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Poems

A Poem about the Last Prophet (pbuh)

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Before prophethood came, he SAW spent his time in a cave,

One day an angel from Allah appeared,

And the first words were revealed.

He SAW quickly went home to his wife Khadijah in fear,

She RA comforted him and all worries she made disappear.

 

Khadijah RA was the first believer then Abu Bakr RA was selected,

Not many people believed in the message and rejected.

This orphan boy grew up to be a Prophet of Allah SAW,

He SAW was remembered wide and far.

 

He SAW was known to be an honest man, he didn’t ever lie,

He SAW used to spend his nights in prayer, for the Ummah he did cry.

He SAW just wanted the world to be in peace,

And for His SAW message to spread to the wide West and far in the East.

Rashida Leicester 20170831_231707.jpg

Umar Sarfaraz Patel, 8 years old.

Categories
Personalities

Khadijah RA – The Prophet’s Beloved

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

http://happymuslimfamily.org/khadijah-the-prophets-beloved-the-princess-of-quraysh/

“She believed in me when the whole world refuted me and she attested to my trueness when the whole world accused me of falsehood. She offered me compassion and loyalty with her wealth when everyone else had forsaken me.”

[Prophet Muhammad (SAW) – Narrated by Musnad Ahmad]

Khadijah (Allah be pleased with her) the first wife of the Prophet (saws), is a figure of great inspiration to the Muslim women.

She was the first to believe in the message of Muhammad (SAW).

She proved to be the Prophet’s (SAW) steadfast ally at all times.

She shared in all his troubles and difficulties.

She was always the first to offer him cover and support.

She gave him love and advice whenever he needed it.

At the age of forty, a widow and a wealthy business-woman, Khadijah (ra) married the Prophet (SAW) when he was twenty-five, in what proved to be a relationship of profound love, loyalty and friendship.

Hadith about Khadijah

Her Background

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) was born in Makkah in the year 556 CE. Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) belonged to a tribe of the Quraysh Clan, the Banu Asad. Her father was Khuwaylid bin Asad, and her mother – Fatima bint Zaidah – belonged to the Luayy tribe. Her father was a very popular leader among the tribe of Quraysh, and a very prosperous businessman who died while fighting in the famous battle of Fujjar. Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) thus grew up in the lap of luxury.

Khadijah’s (radhi Allahu anha) first husband was ‘Atiq bin ‘A’idh, a respectable figure from the Makhzum tribe. She bore him a daughter named Hindah. After Atiq died, Khadijah married Abu Hala Malak ibn Nabash. She bore him two sons with the (usually feminine) names of Hind and Hala.

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) was a very distinguished and affluent member of the Quraysh, and was generally regarded as an exceptionally chaste, pure, and abstemious lady. Due to all that, she was known by the by-names Ameerat-Quraysh (“Princess of Quraysh”), al-Tahira (“The Pure One”) and Khadijah Al-Kubra (Khadijah “the Great”).

Khadijah (ra) as a Business Woman

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) was a wealthy, well-known and prosperous lady in Makkah. She was a merchant and used to send her goods via the trade caravans to Ash-Sham (Syria) and Yemen.

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) inherited her business from her father. Her astuteness and business ability made her business one of the most widespread businesses among the Quraysh. It is said that when the Quraysh’s trade caravans gathered to embark upon their summer journey to Ash-Sham (Syria) or winter journey to Yemen, Khadijah’s caravan equaled the caravans of all other traders of the Quraysh put together. It is said that she fed and clothed the poor, assisted her relatives financially and provided marriage portions for poor relations.

Trade of the people of Makkah used to be based on travelling to Yemen and Ash-Sham (Syria). Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha)did not travel with her trade caravans; she employed others to trade on her behalf for a commission.  The Arab society at that time was a male-dominant society, so we can imagine how hard it would have been for a woman to run her business in such an environment. That’s why she had to hire men to do business for her. It was like companies hire “business managers” today.

Arab trade caravan

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) hires Muhammad (SAW) as a Business Manager

In 595 CE, Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha)needed an agent for a business trip to Syria. As we know that the society in Makkah was a very corrupt society in the times of jahiliyyah, she was most probably running into trouble with a lot of “business managers” who were not being honest, so she wanted to hire somebody who was trustworthy.

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) had heard of the integrity, honesty and principled behavior Muhammad (saws).The experience that Muhammad (saws) held working with caravans in his uncle Abu Talib’s family business had earned him the honorific titles Al-Sadiq (“the Truthful”) and Al-Amin (“the Trustworthy” or “Honest”).

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) Muhammad (SAW), who was then 25 years old, making the deal that she would pay double her usual commission. [Ibn Sa’d’s Tabaqat al-Kabir] Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) sent him on a business trip to Ash-Sham and sent one of her servants, Maysarah, to accompany and assist him.

During the trip to Ash-Sham, Maysarah was impressed by the Prophet’s (SAW) integrity, strength of character, adherence to principles, his amicable dealings and his business abilities.

On the way back from Syria, the Prophet (SAW) lay down under a tree to rest for a while. Nestora, a Jewish monk who was known for his knowledge of religion and for his insight, saw him and asked Maysarah who he was. Maysarah told him all about Muhammad (SAW) and his reputation for honesty and intelligence. Nestora informed Maysarah that this man would be elevated to Prophethood in the future. Nestora said:

“None but a prophet ever sat beneath this tree.”

It is also narrated that on the same trip, once while Maysarah was standing near Muhammad (SAW) as he slept, he saw two angels standing above Muhammad creating a cloud to protect him from the heat and glare of the sun.

Khadijah becomes interested in Muhammad (SAW)

Upon returning from Ash-Sham, Maysarah gave accounts of the honorable way that Muhammad had conducted his business, with the result that he brought back twice as much profit as Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) had expected. Maysarah also reported to Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) accounts about the Jewish monk and the two angles providing shade over Muhammad (SAW).

At this, Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) was deeply moved and impressed and became very interested in Muhammad (SAW). She found herself attracted to Muhammad (SAW) emotionally and thought to propose marriage to him.

One could imagine what she would have been thinking at that time. How could she express her thoughts to him? As Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) a wealthy woman, many wealthy and noble men from Quraysh had already asked for her hand in marriage, but she had rejected all those proposals. How could she face those nobles of Quraysh whom she refused before? How would her tribe react? What would her family say? And most importantly, would her proposal be acceptable to this young, yet unmarried man of 25 years of age when she was a widowed woman of 40 years of age?

As she pondered over these questions and debated within herself, one night she had a dream in which the sun descended from the sky into her courtyard, fully illuminating her home.

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) consulted her cousin Warqah ibn Nawfal, a blind man known for his skill in interpreting dreams, and for his depth of knowledge, particularly of the Torah and the Injil. Warqah said that if what Maysarah had seen was true, then Muhammad (SAW) was in fact the prophet of the people who was already expected.

Regarding her dream, Warqah told her not to be alarmed, as this was a very promising dream. The glorious sun she saw descending into her courtyard was an indication that the Prophet (SAW) whose advent had been predicted in the Torah and the Injil was to grace her home.

After this meeting with Warqah, Khadijah (ra) became stronger in her desire to marry Muhammad (saws).

Marriage Proposal to Muhammad (SAW)

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) one of her very close friends named Nafisah bint Manbah to approach Muhammad (SAW) and ask if he would consider marrying. The following conversation took place between the two:

Nafisah: “Oh Muhammad, what is preventing you from getting married?”

Muhammad: “I do not have enough money to get married!”

Nafisah: “If that was taken care of, then would you accept an invitation to wealth, beauty, repute, and partnership?”

Muhammad: “Who is she?”

Nafisah: “Khuwaylid’s daughter, Khadijah”

Muhammad: “But how can it be?”

Nafisah: “Everything will be taken care of.”

Muhammad: “In that case, I accept”.

[Narrated in Tabaqat Ibn Sa’d]

Nafisah instantly went to Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha)to tell her the good news. Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) was overjoyed.

After this, they consulted their respective uncles. Muhammad (SAW) told his uncles, Abu Talib and Hamza (radhi Allahu anho), about his wish to marry Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha). His uncles agreed to the marriage. Khadijah’s (radhi Allahu anha) father had passed away in the Battle of Fujjar. For this reason, they approached her uncle, Amr bin Asad, to make a formal proposal to Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha).  Khadijah’s (radhi Allahu anha) Amr Ibn Asad accepted the proposal, and the two families began preparing for the wedding.

Khadijah - Muhammad Wedding

The Marriage Ceremony

The date of the marriage ceremony was determined by Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) the ceremony was to take place in her home. The Prophet (saws), his uncles, his aunts, and some of the leading figures from the sons of Hashim came to Khadijah’s home on the set date.

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) provided everything that would ensure a beautiful wedding ceremony. The sheep were slaughtered and the food was prepared.

After the food was eaten, it was time for the oldest ones on both sides to speak, which was in accordance with their custom. Her uncle, Amr bin Asad, was her representative for the ceremony.

According to the tradition, Abu Talib would be the first to speak. Therefore, he stood up and said: “Thanks be to God for he has created us from Ibrahim’s progeny, Ismail’s bloodline, Maad’s minerals, and Mudar’s descent. After this, I get straight to the point and say:

“As you know, my brother’s son, Muhammad bin Abdullah, is your relative. No youth from the Quraysh can be compared to him. He is superior to them in terms of repute, intelligence, honor, and virtue.

“Yes, he has very little property, but what does that mean? It is a transient shadow and curtain, something temporary that is given and then taken away.

“I swear by God that his rank is going to increase and grow even more from now on.

“He now asks for your daughter Khadija’s hand in marriage and pledges to give 20 male camels for her dowry.”

When Abu Talib finished speaking, Khadija’s cousin, Warqah bin Nawfal, rose to speak. He said:

“Thanks be to God for He has created us like you have described. He has granted us a far greater degree of superiority than you have mentioned. We also want to be honored and establish kinship with you.

“Oh, the community of Quraysh! Bear witness that I marry Khuwaylid’s daughter, Khadija, to Muhammad, the son of Abdullah, for the price of this dowry”.

When Warqah bin Nawfal had finished speaking, Abu Talib wanted Khadija’s paternal uncle, Amr bin Asad, to express his consent. Amr also rose to his feet and said, “Oh the community of Quraysh, bear witness that I have joined Muhammad bin Abdullah and Khuwaylid’s daughter, Khadija in marriage.”

Khadijah (ra) and her mother, Fatima, were very happy at the occasion and ordered the maid servants to arrange for some small tambourines to be played to enliven the house.

Halimah As-Sa’diyyah who nursed the Prophet in his infancy was specially invited for the wedding and traveled to Makkah from her village. When she left after the festivities, Khadijah presented her with household goods, a camel and forty goats as an expression of gratitude to the lady who had taken such good care of Muhammad (saws) in his infancy.

Thus, the Master of the Universe (saws) was married to Khuwaylid’s daughter, Hazrat Khadijat ul-Kubra, who had the most reputable ancestry as well as the most honor and wealth among the Qurayshi women. At that time, Muhammad (saws) was 25 years old whereas Hazrat Khadija was 40. Their marriage took place in 595 CE; 15 years before his Prophethood.

After the ceremony, Prophet (saws) brought his esteemed wife with him to Abu Talib’s home. Here they slaughtered two camels and threw a banquet for the community.

Out of regard for this happy occasion, Abu Talib slaughtered his camels and fed the community and then afterwards, invited Muhammad (saws) and his family to his home.

When he went out to greet them, he thanked God in the midst of his tears by saying, “Praise to be God for He has dispelled all of our sadness away from us.”

Prophet Muhammad (saws) and Khadijah (ra) only stayed a few days in Abu Talib’s home. Afterwards, they returned to Khadija’s home in which they would spend their blissful lives.

The Master of the Universe (saws) did not marry anyone else while this pure woman was alive. [Seerah ibn Hisham]

Khadijah’s (radhi Allahu anha)relationship with the Prophet (SAW)

In spite of the disparity between their economic position and age, the marriage proved to be extremely successful. Allah (SWT) had a great plan in choosing Khadija to become the Prophet’s (SAW) wife. Khadija (radhi Allahu anha) mature and influential; she was to become the helper, the assistant, the supporter, and the shield of Muhammad (SAW). Enormous responsibility was to be bestowed upon him. To bear such a duty may have been too demanding a task for a younger woman.

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) married to Prophet Mohammed (SAW) for 24 years, 5 months, and 8 days. Ibn Ishaq relates that whenever the Prophet (saws) would feel troubled by the accusations and abuse that were meted out against him by people, Khadijah would reassure him, alleviate his troubles, lighten his burden, and ease his difficulties by her attestation and acceptance of his claim. [Seerah ibn Hisham]

The secret of the success of this extraordinary marriage lay in the fact that its foundations were based on the virtuous disposition of both. In her proposal of marriage to Muhammad (SAW), Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) that she was inclined towards him due to the beauty of his virtuous character. After marriage, their relationship grew stronger in love and trust.

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) allowed him independence from all kinds of financial worries, and sacrificed everything for the cause of his Prophethood. Hence, Prophet Muhammad (SAW) once said,

“Khadijah aided me with her wealth at a time when no one else did.” [Masnad Ahmad]

Once, Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) observed the Prophet Muhammad’s (saws) empathy for one of her slaves, Zaid bin Harisa (ra), and the manner in which he appreciated and praised his services. As a result, she bequeathed him to the Prophet (SAW), and in turn, the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) set him free. [Seerah ibn Hisham]

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) the love and devotion with which the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) undertook his prayers, and always sought to support and assist the performance of his spiritual duties. She would take it upon herself to prepare his provisions when he would seek solitude in the cave of Hira to worship.

The First Wahi

Perhaps the most well-known and emotional impact is the incidence when the Muhammad (SAW) returned after he received the first revelation from the cave of Hira, having witnessed the angel Jibreel (AS).

Shivering, realizing somewhat what a massive responsibility laid ahead of him.
Trembling, understanding that his life would change forever.
Afraid, fearing for his safety.

Cave Hira where first revelation of Quran came to Muhammad

The experience terrified him, and he ran home and cried to Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha), “Cover me! Cover me!” She was startled by his terror, and after soothing and comforting him for a while, the Prophet (saws) was able to calm down and tell her about his experience and said, “I fear that something may happen to me.” [Bukhari]

The Prophet (SAW) thought he was going mad or being possessed.

At this crucial juncture, Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) provided her husband with courage and solace. Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha)put all his fears to rest. She said:

“Do not worry, for by Him who has dominion over Khadijah’s soul, I hope that you are the Prophet of this nation. Allah would never humiliate you, for you keep good relations with your kith and kin, you are true to your word, you help those who are in need, you support the weak, you feed the guest and you answer the call of those who are in distress.”

Attestation by Warqah bin Naufal

In addition to her reassuring words, she took him to her cousin Warqah bin Naufal, a Christian scholar well-versed in Hebrew, and who possessed extensive knowledge of the Torah and the Gospels. After listening to the Prophet Muhammad (saws), Waraqah bin Naufal said:

“This is the same angel that was sent down to Moses (as). Alas! I wish I were young and healthy in this age, when your people will oust you from this land.”

The Prophet Muhammad (saws) asked in astonishment, “Will my people oust one such as me (meaning bearer of good and servant to mankind)?” Warqah said, “Indeed! It has always been so in the past.” [Bukhari]

Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) once asked the Prophet Muhammad (saws) about Warqah bin Naufal, “O Prophet of Allah! Although he believed in you after your first revelation, he died shortly afterwards.” The Prophet Muhammad (saws) replied,

“Yes, I saw him in a dream of mine and he was clad in white. If he was of the inmates of the fire, then he would not have been dressed so.” [Kanzul Ummal]

One of the First 3 Muslims

Can you imagine there was a time when there were only 3 Muslims on the face of earth! One Muhammad (saws), the 2nd was Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha)and the 3rd was Ali bin Abi Talib (radhi Allahu anha)! Subhan Allah!

Ali ibn Abi Talib (radhi Allahu anha) says:

“In those days Islam was observed only in one house, in which Holy Prophet (saws) and Khadijah (ra) resided and I was the third one (in the house).”

There is a truly beautiful story told by Yahya ibn Afeef about an occasion when he visited Makkah to stay with Abbas ibn Abd al-Muttalib, one of the uncles of Prophet Muhammad (saws).

When the sun started rising, he said, “I saw a man who came out of a place not far from us, faced the Kaaba, and started performing his prayers. He hardly started before being joined by a young boy who stood on his right side, then by a woman who stood behind them. When he bowed down, the young boy and the woman bowed, and when he stood up straight, they, too, did likewise. When he prostrated himself, they, too, prostrated themselves.”

Then he expressed his amazement at that, saying to Abbas ibn Abd al-Muttalib, “This is quite strange, Abbas!”

“Is it really?” retorted Abbas ibn Abd al-Muttalib, who asked his guest if he knew who this man was and went on to tell him, “He is Muhammad ibn Abdullah, my nephew. Do you know who the young boy is?”

When Yahya ibn Afeef said that he didn’t know, he was told, “He is Ali ibn Abi Talib. Do you know who the woman is?” The answer came again in the negative, to which Abbas ibn Abd al-Muttalib said, “She is Khadijah bint Khuwaylid, my nephew’s wife”. [Ahmad and Tirmidhi]

So we can say that Khadijah (ra) was an “eye-witness” of the birth of Islam. She nursed it through its infancy, through its most difficult, and through its most formative years.

Allah gives salam to Khadijah!

Once Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) set out towards the northern parts of Makkah with provisions, in search of the Prophet Muhammad (saws). On her way, the angel Jibrael (as) appeared before her and enquired about the Prophet Muhammad (saws). Khadijah (ra) became anxious since an unknown man was asking about her husband. Upon meeting the Prophet (saws), she related the earlier encounter, to which he replied:

“That was Jibrael (as) and he said to give Salam to you.”

Narrated Abu Hurairah:

Jibrael (as) came to the Prophet (saws) and said: “O Allah’s Messenger! This is Khadijah, coming to you with a dish having meat soup (or some food or drink). When she reaches you, give her salam on behalf of her Lord (Allah) and on my behalf, and give her the glad tidings of having a palace made of Qasab in Paradise, wherein there will be neither any noise nor any toil, (fatigue, trouble, etc.).” [Bukhari]

That is how special Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) was; in the eyes of Allah, Jibrael and Muhammad (saws). Allahsubhanahu wa ta’ala sends down His salam to Khadijah (ra) and then Jibrael is adding his own salam to it! Can you imagine receiving salam from Allah (swt) Himself! Doesn’t that make you cry! Also Allah gave her the glad tidings of a palace made of Qasab in paradise. Subhan Allah!

The glad tidings concerning Khadijah’s (ra) abode in Paradise was a significant tribute to her character.

  1. Allah (swt) predestined a glasshouse of pearls and gems for Khadijah (ra), a house mirroring her pure and sincere heart.
  2. She filled her home with peace and made it heavenly for the Prophet (saws) during her lifetime. Rewarding this, Allah sent forth a message of glad tidings of her eternal abode in heaven.
  3. Just as she caused no fatigue to reach the Prophet (saws) through her care and support, her eternal abode shall know no fatigue either.

Khadijah (ra) as a Mother

Khadijah (ra) was very blessed in the marriage, and had six children. Two sons, Qasim and ‘Abdullah; and four daughters, Zaynab, Ruqayyah, Umm Kulthum and Fatimah. None of them ended up having descendants except Fatima, and that is where the lineage of Rasul ullah saws is continuing; through the descendants of Fatima and Ali.

The four daughters grew up to be faithful and courageous daughters of Islam. They all migrated to Al-Madinah, with the Prophet (saws).

Zaynab was married to Abu ‘Aas bin Rabi’ah, Ruqayyah was married to ‘Uthman. When she passed away ‘Uthman married her sister Umm Kulthum; Fatimah was married to ‘Ali bin Abi Talib. The first three daughters died during the lifetime of Muhammad (saws) and his beloved daughter Fatimah lived just six months after he passed away.

All the male children borne by Khadijah (ra) passed away during her lifetime. Following the pure example of Prophet Muhammad (saws), she too bore with great patience the trial and adversity of losing her children. Qasim was not yet weaned when he passed away, yet Khadijah (ra) showed a great example of patience. Only once did she say to the Prophet Muhammad (saws):

“O Prophet of Allah! The lactating days of Qasim were not yet over. If only Allah had permitted him a few more days, he would have finished his two years of lactation. Would it not have been wonderful and we would have spent some more time with our child.”

The Prophet Muhammad (saws) replied,

“He will complete his lactating days in Paradise.”

Khadijah (ra) replied,

“If that was to be believed, it would ease the grief that I bear for Qasim.”

The Prophet Muhammad (saws) said:

“If you wish, I shall pray to Allah that He may let you hear your son’s voice so that you may believe that he will indeed finish his lactating days in Paradise. Thus you may feel reassured.”

Khadijah (ra) answered with great promptness and presence of mind by replying,

“O Prophet of Allah! I believe what Allah and His messenger say and accept it to be the truth.” [Sunan Ibn Majah]

Khadijah’s House: The Center of Islam

The Prophet (saws) lived in Khadijah’s house. It was in her home that Angel Jibrael was bringing Revelations from Heaven for ten years. So her home became the “home” of Glorious Qur’an – the Book of Allah (SWT), and the religious and political code of Islam.

All the Companions, male and female, would visit her house often to partake of the hospitality of Muhammad (saws) and his wife. So it became the center of Islam.

The site of the house in Makkah thought to belong to Khadija (ra)

We can say that Islam was given shape and design in her home. If any home can be called the cradle of Islam, it was her home; she “reared” Islam. If any home can be called the “axis” of Islam, it was her home; Islam revolved around her home.

After the Hijrah (migration) of the Prophet (saws) to Al-Madinah, the house was occupied by the brother of ‘Ali. Later Mu’awiyah bin Abu Sufyan (who transcribed some of the Divine Revelations) purchased this house and built a mosque. Thus the site of the house of Khadijah became a place of prayer and worship for all time.

She helped Islam by her wealth

Not only did she help the Prophet (saws) emotionally, but financially as well. She spent her money to help the small but growing community of believers and gave up many comforts in order to support the noble cause.

She was the richest woman in Makkah and she sacrificed all her wealth for the cause of Islam. She was a leader and a pillar of her community and the backbone of Islam. There is a famous saying:

“Islam did not rise except through Ali’s sword and Khadijah’s wealth.”

One may ask this question: how was a widowed woman able to use her wealth for the cause of Islam?

As a business woman, she was managing a huge business and excelled to the point that she was nicknamed Ameerat-Quraysh, i.e. “The Princess of Quraysh”. For a widowed woman, having and running a successful business in a society that was male-dominated would not have been that easy. And it was this prosperous business of hers that enabled her to earn the riches that were used to help the cause of Islam.

As Muslims, we learn two lessons from this:

  1. Being rich per se is not something bad in itself. Money has become a taboo in our Muslim societies, which is a wrong concept. There is a feeling of guilt associated with having lots of money. This wrong belief sometimes hold the Muslims back from having successful businesses or having a successful career. Islam has never encouraged poverty. Khadija (ra), Uthman ibn Affan (ra) and Abdur Rahman ibn Awf would never have been able to help Islam through their wealth, if they were not rich.
  2. We should not discourage Muslim women to become entrepreneurs or start their own businesses. If our daughters want to do something BIG for the world or start a crazy project, we should not discourage them. We should teach them to develop their characters just like Khadijah (ra) and aim for the best in both this world and the next. Let’s raise our daughters up to become modern day Khadijahs!

Khadijah’s Sacrifices for Islam

After accepting Islam, Khadijah (ra) faced trials and hardships with respect to the breakup of her daughters’ marriages. Her daughters Ruqayya (ra) and Umm-e-Kulsoom (ra) were married to Utba and Utaiba respectively, who were sons of Abu Lahab, uncle of the Prophet (saws). After claiming prophethood, the opposition in Makkah grew, during which time the Quraish instigated the two sons to divorce the daughters of the Prophet Muhammad (saws). [Seerah Ibn Hisham & Tabaqat Ibn Sa’d]

As a result, both marriages were dissolved. Khadijah (ra) bore the pain of her daughters with great strength. No word of impatience or displeasure crossed her lips. Indeed this was a great test by Allah (swt) but her reaction to such tests bore testimony to her sabr and to the strength of herimaan.

After that, she was tested by Allah (swt) once again. From the 7th year of Nabawi, the tribe of Banu Hashim was besieged and boycotted in Shi‘b-e-Abi-Talib for 3 years. Khadijah (ra) spent those three years in conditions of great difficulty with the Prophet Muhammad (saws).

The political and social boycott was so severe that innocent children faced starvation and hunger, and adults survived eating the leaves of trees. Yet the firm followers of Muhammad did not turn away from their true religion and they came out of the ordeal stronger and purer than before.

Sha’ib Abi Talib

So here’s the richest woman of Quraysh, facing a situation where they have to eat the leaves of trees to survive. Subhan Allah! She chose to bear the grief and pain of the siege for the cause of Allah and His Messenger (saws). She chose a righteous path and stayed with the Prophet Muhammad (saws) until the day of her death.

Khadijah’s Death: The Year of Grief

Khadijah (ra) passed away just three years before the Hijrah (migration) to Madinah. She died at the age of sixty-five, having given almost twenty-five years to Muhammad (saws). When Muhammad (saws) saw her in the throes of death he consoled her saying Allah had so ordained it, and that the thing she was dreading, would prove favorable for her. Her eyes lit up and as she gazed at her beloved husband, her soul left its earthly body.

Her grave was prepared at a place called Hujjun, near Makkah. Muhammad (saws) stepped into it to see that everything was as it should be, and with his own hands lowered her gently into it. Thus, passed away the ‘Mother’ of all Muslims, the one who had sacrificed her all for Islam, the lady who was the greatest supporter of Islam in its earliest days. She who was the mother of Fatimah, the First Lady of Paradise, the grandmother of the beloved grandchildren of the Prophet (saws) Hasan and Hussein who are to be the foremost of the youths in Paradise.

When she passed away, one of the ladies of the Quraysh, Khawlah bint Hakim, visited the Prophet (saws) to console him, and saw his state of depression and grief and remarked on it. He replied it was only natural that he should be touched by her absence, as she had been a loving mother to his now neglected children; she had been a loyal and sympathetic wife who shared his secrets.

The Prophet (saws) was heartbroken at the loss of a dedicated companion who stood by him during the most difficult period of his life. It is no wonder, then, that Muhammad (saw) never really got over her death. She meant so much to the Prophet (saws) and to Islam that he called the year of her death ‘Aam ul-Huzn, i.e. “The Year of Grief”.

Khadijah, one of the four greatest women!

Khadijah (ra) is one of the four greatest women that ever lived. ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Abbas narrated that:

“One day the Prophet (saws) drew four lines on the earth and asked his Companions if they understood what these lines stood for. They respectfully replied that he knew better. He then told them that these lines stood for the four foremost ladies of the universe. They were Khadijah bint Khuwaylid, Fatimah bint Muhammad, Maryam bint Imran, the mother of the Prophet Issa and ‘Asiyah bint Muzahim (the wife of the Pharaoh).”

It should be noted here that the greatest of all of them is Maryam, proven by the verse of Quran:

Aale-Imran-3-42

And (remember) when the angels said: “O Maryam! Verily, Allah has chosen you, purified you (from polytheism and disbelief), and chosen you above the women of the ‘Alamin (mankind and jinns) (of her lifetime).” [Aal-e-Imran: 42]

All of these four greatest women had something to do with a Prophet; Maryam was the mother of Prophet Isaa (as), Asiyah brought up Prophet Musa (as), Khadijah was the wife of Muhammad (saws) and Fatima was his daughter.

The Prophet’s (saws) High Regard for Khadijah

The Prophet (saws) spoke highly of Khadijah’s characteristics. He once said:

“Khadijah is better and above all other women.” [Musnad Ahmad]

The Prophet (saws) loved her so much, and he kept his loyalty to Khadijah (ra) even after she passed away. Not only would he always remember her, he kept on maintaining a relationship with her friends. The Prophet saws sometimes would slaughter a sheep and send it to the friends of Khadijah (ra). ‘A’ishah (ra) related that whenever an animal would be slaughtered, the Prophet (saws) would name all of Khadijah’s friends and say:

“Send a portion to that house, for she loved Khadijah dearly. Send a portion to that house, for she was a friend of Khadijah.”

‘A’ishah (radhi Allahu anha) said that she once asked the reason for this, to which the Prophet Muhammad (saws) replied,

“Those who were dear to Khadijah are dear to me too.” [Narrated by Al-Tabarani Al-Kabir]

‘A’ishah (radhi Allahu anha) relates that once an old lady came to the house of the Prophet (saws). The Prophet (saws) asked her, “Who are you?” She said, “I am from the neighbourhood of the Muzeena clan.”

After that, every time she came to visit, the Prophet (saws) would hold her high in esteem, and express happiness upon her visit. He would ask: “How are you? How is everything? How have you been doing since we last met?” ‘A’ishah (radhi Allahu anha) says that she once asked the Prophet (saws), “O Prophet of Allah! Why do you shower such care and attention over this old lady?” The Prophet (saws) replied:

“This old lady used to come to our house in Khadijah’s time, and loyalty is a part of faith too. Through this old lady, I recall the time I spent with Khadijah.” [Narrated by Al Mustadrak lil-Hakim and Al-Tabarani Al-Kabir]

The Story of Khadija’s Necklace

During the battle of Badr, Abdul-Aas, son-in-law to the Prophet (saws) and husband of Zainab (ra), was captured along with other non-Muslims from Makkah. At the time, Zainab (ra) was residing in Makkah. In exchange for the freedom of her husband, she offered the necklace her mother had given her at the time of her marriage as payment.

Upon seeing and recognizing the necklace, the Prophet Muhammad (saws) was stirred and overwhelmed with emotion. What an extraordinary moment it was to behold when his eyes shed tears at the memory of her kindness!

He consulted his Companions over granting freedom to Abdul-Aas without payment. As a result, the necklace was returned to Zainab (radhi Allahu anha), and remained a keepsake memory of her noble mother Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha).

However, Abdul-Aas was released on the terms that upon his return to Makkah, he would arrange safe passage for his Muslim wife, Zainab (radhi Allahu anha), the daughter of the Prophet Muhammad (saws), to Madinah. [Abu Daud]

Abdul-Aas, proved loyal and true to his word. Upon his return to Makkah, according to his promise, he made arrangements for Zainab (radhi Allahu anha) to be transported to Madinah, where the Prophet (saws) was residing.

The Prophet (saws) never forgot the good deed done by his son-in-law. He used to say, “Abu-ul-Aas is a righteous man in that he fulfilled the promise that he made to me.” [Bukhari] It was this very righteousness that enabled Abu-ul-Aas to accept Islam in the end.

‘A’ishah’s (radhi Allahu anha) Feeling of Jealousy

‘A’ishah (radhi Allahu anha) narrated:

“I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet (saws) as much as I did of Khadijah though I did not see her, but the Prophet (saws) used to mention her very often”. [Bukhari]

‘A’ishah (radhi Allahu anha) relates that Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha) died three years before her marriage. Every time, before leaving the house, the Prophet Muhammad (saws) would talk fondly about Khadijah (ra).

“I became weary of hearing of her all the time. For this reason I never felt any indignation against any of the wives except for Khadijah (ra). The Prophet (saws) would say that Allah has given me glad tidings in a revelation of a resting place for her in Paradise. Once, Khadijah’s (radhi Allahu anha) sister, Hala, came to our house and she asked permission to come in. Due the similarity between her voice and Khadijah’s (radhi Allahu anha) voice, the Prophet (saws) recognized her beforehand and said, ‘Dear God! It is Hala who has come.’ At this exclamation, I felt a strong sense of indignation and said,

‘O Prophet of Allah! Why is it that of all the old women of Quraish, you keep mentioning only one, she who died a long time ago? Allah has blessed you with better wives than her since then. You mention Khadijah as if there is no woman but her on earth.’

The Prophet Muhammad (saws) took amiss at these words and his face showed such signs of anger that I felt limp. I prayed to Allah that if his anger were to fade today, I would never again in my life say another word against Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha). At that point, looking at my countenance, the Prophet Muhammad (saws) said to me,

‘O ‘A’ishah! The truth of the matter is that no one can be better than Khadijah. She believed in me when the whole world refuted me and she attested to my trueness when the whole world accused me of falsehood. She offered me compassion and loyalty with her wealth when everyone else had forsaken me. O ‘A’ishah! What can I do? Love for her runs in my blood and is nestled in my heart.’” [Narrated by Masnad Ahmad]

Hadith about Khadijah

Conclusion

I cannot find any love story more powerful, more spiritually uplifting, and more awe-inspiring than that of the Prophet Muhammad (saws) and Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha). It is a shining example of what an ideal marriage is. If a Muslim ever claims that he loves his wife, he must gauge his actions with that of the Prophet (saws). If a Muslimah ever claims that she loves her husband, she must gauge her actions with that of Khadijah(radhi Allahu anha).

The history of Islam wouldn’t be the same without Khadijah (ra). Let us spread this beautiful love story of Khadijah (radhi Allahu anha). Use the icons below or on the left-hand side to share this article on Facebook, Twitter and other social media platforms.

Remember, the Prophet (saws) said:

“Convey from me even if it be one ayah (verse), for it may be that the one being informed will comprehend better that the one listening (at present).” [Bukhari]

So let’s share this story all over the internet, insha Allah!

Also give me feedback in the comments section below. How did you feel about this story of the Princess of Quraysh? What lessons, as a husband or wife, do you get from this story of the Prophet’s (saws) house?

And in the end,

Let us give our Salam to this noble and grand woman, one to whom Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala, the Master and Creator of this Universe sent His Salam!

Salam to you O Khadijah, Ameerat-Quraysh (“Princess of Quraysh”)!

Salam to you O Khadijah al-Tahira (“The Pure One”)!

Salam to you O Khadijah al-Kubra (Khadijah “the Great”)!

About the Author

Irfan Ullah Khan is the CEO and Co-Founder of Happy Muslim Family, an online platform to help Muslim spouses achieve tranquility in their family life. He is also author of two books “Better Love with Better Half”and “How to Become the Ideal Muslim Parent”.

Categories
Muslim women

In a world of Kardashians, be a Khadeejah RA.

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In the name of Allah, the Most Merciful, the especially Merciful.

“She broke the internet,” they proudly said. “Who did?” asked the little, old man living under the rock.  Kim Kardashian broke the internet by flaunting her fully revealed derrière, slim waistline and all the rest.

We live in a world where women are awarded God-like statuses for having cheekbones so defined they can cut, for having their eyebrows sculpted with the latest tools and for having an eye-poppingly, beautiful hourglass figure. We live in a sad society where girls half my height (I’m an average 5’6 for the record) know how to contour and strobe and highlight and crease.  Now, don’t jump the gun and box me off with the other ‘haraam police’ suffocating in the last cabinet drawer.  I am a huge lover for all things make up and beauty but my concern lies when they have the power to conjure people into obsessive, obnoxious and narcissistic beings.

Turn on the TV, look at billboards around you, pick up a magazine or two, flick through Instagram and you will notice how we, as a society, are sickeningly fascinated or almost bewitched by good looks.

This fascination is universal. Some may disagree and say it’s limited to certain groups of people or specific cultures but I strongly believe otherwise.  Being British Asian, I’ve seen it on both sides and it is the topic that will solely take up most of my ‘Things I HATE’ list.  I have witnessed women gossiping with hearts flashing in their eyes about X who is so slender, so tall and oh so rosy in comparison to Y who, said with almost an expression of sympathy (argh the nerve!), is on the other end of the spectrum. There will be zero mention of piety, zero mention of intelligence and absolutely no mention of their personality. I find it incredibly sad, shallow and superficial that there is no recognition of things that actually require effort like wit, charisma, individuality, loyalty, humour, confidence, ambition and so much more.

We are surrounded by the Kardashians who, in my personal opinion, have really escalated this vile ideology of looks over the rest.

In this difficult age, I salute women whose role models are the likes of Khadeejah and Aa’ishah (Allah be pleased with them both).  As much as I love Aa’ishah (Allah be pleased with her) for her vast knowledge and defiance in the face of corruption, my heart melts with deep love for Khadeejah (Allah be pleased with her).  Her existence precedes mine by over 1400 years but every aspect of her beloved personality and character can be absorbed into ours and if I can, at the very least, continuously strive to mirror that, I am happy.

Khadeejah (Allah be pleased with her) was the daughter of Khuwaylid and Fatimah; they were almost figures of royalty amongst the Quraysh. She was widowed twice and had a son before her marriage to prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings upon him). Khadeejah (Allah be pleased with her) had heard about the honesty and truthfulness of Muhammad (peace and blessings upon him) but asked Nafisah and Maysarah more on his character. Why? Because ultimately, that’s what matters. Muhammad (peace and blessings upon him) and Khadeejah (Allah be pleased with her) came together through character and their marriage was praised throughout Makkah.

When the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings upon him) would remain in Hirah for days on end out of his love for isolation and contemplation, Khadeejah (Allah be pleased with her)  did not complain about his lack of given family time or his continuous absence. Rather, she herself, at the old age of fifty-five, would climb up the rocky mountain to deliver his food and to offer comfort.

On the day of the first revelation when our prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings upon him) came down in a state of shock and confusion and spoke those famous words asking Khadeejah (Allah be pleased with her) to cover him, she didn’t say to him that maybe you shouldn’t be up there in the first place or maybe you’re just going mad all alone or maybe some demons have possessed you. Instead, she religiously, physically and emotionally consoled him. She (Allah be pleased with her) immediately tried to alleviate the grief that had struck our prophet by soothing him with her words, ‘Allah will never disgrace you.’ She (Allah be pleased with her) went on and listed all the beautiful natured habits he held and in essence, was telling him how much she loved him and how much Allah loved him (peace and blessings upon him) came.

وَاللَّهِ مَا يُخْزِيكَ اللَّهُ أَبَدًا، إِنَّكَ لَتَصِلُ الرَّحِمَ، وَتَحْمِلُ الْكَلَّ، وَتَكْسِبُ الْمَعْدُومَ، وَتَقْرِي الضَّيْفَ، وَتُعِينُ عَلَى نَوَائِبِ الْحَقِّ

“By Allah, Allah will never disgrace you. You keep good relations with your kith and kin, help the poor and the destitute, serve your guests generously and assist the deserving calamity-afflicted ones.” (Bukhari)

This woman, the beautiful Khadeejah (Allah be pleased with her), who lived her life like a queen with all the luxuries, supported our Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings upon him) with all that she had financially.  When times got incredibly tough during the boycott, she didn’t have access to, what was once a basic necessity for her, food and drink.  Despite this, she never once wavered but defiantly stood beside our Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings upon him) as a solid force of support and loyalty.

When Khadeejah died (Allah be pleased with her), this support system that never once faltered before came tumbling down. Our prophet Muhammad’s (peace and blessings upon him) loyal wife, first believer, strong supporter,  children’s mother, died as a result of the boycott. She was his fallback, she facilitated his aim, she complimented him in his goal. We all need that one person who will believe in us unconditionally, who will stand by us in moments of fear, insecurity and vulnerability, who will catch us when the going gets tough, who will facilitate our dreams, who will be our backbone and for our Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings upon him), that person was none other than the mighty Khadeejah (Allah be pleased with her).

I dream of a world where women are inspired by others due to everything other than what they are naturally blessed with. I dream of a world where every woman is more than just the fine nose and the hollow cheeks. I dream of a world where every woman is driven by an inner substance and a raging ambition. I dream of a world where every woman wants to be a Khadeejah (Allah be pleased with her) and not a Kardashian.

Allah grant every Muslimah the understanding of her true value, and the courage to practise her faith wholly for His pleasure. Ameen.

Umm Abdullah

20 Safar 1437

Categories
Poems

An Ode to the Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him) Part II

Part II – In Defence of Rasul Ullah (Sal Allahu Alayhi Wasallam)

اللَّهُمَّ صَلِّ عَلى سَيِّدِنَا وَنَبِيِّنَا وَ شَفِيْعِنَا وَحَبِيْبِنَا وَ سَنَدِنَا وَ مَوْلَانَا  مُحَمَّدٍ وَ بَارِكْ وَ سَلِّم

Ismail Ibn Nazir Satia (One who is in dire need of Allah’s Forgiveness, Mercy and Pleasure).

18th Rabiul Awwal 1436

اللَّهُمَّ صَلِّ عَلى سَيِّدِنَا وَنَبِيِّنَا وَ شَفِيْعِنَا وَحَبِيْبِنَا وَ سَنَدِنَا وَ مَوْلَانَا  مُحَمَّدٍ وَ بَارِكْ وَ سَلِّم IMG_9150

The eyes weep, the heart bleeds, but our love for you, O Rasool Ullah (SAW) will never die, In Sha Allah.
Muhammad (Sal Allahu Alayhi Wasallam) is always in our hearts and on our mind.
His (Sal Allahu Alayhi Wasallam)’s remembrance keeps our tongues moist.

Eyes that are blind, hearts that are hard will never recognise your beauty.
Your kindness came like rain, that cares not, on whom it falls upon.
With the light of your sincerity, you broke the clouds of tyranny. .

Categories
Muslim women

A Vision for Muslim Women in the West

Shaykh (Dr) Haitham al-Haddad, London, UK

When you sit down to reflect on what your vision is for your life, how do you know that the vision you’ve chosen is in fact the right one? Is it by the level of happiness you are convinced that your vision, if achieved, would give you? Or is it the fame and attention you know you’ll attain if you fulfilled it? It would be a shame if you spent years going up the ladder of life, only to find that the ladder was leaning against the wrong wall. Imagine if after all the effort you had exerted you found yourself on the Day of Judgment wishing you’d spent all that time and energy pursuing a different vision on Earth, one that would have given you a higher status in the hereafter which, after all, will last forever.On the Day of Judgment, things will become very clear to us in the starkest of ways. We will see reality as it truly is and realize how short was the opportunity that we had on Earth as the following hadith clearly illustrates:

Anas ibn Malik narrates that the messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, “The most affluent of the people in this world, of those who will go to Hell, will be brought on the Day of Resurrection and dipped once in the Fire. Then it will be said: O son of Adam, did you ever see anything good? Did you ever have any pleasure? He will say: No, by Allah, O Lord. Then the most destitute of the people in this world, of those who will enter Paradise, will be brought and dipped once in Paradise, and it will be said to him: O son of Adam, did you ever see anything bad? Did you ever experience any hardship? He will say: No, by Allah, O Lord. I never saw anything bad and I never experienced any hardship.”[1]

Imagine how such a wealthy man will feel about his supposedly successful life on Earth. What once seemed like the ultimate achievement for a human being will seem like a wasted opportunity. As the hadith shows us, any achievement in this life is worthless if it does not lead to success in the hereafter. Allah confirms this, in His saying:

“Everyone shall taste death. And only on the Day of Resurrection shall you be paid your wages in full. And whoever is removed away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise, he indeed is successful. The life of this world is only the enjoyment of deception (a deceiving thing).”[2]

Therefore when we talk about having a vision for our lives, the vision should be one that leads us to maximum achievement in the Hereafter. It was reported by Mu’adh ibn Jabal that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “The People of Paradise will not regret anything except one thing alone: the hour that passed them by and in which they made no remembrance of Allah.”[3] So turning to the specific question of the ideal vision for Muslim women, we have to approach the discussion with a Hereafter-centred worldview.

Although it is praiseworthy that many Muslim women think about how best to spend their lives, it is unfortunate that many Muslim women in the West have been heavily influenced by a Western materialistic understanding of life, values and the status of women. Ironically, increasing numbers of Western non-Muslim women have begun to realise the importance and value of their role in the home and reject the notion of a woman’s worth being defined by her career, even campaigning for the right of women to stay at home.[4]

It seems that some of our Muslim sisters have bought into the career-oriented model of Muslim womanhood. They speak about empowering Muslim women to become successful businesswomen, company directors, financial advisors, police officers, members of Parliament and even actors, singers and dancers as if this is something Islam has endorsed.

To add to their delusion, we find Muslim preachers or activists who promote such ideas without understanding the Qur’anic vision for women properly. We rarely hear them referring to the empowerment of Muslim women by means of being devoted wives and outstanding mothers. Despite the countless studies and research that has been conducted into the breakdown of society in general and the family unit in particular, all of which demonstrate that Western notions of female success have played a significant role in that breakdown, many Muslim women aspire to the very lifestyle that the West is now suffering the consequences of and recoiling from.

What is the noblest Islamic achievement for a Muslim woman?

I am sure that you may have come across various conflicting answers to this question, but instead of opting for what may feel right, we must identify the appropriate tools that enable us to identify what the shari’ah says, since it is the way of life given to us by our All-Wise Creator. I have been analysing the attitude of scripture towards the role of women for some time. We find that there a number of women mentioned in the Qur’an from amongst the believers and the disbelievers. Among the females mentioned in the Qur’an two of the noblest have been presented as role models for all Believers. Allah says,

“And Allah has set forth an example for those who believe, the wife of Pharaoh, when she said: “My Lord! Build for me a home with You in Paradise, and save me from Pharaoh and his work, and save me from the people who are oppressors. And Maryam (Mary), the daughter of ‘Imran who guarded her chastity; and We breathed into her through Our spirit (Gabriel), and she testified to the truth of the words of her Lord and His Scriptures, and she was of the obedient.”[5]

The Prophet’s Companion Abu Musa Al-Ash’ari narrates that the Prophet (peace be upon him) described the status of these two women by saying, “Many amongst men attained perfection but amongst women none attained perfection except Maryam (Mary), the daughter of ‘Imran, and Asiya, the wife of Pharaoh. And the superiority of Aishah to other women is like the superiority of tharid (a dish) to other meals.”[6]

Let us reflect on these two verses and the qualities of these two outstanding and noble women. They were explicitly presented as role models for humanity with their foremost qualities highlighted with candour. The first role model was Asiya, the wife of Pharaoh who was one of the worst tyrants in history. Her most important quality is her distinguished connection with Allah and her fervent desire for the hereafter. She supplicated, “My Lord! Build for me a home with You in Paradise.” Her second core quality was rejecting Pharaoh, his actions and the wrong-doers. She was not taken by the splendour of this life that she could have easily attained as Pharoah’s queen. The second role model, Maryam, was primarily praised for guarding her chastity. Her second major quality was her submission to the will of Allah who tested her by causing her to become pregnant without marriage. She also believed in the reality of the word of Allah “be”, the outcome of the word, and was exceptionally obedient and submissive to Allah.

When the Qur’an mentions other women, it is very evident that in praising any believing woman it praises her for possessing similar qualities. If she is a married woman the Qur’an would praise her as a wife, supporting her husband and being dutiful to him. If she is a mother, the Qur’an would praise her for her important role as a nurturer of the next generation. I have not witnessed the Qur’an praising any woman for her contribution outside of this framework. For example, we don’t see the Qur’an praising a woman for her political involvement, da’wah activism, level of knowledge, social engagement or even leadership. This article cannot possibly include the stories of all women mentioned in the Qur’an, but a simple analysis should confirm this finding.

The wife of Imran mentioned in Surah ‘Aal ‘Imran is another example of an exemplary woman. She was a wife and a mother. The main quality mentioned in Qur’an about her is what is mentioned in the verse,

“(Remember) when the wife of ‘Imran said, “O my Lord! I have vowed to you what is in my womb to be dedicated for your service, so accept this from me. Verily, you are the All-Hearer, the All-Knowing.”[7]

According to the exegete Ibn Kathir, the wife of ‘Imran mentioned here is the mother of Maryam, and her name was Hannah bint Faqudh. Muhammad bin Ishaq, the famous biographer and historian, mentioned that Hannah could not have children and that one day, she saw a bird feeding its chick. She wished she could have children and supplicated to Allah to grant her offspring. Allah accepted her supplication and she became pregnant. She vowed to make her child concentrate on worship and serving Bayt Al-Maqdis (the Masjid in Jerusalem). She did not know then if she would give birth to a male or a female child. The fact that this is the only thing mentioned about her indicates that this is the most important contribution that distinguished her and placed her in this praiseworthy position. It is evident from the story that her goal was to be a mother and when she knew that this was likely to happen she vowed to dedicate her child to serve Allah’s cause in order to thank Him for what he had given her. Similarly, Maryam’s chief contribution was her giving birth to a great Prophet and then taking care of him. The same may be said about the contribution of Musa’s mother. Their role in the lives and achievements of these great men was indispensable.

In this vein, a person might ask himself, why was it that Allah sent male Prophets and not female? He says, “And We sent not before you (as Messengers) any but men.”[8] It is noteworthy that Allah sent over a hundred thousand Prophets, three hundred and fifteen of them messengers[9] and all of them were men.

If we survey the sunnah of the Prophet (peace be upon him), a similar understanding is found. The qualities of devotion to Allah and their families were at the centre of the praiseworthy qualities of women. For example, the Prophet clarifies the Islamic view regarding the best women and the central reason behind it saying, “The best women from the riders of the camels (the best Arab women) are the righteous among the women of Quraish. They are the kindest women to their children in childhood and the most careful of women in regards to the property of their husbands.”[10] In this hadith the Prophet explains their goodness by being good wives and good mothers.

In another statement the Prophet explains that one of the main aims of marriage is to produce and nurture children who follow the Sunnah of the Prophet (peace be upon him) in worshiping Allah and glorifying him. The companion Ma’qil ibn Yasaar narrated that a man came to the messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and said: “O messenger of Allah, I have found a woman who is from a good family and is pretty, but she does not bear children – should I marry her?” He told him not to. Then he came to him a second time and said something similar and he told him not to marry her. Then he came to him a third time and said something similar and he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Marry the one who is loving and fertile, for I will be proud of your great numbers before the nations on the Day of Resurrection.”[11]  Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeem Abaadi said in his commentary of this hadith, ‘Marry the one who is loving means the one who loves her husband; and the one who is fertile is the one who bears a lot of children.”[12]

We also find in the following Prophetic statement narrated by Abu Hurairah and recorded by Ibn Hibbaan, “If a woman offers her five daily prayers, fasts her month (Ramadan), guards her chastity and obeys her husband, it will be said to her, “Enter Paradise from whichever of the gates of Paradise you wish.” If entering paradise is your ultimate aim, then this hadith is a summary of how you may attain that goal and consequently, should be part and parcel of any vision you formulate for a truly successful life.

It is true that there are a number of Qur’anic verses and Prophetic traditions that mention the contribution of women in military activities, their political participation and da’wah work, however an analysis of these incidents confirms that they were carried out as complementary activities to their principal role as wives or mothers. In fact, we can go so far as to say that we do not find an emphasis in the shari’ah on any role for a woman except her role as a mother, a wife or a righteous servant of Allah. For example, we find that the shari’ah considered jihad as one of the noblest activities for men but did not encourage women to take part in it despite the military contribution of a number of female Companions.

There is a very clear hadith that demonstrates the Islamic position concerning women participating in jihad. A’ishah narrated that she asked the Prophet, “O Messenger of Allah, do women have to engage in jihad? He said, “a jihad in which there is no fighting: Hajj and ‘Umrah.”[13] Scholars either disliked women taking part in progressive jihad or prohibited it.  Similarly, a number of textual evidences praise a just male ruler. The vast majority of Muslim scholars were men and women throughout Islamic history were never of a significant number.

In conclusion, I posit that the best role, the most honorable and worthy role for a woman is striving to be a fine wife, a good mother, or both. This role does not only secure the best for a woman in the hereafter, but also fits perfectly with her natural disposition. In her study published by Centre for Policy Studies in 2009, Cristina Odone, former deputy editor of The New Statesman (1998-2004)concluded that “far from being committed to a career, the overwhelming majority of women would prefer to opt out of it. Instead of finding satisfaction in full-time work, most women realise themselves in their other roles as carers, partners, community members, and above all mothers”. Furthermore, McIntosh and Bauer concluded that working women are “often felt overwhelmed and unable to keep up with their job and family responsibilities”. They added that “the working mother felt she had two full time jobs.”[14]

The embracing of this role is a fundamental element for the stability of the family which is the cornerstone of a stable society. There are a number of studies that confirm that housewives are the preservers of society in general and in many cases they offer their families more as homemakers than the income they might bring in from a career does. Other studies confirm that that the overall economic status of society at large is better when the women of that society are focused on the upbringing of children and maintaining the integrity of their families. In the aforementioned study the author suggested that what is needed is “a profound cultural shift.” She adds that “the establishment should stop forcing women into a mould, and allow them instead to realise their ambitions. This means accepting and supporting a value system that is family-centred, not work centred; and rehabilitating free emotional services, from cooking family meals to volunteering at the school fair. We need to redirect our thinking about women’s needs, to create a society in which women are freed from unnecessarily destructive pressures, children thrive and all can feel comfortable with the roles they fulfil not just as workers, but as parents, partners and citizens.”

I ask our sisters in Islam to embrace their true role in society and reap the huge rewards that Allah has in store for them for fulfilling this role. I ask our brothers to support them in fulfilling this role. When we define a vision for our lives, we are seeking to make a contribution and leave a legacy. Your legacy, sisters is that if you take on the role that Allah has ordained for you, then you will positively affect the future of the Muslim ummah and ultimately the future of the world. That is a legacy beyond measure.

In part two we will look at the role Muslim women can play if they are not yet married.

Notes: This is the first article in this series

Sources: www.islam21c.com
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[1] Sahih Muslim

[2] 3:185

[3] Al-Bayhaqi in Shu`ab al-Imaan and al-Tabarani

[4] See: http://www.mothersathomematter.org/

[5] 66:11-12

[6] Sahih Al-Bukhari

[7] 3:35

[8] Al Quran 12:109

[9]  The number was mentioned in a few prophetic statements recorded by Imam Ahmad in his Musnad and ibn Hibban.

[10] Al-Bukhari and Muslim and reported by Abu Hurairah

[11] Abu Dawood and al-Nasaa’i

[12] ‘Awn al-Ma’bood (6/33)

[13] Al-Bukhari and Muslim

[14] A thesis presented in partial fulfilment of the requirements for an MEd in the graduate school of Marietta College titled, “Working Mothers Vs Stay At Home Mothers: The Impact on Children.”