Maqam-e-Ibrahim is housed in a round structure made from glass and metal, located on the mataf, close to the door of the Ka‘bah.
‘Abdullah bin ‘Amr (radhiyallahu ‘anhu) reports that Rasulullah ﷺ said, “The Hajr-e-Aswad and Maqam-e-Ibrahim are two precious stones from the precious stones of Jannah. Allah Ta‘ala has extinguished their radiance. Had Allah not extinguished their radiance, they would have illuminated everything between the east and the west.” (Sunan Tirmidhi #878)
Take it easy
If you are going for Umrah in Ramadhan, take it easy as you are fasting as well as doing Tawaf and other acts of Ibadah. Sometimes just going to and from the Masjid can be tiring. Be sure to look after the elderly and those in your group too. If you are going for Hajj, do not tire yourself before Hajj. Some people do excessive Tawaf and Umrah before the days of Hajj then feel weak before Hajj. Remember you are “there for Hajj” make the most of it and be prepared for the 5 main days in sha Allah.
Waqf
Ibn Majah (757) narrated a hadeeth, “Whoever removes anything harmful from the mosque, Allah will build for him a house in Paradise.”
Anything found in the masjid is Waqf, please us it carefully, including the cups for Zamzam. Many people waste the cups and do not dispose of them correctly. A masjid MUST be kept clean; whether it is your local Masjid or Masjid Haram. Just because it is an extremely large Masjid does not mean it can be littered. Also on a side note, I would just like to mention here, many mothers make their children wear socks or t-shirts with picture or cartoons. This is completely Haraam! Please avoid this.
Purpose
Keep on remembering the purpose you are here for, and make a daily schedule/routine. When the heat overburdens you, remember the heat of hell fire. If you are stood in long queues or waiting amongst crowds of people, think of Qiyamah and the multitudes of people. I believe Haram Shareef is the only place you can depict Qiyamah, truly. When listening to the Qur’an in Salah, imagine the time when Jibreel AS descended upon the Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him).
Halal Food
Beware. Not all food is reliable in Saudi Arabia, especially chicken as we all know a LOT of the chicken is imported. Try and ask a reliable mufti saheb in the UK for an up to date list of reliable restaurants/takeaways. Please don’t be naive and think it is a Muslim country, so everything is Halal. Ask the workers if the chicken is “Watani” which means local/slaughtered in Saudi Arabia. When I went for Umrah in Ramadhan 2018, I asked Mufti Ibrahim Saheb Raja of Blackburn as Mufti saheb visits Haramayn ever year. He enumerated the following: in Makkah alTazaj in Bin Dawood and also the McDonald’s, he said near Ibrahim Khaleel road there are many Pakistani restaurants that serve Watani chicken, you just need to ask and confirm. In Madinah, there are much more. To name a few, Rawi, At-Tabakh, Nirala, Miraj and Dawoodiya.
Niqab
Ma Sha Allah! I will always praise and support women who wear the niqab, it is one of the greatest Jihads of the time – whether home or away. But, sadly, many women go to the holy lands and stop wearing their niqab or it becomes part-time. My dear sisters, simple advice is that you wear a niqab for many years. Some of you since you were teenagers. Not a single non-mahram has seen your face! Then you go for Hajj/Umrah and uncover your face because it’s too hot or at lunchtime for ease or in the hotel because you feel suffocated. Remember, there will be many men travelling with you from your locality and relatives who have never seen your face. Is it worth it for a few weeks to lose this modesty? Stay strong in sha Allah, Allah’s Jannah awaits you. You will be the queens of Jannah.
Madinah Munawwarah
Shaykh Haji Faruq Saheb (Allah have mercy on him) would say, on the road to Madinah try and pray Surah Kawthar 1000 times. Once you enter Madinah start continuous durood, so before you reach Masjid Nabwi ﷺ your salutations reach the beloved Prophet ﷺ.
“There are angels of Allah SWT who convey to me the salutations of the Ummah.” (an-Nisai)
Take a booklet of forty duroods and pray daily along with a fixed amount of other duroods, 100, 200 etc.
Read Seerah books beforehand or take one with you to inculcate the love of the Prophet ﷺ
The rule is not to harm anyone, anywhere. But in particular, make an extra effort in Madinah Shareef not to argue or cause inconvenience to anyone. Even the animals, birds, plants etc. This is the City of the Prophet ﷺ, the City of Mercy.
DO NOT COMPLAIN! If you do not like something, stay quiet. Women, in particular, have a habit of commenting and criticising negatively. Such silly mistakes can deprive someone of visiting the holy lands again. There is a famous story of a man who visited Madinah and had some yoghurt. He found the yoghurt sour and complained! The same night the Prophetﷺ came in his dream and said, “If you don’t like the yoghurt of my city, then don’t come again.”
Mount Uḥud even loves those who obey Allāh and His Messengerﷺ
“Uḥud is a mountain which loves us and which we love.” (Bukhārī)
Imām al-Nawawī (Allah have mercy upon him) comments and says: “Mount Uḥud truly loves us because Allāh has endowed it with a quality whereby it is able to feel love.” (Sharḥ al-Nawawī)
Salat was Salam upon our beloved Prophet ﷺ be done from anywhere in Masjid Nabwi but better in front of the Rawdhah Mubarak.
Try and pray at least two Rak’ah in Riyadhul Jannah, without pushing or causing inconvenience.
Shaykhul hadith Hadhrat Mawlana Muhammad Zakariyya (Allah have mercy upon him) would say, “When shopping in Madinah, make an intention to benefit the people of Madinah.” And I would like to add, do not haggle too much with the residents of Madinah.
Try and visit the place of Badr about 2 hours from Madinah Shareef. And there is a well on the way Bi’r Shifa. The water is known for Shifa/cure.
For those who do not know much about which dates to buy, I am no expert but the standard dates which people generally buy are:
Ajwa
Kalmi
Sukary
Safawi
Sugai
Ambar
Try and go to a date farm rather than the date market, the farms are not far from Masjid Nabwi ﷺ. And remember each type of date has its quality. E.g. You will get cheap Ajwa 40 or 50 Riyal per kilo but that will be low quality. Whereas the 60-70 Riyal per kilo will be higher quality, much larger and softer.
There are many suggestion boxes, usually near the doors/gates. Feel free to make positive suggestions. There are definitely many improvements to make in both places, we need to think of them and criticise constructively. We need to become a thinking Ummah, we need to produce deep thinkers in sha Allah. Also, take a notebook and pen and write down any thoughts you get. Sitting in the Haram you get some remarkable thoughts, don’t let them go! It could be changes to your life or something beneficial for the Ummah. Alhumdu Lillah, both parts of these blogs were a result of taking a notepad and jotting things down which I thought would benefit people. If you are a poet, writer, blogger, pen down your love and contemplations for these places to spread the respect and sanctity of these places. Here are two poems I wrote:
Lastly, use your time wisely and make it fruitful and productive. You never know when you will go again. Avoid arguments, this is not the place for arguments. Please don’t treat it like a holiday, you are not in Dubai or Morocco! They said in Arabic, “al-Istiqamah fawqa alf Karamah.” Steadfastness is better than 1,000 miracles! When you return back to the UK, keep up with your Salah, wearing Hijab or keeping a beard and practicing every Sunnah. Especially those Sunnah connected with Hijab. Reflect on your age and life. How you can change and remove sin and vice from your life.
Allah accept your Hajj/Umrah and make it easy and bring you back safely. Fi Amanillah.
Please pray for me too.
Ismail ibn Nazir Satia (One who is in dire need of Allah’s forgiveness, mercy and pleasure)
1 Dhul Qa’dah 1439
Seerah Poem Competition
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
I gave my class a competition when they finished their Seerah book, to write the summary of the Seerah in a poetic form. Here are the winners! Alhumdu Lillah…
He was born in the year when Abraha brought his elephants,
And it was the year Allah showed his benevolence.
Never knowing his father, his life was hard to fix,
But sadly, his mother also died when he was at the age of 6.
Now in the hands of Abdul Muttalib his life looked to be great,
It was a shame that this honoured man died when the Prophet SAW was only 8.
From then on, his uncle Abu Talib held the responsibility of his life,
And when the Prophet SAW was 25, Khadijah RA was to be his first wife.
With Khadijah RA, 2 boys and 4 girls he had,
A happy family they were and he was glad.
Gaining Prophethood at the age of of 40, he had an Ummah to make,
To serve Allah, he made it an opportunity that he would proudly take.
When it came to his wives, he had eleven,
And in one sitting he granted ten Sahabah RA Heaven.
From Makkah to Madinah he migrated with his Sahabah RA,
But he returned to do Hajj and do Tawaf of the Ka’bah.
Together they fought in in many battles for the sake of their Lord,
Passionately calling ‘Allahu Akbar’ as they up lifted up their swords.
At the age of 63, the Prophet Muhammad SAW sadly passed away,
However, the religion of Islam has lived on to this day.
Uwaiz Ebrahim Bahadur, 15 years old.
1st position.
When the truth was lost and hearts were locked,
Allah sent a Prophet to guide hearts which were lost.
The blessed Muhammad was born in Makkah.
He was sent to teach right from wrong,
To worship nobody besides Allah, who is the only one.
His Sunnah guided people who were astray,
It gave them a way of life, telling them how to behave.
The Prophet SAW told us Paradise or Hell,
To follow the Qur’an and act upon what is said.
He loved nobody more than his final Ummah,
Even as he lay on his deathbed he cried for his followers.
The moment he left this world,
He left 3 men in charge to ensure the beauty,
Of Islam reached everyone’s hearts.
Zubair Iqbal Patel, 18 years old.
2nd position.
About the Prophet Muhammad’s SAW Life
In the year 570 a special boy was born,
His name was Muhammad and deserved to take the throne.
He was born in Makkah where the beautiful Ka’bah was built by his beloved ancestors Ibraheem AS and Ismaeel AS,
The unfortunate demise of the Prophet’s father Abullah RA took place two months before he was born.
His mother Aminah RA sent him to Halimah Sadiyah to be nursed and be brought up by her,
After the 4 years he spend in the tribe of Saad, his respected mother passed away.
He then went to live with his courageous grandfather Abdul Muttalib, whose soul went after 2 years,
It was now the blessed Abu Talib’s turn, it was from him that the Prophet SAW started to learn.
The Prophet SAW was now 25 and he travelled to Syria at the request of Khadijah RA,
He then married her and had six children – 2 boys and 4 girls.
The 2 sons Abdullah and Qasim died when they were infants,
This was a tragic moment for him SAW,
And how can we forget his adopted son Zayd ibn Harithah RA?
His daughters, Zaynab, Ruqayyah, Umme Kulthum and Fatimah RA,
Two were married to Uthman RA and one to Ali RA.
As time went by, Islam grew and the Muslims had enemies,
They fought in wars like Badr where there were fewer than 400 men,
But the Makkans had more than 1,000 as enemy.
Islam spread far when the Prophet SAW became old, by 63
He was leading Maghrib Salah and could not continue, so told Abu Bakr to carry on.
This was an indication, to the next leader after him SAW,
Who was known as al-Siddique, the most truthful after him SAW.
Adam Irfan Mohammed, 11 years old.
2nd position
A Poem About The Prophet Muhammad SAW
He was born in the Year of the Elephant,
The Year of the Elephant is called Aamul Feel.
The Prophet SAW was cared by Halima RA, but when it was time to go,
Halima RA wanted him to stay some more.
When he returned, at age 6 his mother passed away,
This was a time of very tough days.
Then came along his beloved grandad Abdul Muttalib, who took him in his care,
His grandad was very just and very fair.
At the age of 25 he got married to a lady called Khadijah RA,
And later, in total he had 11 wives.
At the age of 40 he got Prophethood,
In Makkah there was a lot of evil and not much good.
He SAW became a Prophet, the last Prophet of Allah,
This Prophet made Islam reach very very far!
Abdullah Faizal Kalu, 9 years old.
3rd position.
by Shaykh Mawlānā Muhammad Saleem Dhorat hafizahullāh
Whenever the blessed name of our beloved Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam is mentioned, the one who is fortunate to utter this name and also the one who is fortunate to hear his name should, with utmost love and reverence, say, ‘sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam.’ Nowadays, there is great negligence amongst youth in this regard. Some years ago, with the now older generation, we would see such great love and enthusiasm in reciting salāh ‘alan nabī (durūd); whenever the following verse would be recited in the khuṭbah, everyone would read some formula of salāh ‘alan nabī:
Truly, Allāh and His angels send blessings upon the Prophet; O you who believe! Send salutations and abundant greetings upon him (too). (33:56)
This verse contains a command from Allāh ta‘ālā to send salāh ‘alan nabī as this is an action performed by both Allāh and His angels. However, for the youth nowadays this verse doesn’t bring any response. When it is recited we do not see anyone reading salāh ‘alan nabī audibly or even silently.
The ‘Ulamā have deduced from this verse that it is fard (compulsory) to send salutations and greetings upon the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam at least once in a lifetime. Thereafter, whenever one participates in any gathering, be it a dars (lesson) on the Qur’ān or ahādīth, a lecture or even an informal gathering, then the first time the blessed name of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam is mentioned it is wājib (obligatory) to read salāh ‘alan nabī; thereafter, every time, in the same gathering, whenever the blessed name is mentioned it is mustaḥab (desirable) to read salāh ‘alan nabī each time.
What Love Dictates
Remember, love and reverence for the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam dictates that even if the sharī‘ah had not stipulated that salāh ‘alan nabī be read when his blessed name is mentioned, we would still send salutations and greetings upon him in abundance.
So, whenever we hear the verse above read in a khutbah, we should read salāh ‘alan nabī. There are many formulae for salāh ‘alan nabī. The most virtuous is the formula that we read in salāh. The shortest formula is ‘sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam’. This is the formula commonly used by the Muhaddithūn and is probably the most frequently recited form.
Our love for the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam should be such that we should not think of it to be a burden; rather, we should be eager to read it whenever we can. If, during a lecture, the scholar is explaining a point and happens not to mention the name of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam for some time, we should feel that something is missing and eagerly await the mentioning of the blessed name so that we can say salāh ‘alan nabī.
Love and reverence for the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam also dictates that we do not shorten his name when writing it. Many, instead of writing ‘Muḥammad’ in full, suffice with writing ‘Mohd’. We write an article or letter of many pages and the only word that we find that we can shorten is the blessed name of the beloved of Allāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam! Similarly, many do not write, for example, ‘sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam’, sufficing with ‘s.a.w’. Again, in the whole letter, article, etc. are these the only words that we can find to shorten? There is a similar trend in the Urdu language where the letters ‘Sād’ or ‘Sād, Lām, ‘Ayn and Mīm’ are used to represent ‘sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam’. Ponder for a while that who is planting these thoughts in your mind about shortening the name and salutation for our beloved Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam. What does this show regarding our love and reverence for our beloved Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam?
Writing the Durūd
I remember when I was a student in Dār-al-‘Ulūm, the way we were taught by our elders and the culture in the Madrāsah was such that as the blessed name of the Prophet Sallallāhu ‘Alayhi Wasallam was mentioned again and again, it was very difficult to take down all the notes from the lectures and also write the name of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam with salutations. Therefore, in our notes, wherever we had to write the blessed name of the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam and salutations, we would leave out a blank space and after class, in our own time, with our best handwriting we would write the salutations in our note books.
I would also like to bring an important point to the attention of many lecturers, who speak with the most eloquent language and accents, yet, when it comes to salāh ‘alan nabī they quickly mumble the words, void of love and reverence. Is this the level of our love and reverence for our Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam?
Nothing but Benefit
In reading salāh ‘alan nabī there is nothing but benefit for us:
1. Allāh ta‘ālā sends ten mercies upon a person who recites salāh ‘alan nabī once.
2. Ten sins are forgiven.
3. The person’s rank is raised by ten degrees.
4. Ten rewards are written for him.
5. There is acceptance of du‘ā where salāh ‘alan nabī is recited at the beginning and at the end.
6. The person will be blessed with the intercession of Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam.
7. Allāh will forgive his sins.
8. Allāh is pleased with him.
9. The person will be nearer to the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam on the Day of Judgement.
10. The person will have all his worries removed in this world and the Hereafter.
The great luminary in the field of tazkiyah and ihsān, Shaykh-al-Hadīth, Shaykh, Mawlānā Muhammad Zakariyyā rahimahullāh would often receive letters regarding different problems, and he would reply with appropriate answers. However, one point he would emphasise on in every reply was to be punctual in the recitation of salāh ‘alan nabī.
“There is a solution to every problem in sending salutations upon Muhammad sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam.”
Daily Practice
Finally, the great shaykh, Shaykh Mawlānā Rashīd Aḥmad Gangohī rahimahullāh would instruct that salāh ‘alan nabī be read a minimum of 300 times daily by every Muslim. In the beginning, we could read the shortest formula of salāh ‘alan nabī mentioned above. After that we should try to recite salāh ‘alan nabī with the most virtuous salāh ‘alan nabī mixed in after every 10-15 of the shortest formula. This figure of 300 should be increased on the day of Friday, as the day of Friday has a special affinity with the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam.
May Allāh ta‘ālā enable us to read salāh ‘alan nabī in abundance and have true love and reverence for our beloved Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam.
The Messenger of Mercy SAW
I am a vagabond
Wayfaring the desert sands
You are an oasis
My life’s in your hands
I look upon a mountain
And you are it’s peak
You are the summit
Of every truth I seek
In the rivers and lakes
In the oceans and seas
You’re the blue in the sky
The greenery in the trees
I’m a smitten stargazer
You; the cosmos of my heart
You’re the entire universe;
Gods priceless verse of art
Here I am, yearning to be
The dust on your blessed shoe
I’m the beggar at your door
Your love is the alms I pursue
صلى الله عليه وآله وصحبه وسلم
Abu Esa Hashim.